Setting - Backyard, over cast, under large pine trees.
Mind Set - Annoyed. Had a very busy day, constantly dealing with people at work, very little time alone all day. Even upon arriving home for this session, my phone was ringing, my cat's wanted attention, the neighbor was mowing his lawn with a huge loud riding mower. All I wanted was a few minutes of solitude, and the universe was not cooperating.
Up until this point, 15 mg was as far as I have gone. I was intending on dosing 15mg this time around, but as I was weighing it, I went for 18 mg, not thinking to much of it. Considering my scale is relatively cheap, and probably has a margin of error of 2~5 mg, it is entirely likely that this dose ended up being closer to 20+ mg, and considering how much more intense it was then my other 15 mg ish sessions, I think it probably was.
As soon as my neighbors landscaper shut the mower off, I took my chance, and nailed it all in one very dense puff on the GVG.
Immediately I was aware this was going to be more intense then anything I had experienced yet.
It came up to full intensity almost immediately. In the few seconds I had my eyes open after I blew out the hit, I saw the usual open eye visual effects I get begin to take place, but they seemed irrelevant, as I was well aware I was rocketing past the usual effects I get from 10~15 mg.
The last thing I remember about the open eye experience was that the borders of physical objects around me seemed to be vibrating rapidly, as if about to blow apart, something I have only seen to a very small degree before on 15 mg.
I think I closed my eyes around that time, though I later found that the visuals I was experiencing behind closed eyes, were just as apparent with them open; reality was only barely there even with eyes open.
At this point, my visual field was taken over by an ever morphing object, that most closely resembled the animations I have seen of a 4D+ tesseract, or "hypercube" represented in 3D. ( I only found this similarity out after the trip, as I tried to find some way to put into words what I experienced.)
Very much like this;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-WyreE9ZkIBut it was a solid bright yellow / gold, and not transparent. Also it had a more rounded / smoothed appearance, not really straight lines, but the motion of it, and the morphing of one "side" or "face" of it into itself and back out again, and the changing of shape, was very much what I was experiencing. I felt like I was actually seeing it in 4d+
This object became all there was, and all I was. It was not just a visual experience, it was sound, it was physical sensation, it was everything that existed in that moment. Any thought I had, seemed to somehow be it, or incorporated into it, or just get swallowed up by it.
I still had some sense of "I" though, as I recall thinking momentarily that, if anything were happening around me in the physical reality, I would likely be unaware of it, completely oblivious to anything that was happening around me (whether or not that was entirely true I don't know). The multi-dimensional tesseract consumed my full attention, to the point that I felt like I simply would not be able to respond in any meaningful way to anything else.
I recall in the peak of this, while everything was so un-familiar, and I was barely aware that I was still something physical, an occasional breeze would blow across my face, and I would realize that I was still there, sitting in my backyard, a physical human, with a face that can feel the wind blowing across it. This was a very reassuring and comforting feeling.
As the peak went on, I began to notice that one "side" of the many sided morphing tesseract, had some kind of an image or symbol on it. I recall it being bright red and white, in contrast to the glowing yellow/gold of the object itself.
I would see it flash on one "side" of the object, as that side morphed out and back into itself, over and over. I would see the tesseract morph in and out of its multiple glowing yellow sides, then this one side would come through again, with that symbol on it, and just like before it would morph back in again.
The motion of this object was quite rapid, so it was hard to really get an idea what that red and white symbol was.
In addition, at the time, I felt like I knew what it was, as if it was something I was projecting or injecting into the experience. I felt the need to not acknowledge it, as if that would be putting energy into something I brought into the experience, and not just letting the experience happen, and going with the flow. At the time, I felt that was the right answer, but it continued to flash up as the object morphed through its sides.
After the fact, I wish I would have not "rejected" that symbol or image, I wish I had analyzed it more, but at the time, it just felt wrong to think about what that symbol or image was, or to even acknowledge it to some degree.
Around this time, it began winding down, and I was quite glad for that.
I had some kind of general feeling during this experience of being flooded with information from the object, information that I can't really use right now, or maybe ever. It feels like the information is well beyond what I can understand, and that the one part of the information I perhaps could have understood (the symbol), I consciously rejected.
The general feeling I get from 10-15 mg is usually a deep relaxation and inner peace, this was more of a roller coaster ride, that left me feeling like I had been somewhat ran through the "inter-dimensional wringer" not in a bad way, but in a very different way then I am used to at 10 - 15 mg.
For the next half hour, I walked around my house verbally saying aloud to myself "Holy Shit!", "Oh My God!", and "What the fuck!", in every possible combination, in an almost triumphant way, as I tried to wrap my head around what I just experienced.
I am still trying to wrap my head around it 3 days later, quite the experience!
Thanks for reading!
"If you wish to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe."
Carl Sagan