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Re-occuring lifeless, synethtic minecraft like open eye environment Options
 
HumbleTraveler
#1 Posted : 7/23/2014 8:16:27 AM

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This is recurring. It just happened again. Im beginning to really question why I keep getting this. Am I not going far enough and Im getting stuck in this void-like space between here and 'there', or what. Because its frustratingly bothersome.

15mg freebase, GVG, sittin outside looking up at the night sky. Crickets chirping, it was nice and peaceful. I took in about 2 hits, probably around half of the total dose, sat back closed my eyes and rode the geometry displayed on my eyelids for about 2 minutes. It was nice. No OEV's, just solid smooth CEV's.

I decided to finish off the disc to attempt to go a little further, and, welp, it didnt go so well.

The rest of the dose hit me HARD and fast. In the previous thread I made about a pretty much identical scenario months back, I began to freak out but all I could think was "well, I kinda got what I pushed for again"

I only slightly lost it this time, its such an intensely overwhelming feeling that I literally CAN NOT calm myself. I was like OKAY Im just going to get up and go inside. All I feel is like I was watching everything on my street turn to plastic. The trees, the car across the street, the house, everything just became lifeless and fake looking. I felt like I was made of plastic, like I no longer existed, and that the concept I believe as "me" did not exist, never did exist, and that Im really just the imagination of myself. I jumped up from the chair from being overcome by this environment and feeling like I was scrambling to make the trip end by looking for something that looked familiar. Luckily within a minute, everything was back to almost normal.

Has anyone else encountered a scenario like this frequently? Is this "standard"? I really had a very clear mind and had no negative thoughts coming into it. The identical experience happened months and months ago and I feel as though I had come to terms with it and if it happened again, I would just ride it out and be ok with it. But the in the moment feeling is SO unbelievably intense and overwhelming I just cant seem to shake it and tell myself, "this is the most powerful hallucinogen, just relax and ride it out".

Is it the fact that freebase is just an unforgiving prick and I should reeeeeally bite the bullet and make myself some changa? Or what? Because this whole plastic lifeless void I keep experiencing on moderate doses is becoming quite a pain in the butt.
"A troop of elves smashes down your front door and rotates and balances the wheels on the after death vehicle, present you with the bill and then depart. And it's completely paradigm shattering. I mean, ya know, union with the white light you could handle. An invasion of your apartment by jeweled self dribbling basketballs from hyperspace that are speaking in demonic Greek is NOT something that you anticipated and could handle!' -T.M.


The posts and stories by this member are simply for fictional entertainment purposes only and do not reflect any 'real life' occurrences.
Smile
 

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anrchy
#2 Posted : 7/23/2014 8:26:22 AM

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You could change it up with some harmalas, you could try taking the whole 15 in one hit, maybe try changing the setting or clear your mind more and attempt to stay "thoughtless" and just experience what your being given.

Times like this i try to stick to the same dose and let it hash itself out. Sometimes there's a lesson there that you aren't allowing in because your freakin a bit. Try to relax. I think 15 is my fav size dose, if your getting that experience on half that maybe up it a bit. Try loading only what you want in one hit abd clearing all that.
Open your Mind () Please read my DMT vaping guide () Fear is the mind killer

"Energy flows where attention goes"

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Felnik
#3 Posted : 7/23/2014 1:42:06 PM

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Make yourself some changa, change your setting.
For me there has to be some positive signs at lower doses
for me to push harder. Bad initial feelings in most cases can only get
magnified at higher dose levels. Now not always but often enough
to warrant caution in my book. A pretty good approach in light
of your plasticville experience would be to slowly ramp up with caapi
leaf. I think you need to rebuild your trust level at this point . Going
balls to the wall is not the answer although there is a time and a place
for that . There is a good reason why the shamans use dmt in conjunction
with ayahuasca so I try to stick to that concept because it works . There's
deeper meaning to be found this way ultimately.

The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible.
Arthur C. Clarke


http://vimeo.com/32001208
 
HumbleTraveler
#4 Posted : 7/24/2014 6:33:50 PM

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anrchy wrote:
You could change it up with some harmalas, you could try taking the whole 15 in one hit, maybe try changing the setting or clear your mind more and attempt to stay "thoughtless" and just experience what your being given.

Times like this i try to stick to the same dose and let it hash itself out. Sometimes there's a lesson there that you aren't allowing in because your freakin a bit. Try to relax. I think 15 is my fav size dose, if your getting that experience on half that maybe up it a bit. Try loading only what you want in one hit abd clearing all that.


Great points, I was doing that for some time I was doing only about 8mg and doing one hitters but it really didnt seem to be doing much of anything besides light CEV's that were over in under 2 minutes.

Felnik wrote:
Make yourself some changa, change your setting.
For me there has to be some positive signs at lower doses
for me to push harder. Bad initial feelings in most cases can only get
magnified at higher dose levels. Now not always but often enough
to warrant caution in my book. A pretty good approach in light
of your plasticville experience would be to slowly ramp up with caapi
leaf. I think you need to rebuild your trust level at this point . Going
balls to the wall is not the answer although there is a time and a place
for that . There is a good reason why the shamans use dmt in conjunction
with ayahuasca so I try to stick to that concept because it works . There's
deeper meaning to be found this way ultimately.



Im definitely looking into adding in caapi, Ive been reading a lot about changa. I only have about 400mg of spice left right now. It seems like most people make change with like 1g of spice and 1g of botanicals.

Can I make myself changa with what I have left? Other issue is I dont have a bonga for my changa. I only have a GVG.
"A troop of elves smashes down your front door and rotates and balances the wheels on the after death vehicle, present you with the bill and then depart. And it's completely paradigm shattering. I mean, ya know, union with the white light you could handle. An invasion of your apartment by jeweled self dribbling basketballs from hyperspace that are speaking in demonic Greek is NOT something that you anticipated and could handle!' -T.M.


The posts and stories by this member are simply for fictional entertainment purposes only and do not reflect any 'real life' occurrences.
Smile
 
anrchy
#5 Posted : 7/25/2014 12:06:34 AM

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You could also make some stronger caapi and smoke it before you vape the freebase
Open your Mind () Please read my DMT vaping guide () Fear is the mind killer

"Energy flows where attention goes"

[Please review the forum Wiki and FAQ before posting questions]
 
#6 Posted : 7/25/2014 1:38:59 AM
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HumbleTraveler wrote:
I was made of plastic, like I no longer existed, and that the concept I believe as "me" did not exist, never did exist, and that Im really just the imagination of myself.


Beautiful isn't it, yet sometimes horrifyingly so? The indescribable is-ness that permeates every facet of our single-ness and yet encompasses all. It only makes sense when we stop trying to marginalize it, attemtping to fragment and box up our birthright. We rest in undressed being remembering to remember that 'it' and us have never been apart.

HumbleTraveler wrote:
Has anyone else encountered a scenario like this frequently? Is this "standard"? I really had a very clear mind and had no negative thoughts coming into it. The identical experience happened months and months ago and I feel as though I had come to terms with it and if it happened again, I would just ride it out and be ok with it. But the in the moment feeling is SO unbelievably intense and overwhelming I just cant seem to shake it and tell myself, "this is the most powerful hallucinogen, just relax and ride it out".


Nothings standard when it comes to this. Rationale, you, pre-conceived notions, thoughts, feelings of feelings, ideas of what you considered to be your solidarity, ALL go out the window. Id be worried if people weren't experiencing this realization at some point. The 'in the moment feeling'....hehe.....thats all there is. We never left....we never left.

HumbleTraveler wrote:
Is it the fact that freebase is just an unforgiving prick and I should reeeeeally bite the bullet and make myself some changa? Or what? Because this whole plastic lifeless void I keep experiencing on moderate doses is becoming quite a pain in the butt.


The only unfortunate prick is our egoic tendencies as self-assuming linear creatures with self - physical object realtionship to assume that thats all there is, and where we stand. There is much more friend, much more than we could ever grasp or understand. Changa will afford you no relief, because with a sufficient dose, you will hit this same realization, to a more-or-less degree at some point or another if your steadfast in your approach. While the RIMAs will impart some 'processing capabilities' due to slowing the 'ebb n flow of all-that-is' down to a somewhat more manageable level of interpretation, the experience will still be there, every bit as intense, right in your face, letting that self-assumed man inside of yourself 'know' that you never were and never will be, your not going anywhere apart from this moment and never will. Blessed be!

Take joy in this, bath in it, celebrate the supreme magnificence that abides equally alongside the terrifying prospect of being forever locked into a boundless falling. There is love at the core, i'll tell you that. A ravenous horrifyingly ruthless compassion, it watches from every face, every child, every bird, every blade of grass, every galaxy, every supernova, every piece of dust, all but a breath in the eye of the infinite. Our helplessly dancing against the backdrop of our true nature, forever more.

Pleased

much love


 
DreaMTripper
#7 Posted : 7/25/2014 8:45:28 AM

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^Great post.
 
Global
#8 Posted : 7/25/2014 11:31:18 AM

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It's interesting how we process things differently because I've had numerous occasions where the outside world looks like it turns to plastic, but I've always found it to be an actually pleasing aesthetic, and it hasn't been accompanied by thoughts like I'm the product of my own imagination. Sometimes the experience just doesn't "connect" and it can be difficult to say why, but it should seem that the setting down to minute details like the spatial relation of you to your immediate surroundings can have a big hand in either facilitating or disconnecting an experience. I don't typically journey with music, but my recommendation would be that if you're feeling stuck, and static, and need to stay a bit grounded, would be to listen to some good music while you're journeying...something that you would also like sober. Hyperspace might just thank you for it.
"Science without religion is lame. Religion without science is blind" - Albert Einstein

"The Mighty One appears, the horizon shines. Atum appears on the smell of his censing, the Sunshine- god has risen in the sky, the Mansion of the pyramidion is in joy and all its inmates are assembled, a voice calls out within the shrine, shouting reverberates around the Netherworld." - Egyptian Book of the Dead

"Man fears time, but time fears the Pyramids" - 9th century Arab proverb
 
Handel
#9 Posted : 7/25/2014 12:35:09 PM

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Quote:
I felt like I was made of plastic, like I no longer existed, and that the concept I believe as "me" did not exist, never did exist, and that Im really just the imagination of myself.


Maybe DMT is trying to show you the reality of things. You ARE the imagination of yourself. This reality is an illusion, an experiment in the mind of a larger Being. You (and all the rest of us) are this Being. So maybe DMT shows you this over and over until you have accepted that your "character" in this world, and everything else in this virtual reality, is not really real.

It shows as plastic because in our Earthly preconceptions, when we want to think of something as "fake", we think of plastic. In the altered states, we understand and are shown things via types of allegories that our human consciousness are accustomed to. So in this case, our "fake world and ego" is shown to you via the understanding of "plastic world".

So personally, if I were in your position, I think I wouldn't take the advice of some of the people here who suggest changing the chemical composition of your high, in order to avoid this vision. I think what needs to be done is to try to understand the meaning of the vision, do more research about it (read some books about it, do some meditation etc), and when you have understood and accepted the message, then I think DMT (or whatever is controlling what DMT shows you) will let you progress. But it seems important, given the persistence of the vision, to understand and accept the message. Don't try to avoid and go around it.
 
Purges
#10 Posted : 7/25/2014 1:14:01 PM

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The part of this that stood out to me was not that everything turned plastic, but your response. This is the message and where you should be looking to put in the work. Why can't you calm yourself? Why can't you just observe, even if it's not the rainbows and butterflies you might have hoped for? How can you expect to delve into deeper realms if this level is causing panic? Harmalas could help. Changa is a great tool, but you still need to be prepared to accept and surrender. I have been working on my own courage issues myself lately, I think that's why this stood out to me.

A longer acting psychedelic like lsd might help process such feelings before going back. There are many ways up the mountain Smile
Lose Control, Free My Soul, Break Me Open, Make Me Whole.
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Handel
#11 Posted : 7/25/2014 1:23:18 PM

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I agree with Purges. This is a very good point he raises. If the simple truth of "everything is virtual" causes you distress, then you can't, and shouldn't progress on the other DMT levels. I think knowledge about the fundamentals of the universes (in plural) and consciousness as the driving force behind these virtual universes, must be attained, understood and accepted first. At least in your case (or so DMT thinks so).

I would highly recommend the book "My Big Toe", which has helped me too a lot.
 
twofourtwo
#12 Posted : 7/25/2014 8:18:53 PM

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I think I experienced this a couple of times, on low doses. I always thought this was what is known as "candyland" ?

Quote:

Candyland

The visual of a pristine polished "enhanced" open eyed reality.


https://wiki.dmt-nexus.me/Hyperspace_lexicon#Candyland
 
Al-Wasi
#13 Posted : 7/25/2014 8:32:39 PM

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I've had this same omg this is to intense feeling on DMT my past few sessions. Usually accompanied by a entity which I can't see that seems to be messing with my head .

This plastic look you speak of I've seen on other sessions and I really enjoy it. Generally what gives me the omg this is too intense resistance you speak of is when a trip takes on a dark tone or one where something seems to be purposely messing with my head. Then I automatically go back to my difficult LSD trips where it seemed like I'd never come down. I fear I'm gonna be stuck dealing with a difficult trip for what seems like forever. I've tripped so many times I know I'll coem back and it will end. Its the fact I know its possible in these states to feel as if your never going to come back and the time distortion making negative feelings seem like forever that gets me.

As they say, at least for me, there's nothing to fear but fear itself. I know I'll come down and looking back none of this stuff is really anything to fear. Its me not wanting to be in the state or feeling stuck forever that colors and ruins trips for me I think. I myself have lots of work to do to figure out why I cant relax and enjoy it. I love the visuals I love the experience but those one or two really difficult LSD trips where I literally thought I had just gone too far to come back and scared the hell out of me still to this day effect me.
That moment when you wonder if this time you went too far....

Obviously everything discussed here is the fictional accounts of someone with an out there imagination. I mean really could any of these tales be real?
 
anrchy
#14 Posted : 7/26/2014 12:19:21 AM

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Again this is why i say to change things up a bit. I have many a time, found it difficult to deal with the anxiety of that i would get going in. Harmalas helps a lot. Change something in your dosing regimen. Listening to music before and during helped me immensely.
Open your Mind () Please read my DMT vaping guide () Fear is the mind killer

"Energy flows where attention goes"

[Please review the forum Wiki and FAQ before posting questions]
 
SpartanII
#15 Posted : 7/26/2014 12:39:49 AM

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HumbleTraveler wrote:
Re-occuring lifeless, synethtic minecraft like open eye environment



Quote:
I only slightly lost it this time, its such an intensely overwhelming feeling that I literally CAN NOT calm myself. I was like OKAY Im just going to get up and go inside. All I feel is like I was watching everything on my street turn to plastic. The trees, the car across the street, the house, everything just became lifeless and fake looking. I felt like I was made of plastic, like I no longer existed, and that the concept I believe as "me" did not exist, never did exist, and that Im really just the imagination of myself. I jumped up from the chair from being overcome by this environment and feeling like I was scrambling to make the trip end by looking for something that looked familiar. Luckily within a minute, everything was back to almost normal.


Quote:
I really had a very clear mind and had no negative thoughts coming into it.


It's not just the surface thoughts that can affect a trip, sometimes it's subconscious thought/energy. Just something to think about.Thumbs up

I have no idea what Mincraft is but it sounds like you were having a spiritual battle of trying to hold onto your ego during the trip. Pretty typical stuff when it comes to this molecule, but it does manifest in different ways for different people...
 
Viperoid
#16 Posted : 7/26/2014 8:04:20 AM

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Quote:
Beautiful isn't it, yet sometimes horrifyingly so? The indescribable is-ness that permeates every facet of our single-ness and yet encompasses all. It only makes sense when we stop trying to marginalize it, attemtping to fragment and box up our birthright. We rest in undressed being remembering to remember that 'it' and us have never been apart.

Nothings standard when it comes to this. Rationale, you, pre-conceived notions, thoughts, feelings of feelings, ideas of what you considered to be your solidarity, ALL go out the window. Id be worried if people weren't experiencing this realization at some point. The 'in the moment feeling'....hehe.....thats all there is. We never left....we never left.


The only unfortunate prick is our egoic tendencies as self-assuming linear creatures with self - physical object realtionship to assume that thats all there is, and where we stand. There is much more friend, much more than we could ever grasp or understand. Changa will afford you no relief, because with a sufficient dose, you will hit this same realization, to a more-or-less degree at some point or another if your steadfast in your approach. While the RIMAs will impart some 'processing capabilities' due to slowing the 'ebb n flow of all-that-is' down to a somewhat more manageable level of interpretation, the experience will still be there, every bit as intense, right in your face, letting that self-assumed man inside of yourself 'know' that you never were and never will be, your not going anywhere apart from this moment and never will. Blessed be!

Take joy in this, bath in it, celebrate the supreme magnificence that abides equally alongside the terrifying prospect of being forever locked into a boundless falling. There is love at the core, i'll tell you that. A ravenous horrifyingly ruthless compassion, it watches from every face, every child, every bird, every blade of grass, every galaxy, every supernova, every piece of dust, all but a breath in the eye of the infinite. Our helplessly dancing against the backdrop of our true nature, forever more.


i am totally agree with "Tattvamasi".

I think thats what the spice is. In the core of the event thats what it shows. Its not like a ticket for 4 dimensonal awesome movie. It is not a thing that to be usefull for happy mood or beauty. Its shows this thing either it is good or bad for you. That depends on you.

Thaths why i dont belive that using changa will change this . It will help you to feel this more easily altough.
Impossible is just for ignorant fools
 
Al-Wasi
#17 Posted : 7/26/2014 9:59:23 AM

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Viperoid???? Why don't you think changa will help and what do you mean by it will help you see it more easily? I'm under the impression that changa is a more grounded experience and can help some eight he sheer intensity of vaping pure crystal spice.

The whole changa thing is a odd thing as some say its more grounded an some say its more intense and difficult then just crystal. Guess I'll know where I stand in a few days as I'm about to take the plunge with my first changa session.
That moment when you wonder if this time you went too far....

Obviously everything discussed here is the fictional accounts of someone with an out there imagination. I mean really could any of these tales be real?
 
Viperoid
#18 Posted : 7/26/2014 10:54:07 AM

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wakeup wrote:
Viperoid???? Why don't you think changa will help and what do you mean by it will help you see it more easily? I'm under the impression that changa is a more grounded experience and can help some eight he sheer intensity of vaping pure crystal spice.

The whole changa thing is a odd thing as some say its more grounded an some say its more intense and difficult then just crystal. Guess I'll know where I stand in a few days as I'm about to take the plunge with my first changa session.



well i think that because it is more easy to breakthrough with changa. When a traveler breaks through i think there would be high possibility to feel what OP feels.
But this just my experiences .My thoughs could be wrong also since effects are very person dependent
Impossible is just for ignorant fools
 
HumbleTraveler
#19 Posted : 7/27/2014 8:00:55 PM

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Thanks for the responses everyone, I need to take some time to really read all of them in depth and reply specifically.

Quickly though, Ill comment on the plasticness and imagination of myself part that I spoke of. In that regard I think I worded all of that wrong. Its something Ive been a firm preacher in for a long time. That nothing is truly real, everything is illusory, and we realy ARE the imagination of "ourselves".

So in that regard, Im fully aware of the role the self plays in thinking it exists, while not even existing at the same time.

And yes too, it really is very beautiful being able to see these things unfold and observe consciousness totally warp and watch everything just re-illustrate itself in the blink of an eye. The fact that it IS literally the most frightening thing Ive ever experienced is truly fascinating, and it is helping in a way.

But my sole biggest problem with it is the feeling that Im dying and that I may have crossed a line that will not allow me to return to "normal". If that makes sense.

I know I need to tell myself that this is just the stuff doing its thing. BUT, it really is just a ridiculous feeling to me. Its totally transformative and it happens so hard and so fast that I feel like theres no time to acclimate, its jsut BOOM EVERYTHING YOU KNOW JUST DIED, BUT THATS OK BECAUSE IT NEVER EXISTED ANYWAY! WELCOME!!

And again, I know that. I really do, but its just such an overpowering, overwhelming, encroaching feeling that takes over. I have no problem with the idea of letting go, but damn. Once you're 'there' its really not so simple lol
"A troop of elves smashes down your front door and rotates and balances the wheels on the after death vehicle, present you with the bill and then depart. And it's completely paradigm shattering. I mean, ya know, union with the white light you could handle. An invasion of your apartment by jeweled self dribbling basketballs from hyperspace that are speaking in demonic Greek is NOT something that you anticipated and could handle!' -T.M.


The posts and stories by this member are simply for fictional entertainment purposes only and do not reflect any 'real life' occurrences.
Smile
 
HumbleTraveler
#20 Posted : 7/29/2014 9:48:20 AM

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*Thank you Tattvamasi for the words. Im truly on a path to seek the unfathomable realms. I shoudl have worded better, the issue Im facing isnt so much the enviornment Im seeing...but the overwhelming feeling of seeing the world be changed so intensely and so fast. Its the comeup thats really shocking my system. I embrace seeing and finding newness. It's really the panic on the immense come up that I cant seem to calm. Im 5 seconds into holding my breath and it's just full steam ahead. It's amazing but at the same time just such a disconnected feeling. The way that everything transforms into intense blocks of visuals. Linearity yields to jumpy visual frames, body movements seem robotic and glitchy.

Would you or anyone have any tips for really grounding myself IN that moment? Would it be better with some friends around to help keep the atmosphere positive? My concern is seeing my friends potentially turn to plastic bricks might send me a little over the edge haha.


*Global good call on the music. That might really add some grounding force to the experience and overall positivity.

*Purges yes I do have Mescaline on standby and also am very willing to try shrooms at a moderate dose. I think it could help big time at least in terms of perspective. Im aware reading others experiences that nothing really can compare to a DMT experience. Id believe that haha.


*Wakeup what you said really hit the nail on the head. My issue is the extremely dark overtone the whole experiences undertakes. It's truly an encroaching feeling with a very intense undertone. Exactly what you said about time distortions and the overall negativity tied in with it that I will be stuck in this timeless eternity and will not be able to come down from it is what makes it seem so bad.

I am going to attempt today to head back in and see if I can make some progress with the whole situation. I really just want to be able to experience this scenario and learn from it.
"A troop of elves smashes down your front door and rotates and balances the wheels on the after death vehicle, present you with the bill and then depart. And it's completely paradigm shattering. I mean, ya know, union with the white light you could handle. An invasion of your apartment by jeweled self dribbling basketballs from hyperspace that are speaking in demonic Greek is NOT something that you anticipated and could handle!' -T.M.


The posts and stories by this member are simply for fictional entertainment purposes only and do not reflect any 'real life' occurrences.
Smile
 
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