After my recent
issues involving all psychedelic compounds, I was led to harmalas. After ingesting any substance before today I would become extremely critical of the world and of myself, even though I consciously knew that "everything was perfect" and "I am a good person." I have come to a point that if I want to peacefully use any psychedelics, I must isolate myself (block vision and hearing) and sink deep into my mind.
I don't really mind these deep, meditative psychedelic states, but it was time for a change. Today, harmalas offered that to me. After a quick session on the chat here to make sure that the organic cheese pizza I ate today wouldn't interfere, I took 50 mg of full spectrum Syrian Rue extract. I did maybe about 30 mg sublingually and 20 mg orally.
Within minutes I was noticeably happier. The smiles came easy, and I had no criticisms whatsoever. Thoughts that would usually make me paranoid made me laugh. A few thoughts of negative things that I have done/witnessed came to me but I was able to work through them. "I am a different person now." It was very nice to be able to think these things to myself and actually mean them rather than feel like I am deceiving myself as I do so often on other psychedelics. The Rue extract experience was subtle yet powerful for me.
After a couple of hours involving playing music, listening to music, reading, and walking around my beautiful neighborhood, I went to my yoga studio to practice Kundalini yoga. Tonight was my first time doing this particular style of yoga and it was mindblowing.
The warm-ups were pretty cool, but near the end the teacher had us meditating and working to move planets with our fingers while doing Breaths of Fire. She was also striking some gongs she had brought and was playing planetary music. And probably for the first time without the use of DMT, I experienced an non-local quantum circuit activation (eighth circuit).
I felt as if my consciousness was propelled into outer space and I was viewing the planets. I also had a brief encounter with an entity who seemed to act as a gatekeeper of the site. My entire body felt lifted out of its shell, as it does with DMT sometimes. Afterward we had a small puja honoring Ganesha which induced further thoughts about DMT journeys, as Ganesha is an initiator to hyperspace for many.
I cannot say if this would have occurred if I did not take the harmalas today, but I suppose I will find out at the session next week. However it feels as if the small dose of Rue extract that I took cleansed away every ounce of depression and doubt that I had inside. The experience was so gentle and near perfect; I really think a lot of people underestimate the power of these!!
Smiles and great feelings are still permeating my body, and I really hope this will last and help me push myself out further in future journeys. Thanks for reading.
"Think for yourself and question authority." - Leary
"To step out of ideology - it hurts. It's a painful experience. You must force yourself to do it." - Žižek