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DMT - Reunion with my Mum Options
 
Bonné
#1 Posted : 4/21/2015 6:40:56 PM

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DMT
Reunion


Pharmacology
Substance: Dimethyltryptamine (DMT)
Potency: 96%+ Pure
Dosage: 45-50mg’s and 15-20mg’s
Route of Administration: Vaporized

PRE-CONDITIONS
(Mind)Set: Average positively inclined mindset, definite pre-flight anxiety, lacking considerations and truthful respect.
(Physical condition) Set: My friend’s apartment in fairly small and he has no knowledge about psychedelics, but he’s very accepting of the personal choice of using them. This was also the first time testing my new vaporizer, the Muad Dib.
(Location) Setting: At friend’s apartment.
Time of day: 3 p.m. to 9 p.m.
Recent drug use: None.
Last meal: Shared a family sized pizza with my friend.

PARTICIPANT
Gender: Male.
Body weight: 74kg.
Known sensitivities: None.
History of use: Very experienced in most psychedelic compounds.

TRIP REPORT
The day prior to the experience I had just received the concentrate vaporizer, Muad Dib, which has been designed and manufactured by Magic Flight. According to a couple of reports, this vaporizer was said to be the perfect device for DMT. Based on the design, quality and feedback reports, I instantly fell in love with this tiny wonder. So I went over to my friend’s apartment to try it out, as it had just come in time for our weekend feast. I had tried a minuscule amount at home, but experienced no effects.

At my friend’s house I placed 3 screen trenches inside and stuffed all of them to the rim with DMT. They were literally so over-full that around 5-10mg’s fell into the brass socket. I didn’t weigh out the dosages, as I’ve never been a fan controlling where you’ll go with DMT in that regard. In other words, I like the adventurous aspect of eyeballing DMT. However, according to a report, 3 full trenches can presumably hold 45-50mg’s, which should be more than enough for a breakthrough.



I listened to some shamanistic icaros singing intended for Ayahuasca journeys and I felt prepared to dive really deep. I took the full dosage in a matter of seconds and held it in while lying in the bed. Although everything seemed perfect, I didn’t experience any effects apart from my legs becoming heavier. After 5 minutes of nothing, I was really disappointed and couldn’t even believe that such a massive dosage had just vanished completely into nothingness.

Therefore, I decided to load all 3 screen trenches once more and went ahead with the same procedure. This time I did get a very faint Tryptamine buzz in my body and a very slight change in perception, but nothing out of the ordinary. One thing I did notice, however, was that a joker/trickster type of entity tried to scare jump me by suddenly jumping into my field of vision with flapping arms and its tongue sticking out. It was very dark and I could barely make it out, but it was clearly an entity. Apart from these ridiculous effects, I experienced nothing. At this point I had completely given up and decided to complain to some people about my disappointing attempts at using this device. Although my attempts failed miserably, my friend encouraged me to try again after we had eaten the pizza.

The third attempt at something is supposedly always the lucky attempt, and I can definitely verify that now. This time I only loaded a single screen trench, because I honestly didn’t expect it to work, and I was already sad about losing 90-100mg’s of DMT on nothing. Since I wasn’t expecting anything to happen, I simply sat in a chair without any music playing. In other words, I was completely unprepared for what was going to hit me in the next moments to come. What I did different this time, was heating the DMT for a couple more seconds. Although this was the only real difference I made, I’ve been contemplating that the true reason for the 2 first dosages not having any effects, was because I dosed recklessly and was therefore kept out of the experience on purpose.

I assume the dosage to be around 15-20mg’s, seeing as it was only a third of the previous amounts. Despite it being such a small dose in comparison, it truly hit me like a sledgehammer. It was pretty much on par with my strongest Changa experience, which I found to be very extreme. Upon inhalation, I instantly felt the immediate effects of the known DMT onset. The entire room was transformed to a crystalline plastic paradise made up entirely of self-replicating and folding fractals. It was a stunning beauty. The room had turned into completely liquid Hyperspace silly putty. I almost forgot to exhale, because I got the sensation that I was underwater.

Seconds later I closed my eyes and sat with an erect spine with my meditative mudra. Before me was an infinitely large membrane that consisted entirely of a vast field of repeated fractals in a large array of different colours. The membrane seemed solid, but it had a very wobbly appearance, like a non-Newtonian fluid being subject to pulsating vibrations. As I was standing before this vast wonder, something was gradually protruding from the other side of the membrane. It clearly represented a human, and at one point I even mistook it for being myself. After being pushed to the limit, the membrane popped like a needle to a balloon, and I was flashed by a bright light. Seconds later I could see the shape of a human being in the distance. It came increasingly closer to me, until I at one point made out who it truly was.

My mother stood before my very eyes for the first time in 4 years. I couldn’t even begin to comprehend what was taking place, because it was clearly beyond all imagination. She had taken on the appearance as her last human form, in order for me to recognize who I was really in the presence of at this moment. Describing the sight itself would be incredibly difficult, but she was made up of tiny fractal structures that seemed to be very stable, whereas other entities I’ve previously encountered seem to constantly transform their appearance. It was not only her features that made her identity apparent to me, but also the motherly presence and comfort that I recognized almost immediately. No thinking was able to enter this space with us; it was all super crisp and clear. No involvement or interpretation from my mind whatsoever. I couldn’t even utter a single word if I wanted to, because it was extremely staggering. Although I wouldn’t have been able to bring up a conversation, I definitely did not feel the need to. I was completely content with the moment, so thoughts and words would serve no purpose except for clouding and detracting from the experience. It was nothing but a moment of pure serenity, sincerity and perfection.

I was swimming in an ocean of emotions at the time. Each wave of emotion hit me like a thousand gunshots. They can by no means put into human language. I was so overwhelmed by the sheer force and magnitude behind this event that I literally felt like I was swimming in emotional states, because I became so dripping wet that I can’t even believe it. My eyes were watering, my mouth was over-salivating, every pore of my skin was excreting so much sweat that it would amount to running a marathon and I literally thought I had pissed myself in pure ecstasy.

At one point she slowly brought her hand to my face and stroked my left cheek in such a compassionate and non-judgmental manner that my tear canals could no longer keep up with the moment and burst out completely. I couldn’t handle the situation, but it was such an immeasurable relief to meet my mother a last time. I know from this point onward that she’s truly watching over me and protecting me, and this comes down to nothing but purely unconditional love. I instantly knew from the encounter with her that she holds no judgment towards my stupid decisions in regards to my former experiences with Salvia Divinorum. It was a very deep and accepting understanding that resonated from her presence. She looked beyond all of my convictions and identifications. In other words, she contained an endless capacity for compassion that is completely unparalleled by anything.

The experience was so emotionally powerful that I kind of slipped in and out of the experience, which is also partly to blame on my friend, who kept walking around and fiddling with things to keep himself occupied for the short duration. Although I lost the clear vision of my mother, I could feel her presence throughout the experience and I had a reassuring sense that she was watching over and protecting me.

After I lost the visual representation of her, I was brought into a Hyperspatial version of the room that I was already situated in. Everything around me seemed to be imbued with an elegant liveliness. I could see and hear the entities running and morphing past me, they seemed to be very busy with something that I could not get a real grasp of. When they surged past me, I could even feel faint gusts of wind hit me, as if they were moving at very rapid speeds. There really wasn’t any communication going on in the experience, at least not verbally or telepathically. Generally, I find that the rest of the experience after the encounter with my mother to be very clouded and hard to recall. I really only remember the entities hussling around and the beautiful room that I was sitting in at the time.

I opened my eyes to a pretty landscape of fractalish open eyed visuals and asked my friend how long it had been. He replied that it had been no more than 5 minutes in total. All I could really do at this point, was to hold my hands up to my eyes and say “wow” while recollecting the experience that had just taken place. I was in an exceptionally uplifted mood and was extremely appreciative of the opportunity that I got. I could never have wished for a better and more influential experience than this. It wasn’t exactly world shattering or life changing in any sense, but it was ultimately the best comfort and reassurance that I could’ve received at this point in time. I’m thrilled to know that my mother is fine and that there are no longer any doubts within me as to whether she lives on in one way or the other.

One thing I do have to revise and contemplate after this experience, is my views on afterlife. For a while I’ve had the conviction that there really is no such thing as an individual consciousness, but rather that everything in- and outside of existence is made up of a collective consciousness. It could simply be that this very being that underlies us all portrayed as my mother to give me the experience that I needed at this point in time, as this would certainly fit into my framework, but who am I really to propose existential and non-existential answers to unanswerable questions.

I am just beyond grateful that I wasn’t handed my own ass on one of the 45-50mg dosages, as I’m completely certain that I wouldn’t have been able to ride it out just as easily as I did with this experience. I got exactly the experience that I was in need of, neither under- or overwhelming in any way, just perfect. DMT is a magical compound and it holds a very dear place in the depth of my heart. Truly transformational. Thanks a lot.
 

Live plants. Sustainable, ethically sourced, native American owned.
 
Doc Buxin
#2 Posted : 4/21/2015 8:15:55 PM

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Wow! What an incredible report!!

Thank you for sharing that one Bonne!

I am happy for you that you were privileged to experience what you did.

Next time though, don't be so cavalier with your initial doses. You keep that up & you're gonna get slapped silly someday!

May peace be with all of us.Smile
Freedom's so hard
When we are all bound by laws
Etched in the scheme of nature's own hand
Unseen by all those who fail
In their pursuit of fate
 
null24
#3 Posted : 4/21/2015 9:24:49 PM

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Thanks for a well written report, and yes, it probably is best that the much higher doses were ineffective.

This is an interesting report to me because my mother is in a very long drawn out process of leaving this realm that i don't fully understand, and I've been reeling because I've apparently missed opportunity to say goodbye;even though she is still alive, she isn't showing signs of really relating to her environment. I've always had a strong psychic connection with her, not anything cultivated but something on par with telekinesis at times.

My father and she live 3000 miles away from me and financial and other realities prevent travel down there. I've been holding onto my part of a recent extraction while i try to get some semblance of coherency, I've not been dealing with the news of her impending death, cognitive loss, and all the regret very well. However, i do not doubt the power that is DMT and think it may help to bridge these things, that maybe with it i can say goodbye.

That probably sounds crazy, and using a substance to 'somehow' instigate a psychic connection, to use DMT as an astral cell phone of sorts probably is. There's certainly no precedence for it, tmk. I align with you as far as your thoughts on the after life, and probably by way of explaining your experience would apply the same course of reason that you did. That this collective universal mind that we all coalesce from and dissolve back into had something to show you and put on that shape, the mother archetype came to you as your own. But then again.. .? Many mystics thru time beg to differ.

I've been wondering if a connection could be made to one basically trapped in body, but i really wonder if she's there to do so with. Apologies for responding with something that has little or nothing to do with your trip, lol. It set me to thinking tho.. .
Sine experientia nihil sufficienter sciri potest -Roger Bacon
*γνῶθι σεαυτόν*
 
Bonné
#4 Posted : 4/26/2015 11:54:38 AM

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Last visit: 22-Apr-2023
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Thank you very much for the nice replies.
I definitely will be increasing my dosages in smaller increments in the future, so I don't end up with more than I can swallow, haha.

Null, I don't see any reason as to why using psychedelics in such a manner would sound crazy. If it works for you, then what does anybody's opinions matter. When I told my classmate that I met my mother on DMT he just stared at me with 2 large googly eyes, as if I'm completely retarded and dumbfounded for believing the experience. Then he went on to say that I should probably lay off the drugs before I get locked up, lol.
 
Doc Buxin
#5 Posted : 4/27/2015 6:24:03 PM

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Bonné wrote:
...Then he went on to say that I should probably lay off the drugs before I get locked up, lol..




Well, as funny as it may seem to you Bonne, I have been locked up for relating life-changing psychedelic experiences!

Luckily, by law, the mental hospital couldn't hold me for more than 3 days unless they could "prove" that I was "insane". After 3 days of talking to the psychiatrists, they concluded that I was not insane & they let me go.

Nowadays, I can tell the story & laugh about it, but back when it was happening it seemed to me to be a crushing betrayal of some family members & friends who were sure that because I was dabbling in psychedelics & reporting all sorts of wierd phenomena that I should be locked up.

Needless to say, after that, I kept my mouth shut & was extrememly careful about who I shared that kind of information with!

Just a word to the wise.Smile
Freedom's so hard
When we are all bound by laws
Etched in the scheme of nature's own hand
Unseen by all those who fail
In their pursuit of fate
 
Psybin
#6 Posted : 4/27/2015 9:49:49 PM

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Doc Buxin wrote:
Bonné wrote:
...Then he went on to say that I should probably lay off the drugs before I get locked up, lol..




Well, as funny as it may seem to you Bonne, I have been locked up for relating life-changing psychedelic experiences!

Luckily, by law, the mental hospital couldn't hold me for more than 3 days unless they could "prove" that I was "insane". After 3 days of talking to the psychiatrists, they concluded that I was not insane & they let me go.

Nowadays, I can tell the story & laugh about it, but back when it was happening it seemed to me to be a crushing betrayal of some family members & friends who were sure that because I was dabbling in psychedelics & reporting all sorts of wierd phenomena that I should be locked up.

Needless to say, after that, I kept my mouth shut & was extrememly careful about who I shared that kind of information with!

Just a word to the wise.Smile


Gotta love PA's 3 day rule, huh? Confused
 
Doc Buxin
#7 Posted : 4/27/2015 11:47:54 PM

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Last visit: 26-Jan-2021
Location: 40th Parallel
Psybin wrote:
Doc Buxin wrote:
Bonné wrote:
...Then he went on to say that I should probably lay off the drugs before I get locked up, lol..




Well, as funny as it may seem to you Bonne, I have been locked up for relating life-changing psychedelic experiences!

Luckily, by law, the mental hospital couldn't hold me for more than 3 days unless they could "prove" that I was "insane". After 3 days of talking to the psychiatrists, they concluded that I was not insane & they let me go.

Nowadays, I can tell the story & laugh about it, but back when it was happening it seemed to me to be a crushing betrayal of some family members & friends who were sure that because I was dabbling in psychedelics & reporting all sorts of wierd phenomena that I should be locked up.

Needless to say, after that, I kept my mouth shut & was extrememly careful about who I shared that kind of information with!

Just a word to the wise.Smile


Gotta love PA's 3 day rule, huh? Confused



Depending upon almost an infinite amount situations, one could extrapolate that rule to be 3 weeks, 3 months or 3 years!Smile

Or, as in the case with some of my experiences, 3 decades have passed before I came upon the nexus & shared some stories that I have not shared at all previously!Big grin
Freedom's so hard
When we are all bound by laws
Etched in the scheme of nature's own hand
Unseen by all those who fail
In their pursuit of fate
 
hardboiled
#8 Posted : 4/30/2015 9:12:02 AM

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I was wondering if you will write anything about it and i am glad you decided to make a report Bonné.Very happy
Beautiful read buddy.Thumbs up

˝What you are is this deep deep thing...and you love to play.˝ - ?
 
Bonné
#9 Posted : 5/2/2015 1:37:07 AM

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Thanks for all the wonderfully sweet comments. Smile

I'll be writing up another report of today's experiences when I get the "time", ha Very happy
 
TGO
#10 Posted : 5/16/2015 12:37:59 AM

Music is alive and in your soul. It can move you. It can carry you. It can make you cry! Make you laugh. Most importantly, it makes you feel! What is more important than that?

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What a beautifully written report. You had me entranced! It warms my soul and brings a tear to my eye knowing that you were able to meet up with your mother again! Lovely!

Best of luck in any future endeavors,

-The Grateful One-
New to The Nexus? Check These Out:



One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish

 
travsha
#11 Posted : 5/27/2015 9:25:09 PM

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Very beautiful! Interesting to hear of this experience with DMT as well, as I usually hear about people talking to dead relatives after ingesting plants more then DMT....

I lost my mother 6 years ago, and after a few years she started visiting me in visions a little bit... She really helped me understand a lot. For me San Pedro and Salvia are what really helped me talk to her most...

Thank you for sharing your story Smile
 
 
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