So I'm just fresh from this trip, and I decided for once to take notes during it, and to share it here. I've had many trips and rarely share them, but this one is worth it I think. Please bear in mind I've not 100% reached baseline yet, and excuse poor writing.
I've had some very intense and weird breakthroughs before, but nothing like this. I eyeballed the dose through a classic vapor genie; the mesh wire I use inside the chamber has been used a lot before and has some crystals remnants so the dose I took could potentially have been quite higher than I expected (>60mg). I was suddenly projected into a sort of comic book version of the room I was consuming the DMT in; so far, nothing unusual (I've had that effect before). But then I was suddenly projected into a tunnel, which opened into a cloud-like background space (except not exactly like clouds; some more complex stuff I think; there was movement inside). I was riding on the belly of a being; a blue happy elephant, holding shining stuffs in both its hands. We were flying very, very fast and he was occasionally looking at me. Were I to try to describe the look it gave me, I would say: not prideful, not disapproving either; mostly an acknowledgement of my presence, with perhaps a look like it recognized me (and I *felt* for a moment I recognized it as well, but that quickly went away). I felt for sure whatever this creature was though, it was not me, or part of me; it felt like an independent entity; and it felt like an incredibly powerful being. Flying through this space, and being on the belly of this creature, felt extremely good - I felt loved (though I'm not 100% sure it came from it or the space we were evolving it itself).
The being seemed to encourage me somehow. We flew for what subjectively felt like an hour or more; there were two noticeable times during this:
- The first one was about what felt like 10 or 15 minutes in; I heard something like a roar behind us and "felt" a threat behind us somehow. Just as I thought about it I felt like a weird metal grid appear behind me while we flew and a thought projected by the elephant being that it was alright, nothing could hurt us. We flew on.
- Later on, about 40 minutes in, I felt suddenly distinctly weird, like I had dropped something; I suddenly plunged to somewhere I thought the thing was, from my own volition, leaving the elephant entity; and then suddenly I was in a space where everything was exactly the same, but different; I saw my ride with the elephant being, and my dropping down towards the thing I lost, and my seeing my room as a comic book scenery, all along side one another; like cubes connected by something. The vision quickly dropped, but the impression I distinctly got was that what I was seeing was an interpretation; the way my brain was trying to make sense of something much more unusual than it was used to (and that may include my "flying" with the elephant thing, not just this punctual flying down).
I went back to our flight; about 5 minutes before it stopped I heard a very human voice in my head saying (I think) "this is the way" or "this is the right way"; it freaked me out a bit because while I often have perceived messages from entities during breakthroughs (including this one) I never heard a voice like that. After hearing that, for a moment I started questioning myself and asking myself if I was worthy of all this (among other things because, again, the flight itself felt like ecstasy; sheer pleasure all along); when I though about this, the elephant's face became a lion and looked at me. I felt mostly approval; like I had been judged mostly worthy (although possibly capable of more). And then I came back to the comic-book-like room for a few minutes.
I should add that while all this was occurring I was remembering very clearly that I took DMT and where I was; it just that at one point (I'd say 5 minutes into flying) it stopped to matter at all; I knew I had taken something but mostly I was freaking out because so much was the intensity of the trip I was genuinely starting to wonder whether I had somehow found a way to teleport to this cloud-like space or something. Like I was never coming back. And in fact coming back felt bitter-sweet; a huge wave of reassurance I was still myself coupled with regret for the space I had just left.
Mostly I'm interested in sharing my experience; but also of hearing about similar trips from other people. I also feel incredibly grateful for having experienced this (I always try to use DMT in a spiritual way but it's the first time I felt so connected to some other intelligence; to something greater).