September 2012

300mg Syrian Rue extract
50mg dmt taken orally

Setting: quiet coastline, on a sunny day in the afternoon.

HELLO!!! In September, I got dumped by a girl that I love. I felt horrible about because she is the only woman I have ever loved, and I had feelings like I would never love anyone again. I felt like my love life was all over forever. Ayahuasca helps me deal with feelings, so I went to the beach and took ayahuasca. I was walking along the shore, looking out in to the water, and felt like I dissolved in to the abyss. I reached a state of utter loneliness and depression. I told myself, "I am alone. I have always been alone, and I will always be alone". The pain I was feeling became so great that I felt like I was dying.

The ayahuasca started having such a strong effect that I was having trouble walking, or keeping a straight face. I was crying as I was stumbling along the beach, and trying hard to appear normal, but it was impossible. I became worried that if someone on the beach, or in a beach side cabin saw me, they’d think I was insane or something. And pretty much, at the time, I was totally despondent. So, I had to get out sight. I decided to walk fast up a sand dune, and in to a secluded forested area that is totally out of sight from anyone on the beach. I go there often to be alone. Never seen anyone else there.

This was the loneliest moment of my life, and when I got to the top of the dune to the spot where I wanted to rest…… to my surprise, I did not find emptiness there, but I was suddenly within 8 feet of a naked woman who was using this secluded nature spot to masterbate. All of a sudden, just like that. One moment I am lonely as hell for a woman and the next second, I was right in front of a naked chick in a sex act.

I was shocked, but since I was high as fuck, I didn’t show much of a reaction. She covered her face, laughed and said, “oh, you caught me”. I didn’t know what to do, and I was so high I didn’t even know what to say. I just looked at her and smiled and said, “sorry”. Then I hesitated, wanting to do more, I wanted to join her, fuck her, talk to her, something. But being so high I was overwhelmed, so I turned around and walked away, to which she replied….. “awwwww”.

I found another place nearby to lie down. I was so overwhelmed by the pharma and the surprise that just happened, that I sprawled out in the sand like I got shot, and convulsed there for a while, as pharma, loneliness, and sexual hormones all raged through my body. As I was down, I was thinking, “This can’t be coincidence. I HAVE to go back to her and try again. She must want me to go back. The way she said, “awwwww”. Somehow I know that she was intrigued by being caught by me, and disappointed that I just walked away. But I can’t, I thought. I’m so high, and I already walked away.”

I decided that I must try. So, I walked back over to her area, where I found her humping a tree and fingering herself. I felt weird, which probably made her feel weird, and I said, “hi…… do you want to be alone?”. She was like, “yeah…..”. So I was like, “ok”, and I turned around and walked away, to which she again replied, “awwwww…”

I walked away and I was furious. I thought, “it’s NOT over!!! It seems like it’s over, but it’s not over. She wants me, I just didn’t make her feel comfortable”. So, I decided that I was just going to let her finish herself off, and then when she gets dressed and comes back out in to the open, I’ll talk to her then. I sat and allowed the pharma to make the beach something of divine beauty, and waited for this woman to finish masturbating so I could somehow talk to her while being blitzed on pharma. I didn’t know how I’m going to do it without seeming creepy, because I’m a random high guy in the woods, and I already approached twice and walked away, but I don’t care, this isn’t over, I thought.

So, after 15 minutes or so, she came out with her bathing suit on and sat down where I could see her. So I decided I was going to go over, I pointed at her, and walked through the dunes to meet. I sat down far away from her, so as to not be over aggressive. I said, “I wanted to ask you something…. what were you doing?” She said, “I was just playing”. So I said, “wouldn’t you rather have someone to play with?”. She said something like she’s still getting over a divorce and isn’t ready to be with someone.

I said, “I’m sorry I startled you. I would have talked to you earlier, but I’m very high, so it’s hard for me to act normal, and I didn’t want to scare you.” She was like, “it’s ok. Yeah I can tell you’re high”. We talked about nothing for a few minutes, until I asked again, “but wouldn’t you rather be with someone here instead of being alone?” She was like, “maybe”. Then, I made my move, inched closer, and said, “I’m not asking to be with you, but would you mind if I got….. just a little closer?” and as I said that, I sat right beside her so we were touching.

I asked her what she does. Something retarded. I asked, “aren’t you going to ask what I do?” she asked, and I said, “I give massages”, and I put my hands on her shoulders, and started rubbing, and then I got right behind her, so I was basically embracing her from behind. We chatted as I rubbed, and ever so gracefully, my touch became more and more exploratory, and my head came closer to hers, until I could kiss her neck.

The pharma made me very sensitive to her emotions. I could feel her, and I'm assuming she could feel me. It was like everything she felt would give me beautiful visions inside my head, and I reflected those feelings back to her, which she seemed to enjoy. I said, “did you enjoy your massage? You didn’t even have to pay for it, or give me anything”. She said, “I’ll make it up to you next time”, and then I said, “you can make it up to me right… now” and as I said that I turned her head toward mine and went in for a kiss on the lips, which she accepted and wanted more. We made out for a bit, it got more intense, the clothes started coming off, and then we're rolling in the sand and fingering each other and what not.

After a while we were done playing, she said she had to go meet her girlfriend for something. We got dressed and hugged and talked some more for a bit. Then something really unusual happened. I felt a very authentic connection with her. She got this really sincere look on her face, looked deep in to my eyes and said, “you deserve something good in your life. You’ve been waiting for something good to come in to your life and turn things around. I can tell It will happen. You deserve it.” I was shocked. It was like we could both feel the same things. When she told me this, I had the craziest sense that it was not this woman that was talking to me, but the universe itself was literally giving me this message, and it was coming through in the form of this woman. It was freaky, and awesome. I didn’t know what to say, so I just looked at her, smiled, and said, “ok, thanks”.

She left, and I laid back down in the sand to resume my psychedelic high, feeling much better than before I met her. It was very nice to feel relaxed, instead of lonely as hell and despondent. So anyway, the moral of the story is..... sometimes unexpected, cool shit happens.

Wow Apoc, between this and your other report I'm speechless.

I can't imagine what that would be like coming up on someone masturbating in public while your high on pharma, lol. This was quite the read, thanks for sharing! It sounds like a lot is going on in your world as of late. It's awesome that you are able to have these far out and healing experiences after going through a rough patch.

Much love.

I don't know about you lot...but I'm off to the beach..

(great read Apoc)

nice dude, i love realizing it's the universe behind things.

The universe always finds a way,

great read Apoc! glad to see you writing reports!

haaha, ahh man what a day you had. best report ive read in a while. funny how things worked out. Masturbating in the wood humping tree, what a chance Cant blame you for trying, seems it worked out perfectly BEST ive read in a long time

Great fantasy read!

Love it !!

DMT-Nexus: Penthouse Section!

Edit: Oh and, btw, would you mind giving, like, the EXACT GPS coordinates of that section of beach?

XD

maybe I should rename the title. I was going to call it "Sexy Beach Pickup", but I figured fantasy pharma has alliteration. But then some people might think the report was a fantasy and didn't happen, lol. It happened. I called it fantasy because the whole thing was like something out of a fantasy that actually happened.

I've been studying pickup for the last little while. I hope the world evolves to a point where stories like these aren't super rare, once in a life time gems... but sexual abundance, adventure, and free love are considered a natural part of existence.... as opposed to repression and practicality being the norm. Fuckin people going around with holding love, as if they don't have any to give.... as if they're saving it for.... what the fuck exactly? Then they die and realize that life wasn't leading anywhere, they had the power to fully experience life the whole time, but they let it waste away due to fear of breaking through social conditioning.

I am glad it was real then! It was really well written, and I guess that's why I wondered. You have very good skills- are you a writer by profession too, in addition to masseuse?

It seemed pretty far out, not for the 60s and 70s, but now it's different, so different... in our society, like you said, people withholding love, waiting for the perfect ONE person to satisfy them... I don't want to live that way, but there are some sick folks out there too, women are usually more cautious.

However, love on the beach, in the grass, the elevator, the right moment, the right energy, the right person, definitely. oh definitely! It was a good read.

Amazing read, wow!

A few years ago this would have sounded like the most improbable experience... Nowadays, I know that magic sometimes happens, yet I don´t think that the above experience would have happened without psychedelics.

Sometimes I feel as if higher doses of psychedelics influenced (= decreased) the levels of probability (please, don´t ask me how it works )

Have you meet the girl since? imagine telling that story to your kids. I think this would be a good ending to How I meet your mother

I enjoyed reading this a lot. The whole notion of the scene of you tripping and walking into a random naked masturbating chick is just hilarious and amazing. Indeed it almost seems too random to be chance, in any case I can't imagine many better ways of resolving depressive loneliness. Your massages sounds pretty good as well.

What are the chances eh. In your case, pretty damn good

I'm glad you enjoyed it... but by the sound of it who wouldn't ? Praise be to the universe for people open for such cosy nonsense on a whim.

The bit about her humping a tree had be laughing, i must admit.

Great story though! It really put me in a good mood reading this!

Hey! Thanks for the compliments. No, I’m not a professional writer. Maybe I could be if I figure out something that people would actually buy.

Two years ago, this experience would have never happened because I did not know about game or pickup. If I saw that woman masturbating years ago, I probably would have walked away, assumed nothing would ever happen between us, I wouldn’t have the nerve to even ask, and I probably would have tried to hide behind some trees and sneak a peak without her knowing. She probably would have seen me, got creeped out and left. But instead, I decided that I would like more sex and it shouldn’t be so damn difficult to get it, so I learned pickup and it helped me a lot socially.

Very subtle, yet important things make pickup possible. For example, when I apologized for being high, I said it in a totally normal tone, as if I were apologizing for having a swollen lip that affects my speech. I gave the impression that my unusual movements and slight difficulty speaking was merely the effect of a drug, but everything is perfectly fine. In the past, I would have giggled about being high, or somehow communicated that I am uncomfortable with the situation. But instead, I was like, “hey, yeah, I’m a bit high right now but I still want to get to know you, it’s all good…..so anyway, have a massage….. how does my boner feel?”

I always come back to read this particular report, yet i have told you how much i have enjoyed this. To me, this report is really exceptional, thank you!

This was the first time I had read this report... I kept waiting for the classic "and then I started to come down and realized I was still on my couch at home" moment!

Thanks for sharing this wonderful (albeit a few years old) experience report, Apoc!