I haven't had LSD in a long time and i wanted to share with my friends to show them what its all about and the situation finally presented itself and we decided okay we will do it today and see how it goes.

Me personally, i was very excited, my friends on the other hand never tried it before were bit anxious but also curious so we decided to do half then go to the bar for 30-60 minutes then see how we feel for the 2nd half.

All was good, we went for a long walk to the bar and chilled there for a while and everything was great, it was kicking in. My two friends were double my weight so i assume this is why i noticed it before them and i always felt slightly more intense than they were feeling. By the time we got back they enjoyed the buzz so they decided to take the second half with me and it started to get quite intense quite fast and the whole 2-3 hours so far was all giggles and uncontrollable laughter, we pretty much laughed all the way back home and continue to do so for a while.

As the second half started to kick in more my friends started to feel bored in the house chilling out listening to music they are more outgoing people so they wanted to do things, where i like to communicate more and feel and connect with the experience. This is where i felt they weren't really on my level because they actually wanted to go out to the local bar, socialize have a few drinks and play some games ect..

I felt really uncomfortable going there because from past experiences with LSD people that were around me not on it while i was felt completely awkward and alien to me, as if they are all more tripping than me as i could feel vibes, at this stage faces were warping and smiles and cartoon like effects were kicking in, vibrations, colors, fractals and sounds were on a crazy loop, i could feel and sense EVERYTHING so intensely but my friends didn't wanna stay nor listen to me cause they felt bad leaving me so they convinced me to go and at that point all i could do is say ah well just ride along with it i guess what else can i do.

The cab ride felt like a warping rollercoaster, 5 minutes drive felt like 35 and finally we got there. Very busy, people out, on the streets, all over, noises, cars the whole package but as usual i didn't wanna ruin my friends experiences so i just tried to go with the flow and ride with it, how bad could it be, oh boy it was intense.

Soon as we entered the bar, it was like i stepped into an alternative reality or into some twisted bar in the middle of nowhere soon as i stepped through the door, everything changed, not in a bad way at first but more like i was playing a game and just entered a new level.

As we wondered in the more busy areas of the bar it started to get really weird, i felt awkward and uneasy to sit or stand anywhere, all sorts of people and strange vibes around me and all the noises and sounds were hitting me hard and everyone's face was warping and changing shapes and bodies would elongate, felt like the whole bar was looking at me but the worst thing about it was it felt like everyone there besides my mates were so alien and strange to us especially me. I felt like i couldn't breath in there because i could feel the vibes, feel the noises and other senses all hitting me throughout my whole body and almost thought i was going to spin out and or pass out so i decided to go outside and get some fresh air.

My friends were obviously in a less intense wave then me because they were handling it much better and didn't really experience any warping or effects i was when asked them later but then again they are more in their nature out there with the world while im more introspective. It almost felt like they couldn't sit at home because they needed a void to fill and going out and socializing was their way of filling the void but it didn't work for me at all.

I couldn't go in there any longer, it felt too weird and other friends i would see i couldn't talk to them properly because they seemed so alien to me, i could communicate but i felt strange vibes off them like they were more tripping than me. Eventually we agreed to call a cab for me back home cause i felt it was the best thing to do and they returned to the bar with the rest for 3-4 hours and had a great time.

I thought when i get home at least i can be with myself, calm myself down, put on music and flow with it where i usually find the magic in LSD and all the answers of the universe are there but it wasn't like that at all.

(In my first experience with a another close friend it was only us two and we stayed in the house all night till morning and it was an amazing bonding and rewarding/learning experience, we had all the answers to life's problems, we laughed, we talked about deep spiritual realizations and about the universe at one point it felt like it was only us in this whole universe and we had become gods and it felt like MDMA x 100 at some moments, eventually it did get to the intense part but it was bliss all the way through, it wasn't as visually challenging, it was crystal clear, the warping and stuff didn't bother me at all, everything was beautiful, everything was complete and like a playground, i had become a child full of love and freedom again. We did see my friends brothers pop in and out but they didn't effect us one bit or bother us as we were so amazed and what we were experiencing.)

Now back to the recent experience, i could get none of that magic back, im sure i felt if i was alone i can go deeper and connect to that magic again but it wasn't happening, i was still in that very uneasy loop of madness for another 2 hours until i started to do some yoga/stretching and tai chi and move a bit and called my ex and talked to her for a bit, all these things put me in a slightly higher/happier state but still no where near where i was before where i saw the world play out in front of me and i am able to read between all the lines and see the wonder of life.

Eventually my friends came back and i felt slightly better with them again up in a happier state than before because they just talked shit and it was constant laughter so atleast that made me feel better, we went for walks at night but being just us and the fresh cool air i felt much better, eventually had some weed and passed out and woke up the next day very refreshed but slightly disappointing.

All in all i wouldn't say it was a bad trip that i know of, i didn't panic and go insane, i just had very intense and challenging moments of mind loops/warps and slightly paranoid moments. It did teach me a few things about life and these experiences and whats more important to life and gave me a refreshing look to life even though i didn't get all those realizations i expected but i do feel good and refreshed, I'm definitely gonna start getting my health and mindset better again, probably start meditating, finding my balance and connecting to more like-minds, letting go of things that no longer serve me ect..

Thanks for reading, i would love to hear your opinions and tips i could use for the future because i enjoy psychedelics, i definitely would like to have them every once in a while and remember what life's about and share these experiences with others. If you have any tips on what i should do next time or why this went the way it did please feel free to share your thoughts. Slightly more anxious to try mushrooms or LSD alone now :S

Thanks again

Wisdomtooth, keep it simple. Read the forum and never forget set and setting a few changes to personnel with you and relaxed meditation at home maybe alone or with a sitter.
Tripping in your average bar sounds hellish to me!
It didn't go full "bad trip beckons" did it? So look at it as an experience you succeded in performing mental yoga and survived.
After 500-850mikes one night last week I needed someome to stay with me for a few days so it happens to all of us psychonauts at times. And mixing alcohol into the brew sends me beserk.
Don't beat yourself up!! Consider going it alone in an environment you are in control of.

Kind regards

Ey, I'm a loner like you. (i've never even tripped off of LSD with one other person) I can sympathize with the feeling of strange vibes on strangers. I remember on a hit of LSD sitting out front of my appartment and looking at the people traveling by and their facial expressions make me feel uncomfortable. Agony, Awkwardness. And under the influence I feel 'perfect' so I can not understand those feelings at the time. Like you, Also when my friend (who was sober) came to greet me everything felt normal. I can see how tripping with my friend would result in this 'fairy tail LSD trip' that you talk about. While these strangers give strange vibes to me. I think it has a lot to do with having a bond and connection. Once a connection is formed between two people usually all sorrow disappears from their faces for a while. ("The void is filled so to speak "

But there's a deeper layer that I see now. You can express yourself beautifully and perfectly in the comfort of a nice set and setting. But the situation is that the whole world isn't so safe to trip in. This is a problem that needs fixing. I use the word 'suffering' to describe it generally but that doesn't entail the whole situation. The whole population and material wrold isn't bonded in 'love' perhaps? Therefore, you feel disconnected and dizy. This could just be the effects of LSD but I don't think it has to be this 'harsh' that you become unconscious for the world. In a perfect world you go into LSD space and into the real world fluently and comfortably.

Hope that is of service ^_^ BYE

Ahoi WisdomTooth, thank you for sharing your experience and this..



.. sound really benefical to me.


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Learning how to move in fields of relationships while being at my own center, seems to be crucial in our lifes.
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It is us, our (un)conscious believes (about us, the others and the world) which trigger our emotional and behavioural response (in every moment, even now!).

Why do these impressions, the expression of others and what so ever, trigger that in me? What is it what makes me feel uncomfortable, what do I fear? Being criticized, being wrong and thus maybe rejected?


There is no reason to get excited. Imagine, you are the captain on a small fisherboat and you are on your way back home. Therefore you have to sail through a storm. Which behaviour seems helpful in this situation? Keep a clear mind, stay focused and travel home safe.


"Love" can mean understanding, "love" can be/bring the connection itself, by letting it be how it is.


Do I feel bonded in "love"?


What is my contribution? Furthermore, the idea of a "perfect world or perfect self" to achieve, which is not now already, is the result of my own unwillingness to fully let go. I am part of it all, it is all ours, we are now and this is it! Welcome brothers & sisters!

Question my believes (what do I really know and what is an assumption, based on what? - emotions are no reason that an assumption is right! - Most believes are based on heuristics!), keep focus and stay in the now. Monkeymind can be trained.

All the best to us, tseuq

Greeting fellow sailor tseuq. Let me try a hand in responding adequately to parts of ur reply. I'd like to say I am very pleased to see ur response so quickly.



Btw, this incentive struck me as slightly odd. It seems to imply that the whole problem for the experience is inside WisdomTooth's consciousness.

While the issue of connecting with people is one of mutual relationship. i.e. his friends could have done a better job in including him into the experience.

Ur quote explains the solution perfectly. Something I have major issues with. Being isolated for most of my life with only small intervals of companionship. Finding a strategy for balance while moving through countless of social relationships is worth gold. This is exactly where I feel my destiny is headed.



Tbh, with fear of sounding argumentative; Realizing my surrounding stranger people are fearful themselves. Makes me uncomfortable about the place that I live in. Seeing the sea I swim in is in agony makes me question the positivity of the place I live in. Hope that makes sense.



I love it when my mind can sing about the riders on the storm.



Yes
Understanding forms a bridge. From being alienated to becoming familiair with what you understand. Thus, bringing each other closer, right.


I can not answer this. I think in ur relationships you do. In your safe surroundings you do. If you travel to mexican drug cartels you might not feel bonded in love. While mexican druglords might feel safe in the surrounding they understand. With the people they 'trust'. The police on the other hand they do not trust or love. They won't hesitate to kill each other or vice versa.
All social situations in different caliber express the same kind of hierarchy.





Is it?

Do you have experience that might help for me to further understand ur statement?

I would agree mostly. The perfect world is achieved now in this moment. But we are far from perfect. People as a whole are on average; imperfect. To say the least.

There are moments of perfection. But they are short and uncommon.

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I like to concur to Buddhist philosophy and say the problem in the world consists of suffering. (i am in a hurry, I think) The greatest contribution one can give is to alleviate all suffering in one's self. And then gravitate towards alleviating suffering in the surrounding population.

..

I hope the emotions with which I have responded with serves the intentions with which you intented to formulate a reply.

To be continued

Ahoi Infectedstyle


It is meant as an amplification of the conclusions WisdomTooth stated in the op, which s/he seems to draw from the experience.


I guess, theoretically, yes.


I hope.





My question refers on an intrapersonal level, to the relationship which I can/do have with myself. Do I feel "love" and acceptance, which I wish to feel from others, for myself? Sometimes we might have hard times with ourselves, reproducing, mostly in early childhood learned, "relationship-"patterns in the need of validation, recognition and appreciation. The idea of "I" might bring up various thought-emotion-behaviour-loops, which can be pretty enganging.


Yes.. haha. It seems that this is at least what I can tell from the story I experience. Otherwise I maybe wouldn't even post on the original quote.

Love, tseuq

I don't know. Thanks for replying

I forgot to say, the storm 'on which we sail'

I misunderstood ur question, now that you formulate it like that; [The answer is the same. Do you understand yourself in such a way that you love yourself. Do you yourself love ur actions. Something tells me if you love the actions you do, it is universally accepted and loved. I agree the need for validation need not to be looked for elsewhere. Something a lot of people have considerable trouble understanding.

PS: I think perhaps not understanding one's role in social situations such as OP results in losing orientation? Would you agree?
PS2: I might add this is surely not limited to social situations only. One can lose orientation or have an orientation without the need for social.

Meditation is perfect for this practice.

Hope that makes sense. ttyl

BTW: Would you be interested in reading a 1300 mics trip i've had?

To me, "love", in this context, means acceptance and understanding, it dissolves the idea of self. There just is. I am part of it, am it (nothing), now, unseparable from the whole in every moment and I guess I am consequence. What ever that means.

The love I share with others, is the love I share with myself.

tseuq