SWIM decided to try 230mg a few days ago, he had tried 75 and 100 a few times and had been delighted with the effects, a soft glow and mild euphoria accompanied by ever so slight psychedelic effects 4-5 hours in.
But this 230mg dose was very very different. Swim felt a shiver down his spine as he drank the water with 230mg cleaned mesc hcl. He went outside to chop some wood and prepare for the evening. It was 6pm and the sun was beginning to set. SWIM realy didnt expect much from this dose, he thought it might be slightly more euphoric and thats it. half way through chopping the wood SWIM felt a little dizzy, things were funny, our lives, how we prepare things and think about them.... A shift in consciousness was already beginning and SWIM realised this would be much deeper than the previous tries with mesc.
He chopped the wood and started a fire inside, the warm glow and lick of the flames was intriguing, no different looking but definitely interesting. SWIM then spent the next hour (7pm by this stage) playing with his dog. It occurred to swim that the dogs obsession with its ball was absolutely no different to our obsession with cars or houses or watches etc. The ball became a perfect metaphor with which to view SWIMS own material obsessions. With the ball in view and attainable, the dog was obsessed and completely focused on having it. Its personality changed so drastically that SWIM was no longer its main concern, the ball was. Put the ball in a cupboard and the dog returned to just living, and it then directed its attention back to SWIM and his wife. SWIMS wife didnt have any mesc, she was content reading books and watching SWIM. SWIM realised that if we can take our attention off our own respective ball, we would live far more rich and satisfying lives.
8pm now and swim is feeling very euphoric indeed, lights and softly shifting patterns are apparent on the back of his eyelids. The music (butch cassidy soundsystem) is beginning to fill the room, float about in the corners and wash over swim like a warm current. Lying down with his head towards the fire, a warm space seems to open up and SIWM feels as though he is floating slightly. This psychedelic is very smooth, in much the same way mdma comes on, its subtle and then before long you realise that your actually quite dazed and feeling it. SWIMS wife puts on a movie, at first SWIM didnt want to watch it, he perceived it as a manufactured product and it showed no appeal, but SWIM wanted to be close to his wife, it struck SIWM how incredibly accepting this psychedelic is, one can see a situation that might be uncomfortable but he can see that there will be beauty and positivity in it as well, so there for worthwhile. SWIMS wife put on slumdog millionaire, SWIM has seen this before and enjoyed it very much, but this time it was powerful beyond words. SWIM felt every emotional part of this film ten fold. The dark and painful moments resonated with SWIM, he felt sympathy on a level never before experienced. And when the two lovers finally get to connect at the end of the movie.... SWIMS entire body glowed and surged with positive energy. He couldn't believe how deeply he felt this movie. Its seems to SWIM, that Mescaline's greatest attribute is its ability to connect, with whatever you put your attention on to. SWIM realised that this is a powerful teacher, a great respect for the plant was forming.
10 pm now and SIWM is feeling very psychedelic, his jaw feels as tho it has pressure on it and he feels a little giddy in the stomach, SWIM is surprised at how strong this dose was, open eye visuals are now making them self apparent, a slow animation of objects and vivid enhancement of colors. SWIM decides to go to the toilet, he is blown away by the wall paper in the bathroom, the people and objects are alive, it is subtle but the movement is there and the beauty, it draws swim in to the point where swim closes his eyes and is all of a sudden shown detailed visions of the female movie star in slumdog millionaire, she is beautiful and detailed. Her face appears, and then disappears, all the while interspersed with colorful dark shades of purple and green. Her face flashes a few more times, never there long enough for it to completely come alive, but SWIM can see that Mescaline has so much more to offer. SWIM realises that 400mg at once would have been very overwhelming. If swim had not extracted and cleaned his product he would be unsure on exact dosage and perhaps anxious going into the experience. But swim could be confident on how long this would last and how much had been consumed. He is eternally grateful to the nexus for this information.
After a few hours more of music SWIMS wife decided to head off to bed. SWIM feels very stimulated so stays up and decides to head outside for a walk around the property. From swims vantage point he can see the city below. The ultimate complexity and vastness of space and time seems easily accepted, SWIM wouldn't say its an understanding, more of an acceptance that this is the way of all things and the same vastness can be seen in the palm of your hand as can be seen in the nights sky.
SWIM looks over his garden admiring his Pedro. In awe of this beautiful and gentle alkaloid. Its ability to make one feel empathy, acceptance and a greater understanding of our own behavior is an asset like no other. SWIM feels completely centered. This produces another wave of complete euphoria, SWIM is very content and amazed that this cactus is naturally here for us to explore.
The experience lasted a long time. SWIM went to bed by about 4am (10 hours later) and while drifting off to sleep the cactus was still producing plays of color and light on his eyelids. He did fall asleep tho, and slept waking occasionally for some 8 hours. SWIM felt tired all the next day, a little drained but very content. SWIM still feels a little vacant today (over 48 hours later), but perhaps this is down to his own thoughts that are still in wondrous and constant flow over the experience. More likely it is the alkaloid taking its time to completely leave the body
A huge thank-you to anyone that helped SWIM come to this path. It was very deep and very meaningful to SWIM, more so than any other psychedelic he has tried. Clear headed, focused, but powerful at the same time, and very surprising for such a low dose. SWIM looks forward to a split 400mg dose over the course of an afternoon and evening
Mucho Aroha