It has been a while since my last deep journey with DMT. To be honest, I have been afraid. My last few attempts over the past months were filled with dark, unclear, and confusing visions that left me feeling unfulfilled. I was often visited by entities with ill intent that tried to enter my space or convince me that they were God. So unconsciously, I had put up resistance and my own personal hyperspace blockade.

I just recently finished a fresh batch of Changa, and had my mind set on this October full moon for a ceremony. This time I would do it right.

I fasted all day (minus a few grapes), mentally prepared myself and once I got home from work I made the necessary preparations. It was about 9 PM.

I sometimes have my girlfriend sit in the room and hold the space for me while I journey, so we both meditated in the dark. I then loaded up an unknown amount of changa in the bong and took a few deep breaths, asking my guides to be with me and help protect me. I remind myself that no matter what happens, I am in control of my space and that if I come across anything negative than I would confront it with love.

My heart is pounding, and I begin. I burn the bowl slow and concentrated. I feel the channel changing, and I decide to rip the rest of it. I take an overly HOT lung-full of smoke and choke hard. I cough for a couple minutes and once I am able to relax my lungs I notice the tryptamine walls and palace, dimly peaking through the darkness behind my closed eyes. Once again I am sadly wafting through the outskirts of hyperspace bliss, weaving my way through hypnogogic Egyptian style figures and all-seeing-eyes…

I begin breathing slowly and calmly, focusing my attention on the present. I use this time to move energy from my body releasing felt blocks. My Kundalini is rushing to my forehead and through my hands, indicating that I am to use them. I am like a puppeteer, pulling strings, directing, regulating my body and spirit. I feel totally locked in - one with the inward and outward breath of the universe.

I am, however, unfulfilled and disappointed yet again.

Now that my heart has quit pounding and my lungs are calm and easy, I meditate, and load up another bowl of Changa.

This time I am much more tranquil. I slowly vaporize the sweet smelling medicine, allowing my perception to change ever so smoothly this time. I am in pitch dark and the embers look like dazzling flowers of fire, gently shining light on the moment. The jungle vision kicks in after the second rip, and the 3rd I’m surprised to see that my hands have become like that of a reptile – scaly, blue, and wet.

“Oh boy..”

I take one last glorious rip, the remainder of the bowl, and hold it in as long as I can. Upon exhalation, eyes wide open, everything around me becomes vibrant, and the walls of my room become ethereal, endless, the boarders of shadowed paintings in my room become impossibly colorful and held a depth that normal human eyes could never conceive.

Everything has life, movement, infinite depth.

There is a bright-blue like light that fills the room from a central point on my wall in front of me. The physical dissolves into the spiritual.

I have only felt compelled to keep my eyes open a handful of times while smoking spice but this time I had to keep them open.

I am laughing, that special kind of laugh, that only comes from deep within while in the depths of psychedelic bliss. I hold up my arms and move them and to my surprise, I can see them perfectly in the dark! Though they are not made of skin, my arms have become shadowy, wispy, ghostlike and delicate. I make a triangle with my hands and move them in different Mudras, which produced an exciting energetic flow in the space behind, sometimes like a wormhole, all-the-while focusing intently on keeping a steady breath. I feel connected to everything and my breath, in and out, is an orgasmic, loving embrace for my soul.

I am manipulating energy in a full range of color spectrum, right in front of my open eyes. I close my eyes excitedly now to see where I go, but to my surprise, I am confronted with the exact same thing I am seeing with open eyes.

WOW. This is incredible.

I realize now that what I am being shown is the malleability of our physical realm, re-affirming the gnosis of illusion in my mind.

Appalled, I keep them open again, hardly blinking, because I know this will wear off soon.

But it doesn’t wear off. I am outside of time. I am still in my room, strangely, but my room had become a brightly illuminated room of magic! And I am the magician!

A voice tells me “You always have this power. It is held deep within you.”

“What will I do with it?”

I look down at my body and I am no longer human. I am beautiful. Magnifiscent. Adorned in light. My skin has become blue, effulgent, with a thin layer of all-colored translucent smoke gently surrounding my body. My aura?

“You are beautiful. You are always beautiful. Your body is sacred.”

I am glowing. I feel like a super saiyan.

I come to the sudden realization that I am embodying something greater, something pure and close to my heart. It sounds strange to say it, and I do so with the utmost humility, but in the moment I felt like I was a god, or demi-god. Or could I be embodying Krishna?

Whatever I had become was indistinguishably something of pure light. I felt like I had done it, I had entered the realm of the divine and somehow ‘become’ a god.

No longer than a fraction of a millisecond after this thought came in, a rush of hot red energy heaved through my entire body from toe to head, and I was overwhelmed with an indescribable sensation of POWER. This power was unlike anything else I have ever felt in my life. It overtook me in my entirety with a lustful and sinister thirst - only to be quenched with more power over others, over planets, over galaxies and universes. I could do whatever I want.

“NO! I don’t want the power! I only wish to live in love!”

My mind raced with repulsion at what I had become and I willed my heart to open. The hotness was cooled and drained out of my 1st chakra until I felt love and bliss again.

I’m moving my arms and my attention comes back to my breath, trying to hold on to the moment. Out loud I express gratitude and invite my girlfriend to come lay with me, for I had just been given one of the most precious gifts of my life.

As I drift back into the physical, a small voice tells me to do more work on opening my heart. I have been living too much in the higher chakras, striving for visionary experience. The mind can corrupt but the heart, at its essence, is pure.

I got what I asked for and so much more.

I am refreshed, renewed, wiser. The vigor for life has returned.


Thanks for reading,
-SM

Very nice trip report! I highly enjoyed reading that! Got goosebumps a couple times even. You are a gifted writer!

The hairs on my arms raised because much of what you described I have experienced myself. I would have to say that one of my favorite feelings in the world is when I close my eyes on dmt and see what I was seeing with eyes open. After a couple of times open and closing my eyes I forget if they are open or shut. Then it comes. Then the experience streams away from the structures of the body. No more eyelids. Something is open. I have another set of eyes. This feeling has tremendous power for me. It is amazing to see in this way.

Thanks for such a great trip report! I love to hear about these kind of experiences!

Happy travels!

Yeah this was a really great report, good read.

Beautiful. Thank you.

That turning point from unfulfilled toward success is intriguing.
At first glance this was a key for the change.

Do you think this kind of 'key' was not present in all those previous sessions that were "...filled with dark, unclear, and confusing visions that left me feeling unfulfilled..."?

Thank you guys so much, I'm glad you enjoyed reading. Writing it out helps me to understand what happened to me, though human linguistics and the english language can be limiting.



It IS amazing... and I think it's necessary for growth that we look through different lenses from time to time (at least for my growth!)
When something like that happens, all you can do is try to take it all in and remember as much as you can.



There were a number of contributing factors to my previous experiences. Smoking technique was one of them, being too hasty was another. I often get so worked up before taking the plunge that it is difficult to stay present, and I end up taking in more than my body could handle resulting in irritated lungs. This experience gave me some insight into how I should go about it -- I will likely smoke a small amount first, come down and calm myself, and then go for the full dose.

These substances bring the subconscious to the conscious, and a few life's situations had worked their way into my psyche, which, in turn produced fear of the unknown. This fear took months to overcome and I often faced many of the fears I had in symbolic hyperspace representations.

I don't denote those past experiences by any means either. They were part of the road I'm on and taught me many lessons leading up to this current experience. Hell, I probably wouldn't have had this experience if it weren't for those difficult times that taught me how differentiate, protect, and utilize in the DMT space.

Intent was probably the number one 'key' factor. I started with the intent that I would be courageous and strong, that I would face whatever came to me, and that I would not give up if I fell short. Ultimately I had to listen to the small voice of my spirit, which gets louder every day. It was guiding me through the whole process, telling me when to light, when to inhale, when to hold, exhale, and eventually to just give in to the experience and enjoy it.

Lovely experience report SM, thanks for sharing it with us!

The reptilian skin phenomena is always fascinating to me, as I have experienced it a couple of times from DMT. Although, instead of blue, I turn a red/orange and seem to be adorned with black, scaly tattoos with imagery I don't/can't seem to recognize. Another strange thing is that when my GF and I eat mushrooms, she says she always sees me as a green reptile sort of human/demon hybrid thing... Anyway, great write up and glad to see you had such a positive experience!

Thanks, TGO

Beautiful♡