This is continued from Ayahuasca in Taray, Pisac (which I spelt wrong in the title). [https://www.dmt-nexus.me/forum/default.aspx?g=posts&t=61261]
I don't usually look out of the window on planes. I've been in them enough to know what the world looks like from 10-15,000 feet up. However, upon glancing out at the dense rainforests, cut up by what I believed to be the Amazon and other small connecting rivers, I couldn't help but stare intensely, realising that I was finally going to where I wanted to be for so long; in the Peruvian jungle to find Ayahuasca.
After being pestered by 'shamans' around Iquitos trying to tempt us to go with them for Ayahuasca ceremonies; my friend and I knew we'd have to find a reliable source to find a decent, trustworthy shaman/curandero.
We spoke to our helpful hostel worker who told about jungle excursions which could be fitted in with Ayahuasca ceremonies.
A few hours after our conversation, he came back to us and said he'd found us a curandero, and we were to leave in a couple of days, waking up around 6am, to be taken into the jungle.
Our jungle guide, took us in a motor-taxi, on his private boat across Rio Nanay and part of the Amazon (of which we could see the physical colour of the water change to black) to Padre Cocha. We then took another motor-taxi across rough terrain for about 10 minutes until we reached our destination.
Looking around I saw wooden lodges, jungle and chickens.
I got off the motor-taxi, was introduced to the curandero, who shook my hand and then took my friend and I into the kitchen where we were introduced to another guy taking part in the ceremonies.
To cut a very long story short, the curandero and his family were very accommodating, fed us, took us on jungle tours, to jungle zoos, on the Rio Nanay and the Amazon on his family boat, visited a Bora tribe and of course held Ayahuasca ceremonies.
For the first night, we met the family and got settled into our minimalist room in a wooden lodge, covered in mosquito nets, with no flushing toilet or shower.
We washed by collecting water from a 5ft container, which was filled up daily, scooping the water using a bowl and then pouring it over our heads. We flushed the toilet by pouring a bucket of water down it.
I really wanna write about this whole experience in complete detail but, as you can tell, it will become a novel.
So, onto the first Ayahuasca ceremony.
This day we did no dieta; we ate what we want, including this devilish substance:
I wouldn't advise eating anything like this before Ayahuasca as you will generally just feel like shit from all the sugar. However, it became a sort of joke whilst we were there as we spoke about the dieta but were filling ourselves up with crap as part of our preparation.
Our last meal was around 1.00pm, and then we fasted until 7.00pm, when we would make our way to the ceremony temple.
We were shown the temple during the daytime, however, night time was a completely different story.
I think I walked bare foot through the jungle, or possibly took my shoes off later, in the pitch black, wearing only my swimming trunk shorts, as I had no actual shorts, following the curandero and his apprentice by watching their headlights travel through the darkness.
The curandero unlocked the temple door, and then instructed us to each take a seat on the floor of the circular wooden lodge, which was probably about 30ft in diameter.
I sat to the right of the curandero, where he had a wooden desk set up complete with mapachus (big fat rollies of pure tobacco used for ceremonies), a lighter, a bunch of leaves which turned out to be a form of instrument used for Icaros, some other bits I can't remember and a big San Luis water bottle filled with a brown liquid, complete with a small wooden brown cup. (This is making me feel sick just thinking about it).
After blessing the Ayahuasca, blowing into it, and then pouring into the small cup, he instructed us to come up one by one to drink.
Again, my friend was called up first, then I went up, gulped it down, remembering the sweet taste of what I can only describe as a tea made from dirty plants and leaves, and then left to go cold (which is basically exactly what it is anyway).
To give you a clearer idea; in the temple was the curandero, his apprentice, the guy I met in the kitchen, my friend, and a Japanese guy who had been in isolation and wasn't allowed to speak to anyone but the curandero and his apprentice. I must admit it was a bit spooky to see this guy I hadn't met, who emerged at night time and sat near me in the temple. All I saw of his face was a red silhouette outline, glowing from his red headlight.
Anyway, I sat, feeling the Ayahuasca in my stomach. I closed my eyes and began to meditate, focussing on my pineal gland and the icaros.
Around 45 minutes to an hour, I began to get very DMT like visions (I wonder why...) which got stronger and stronger but never to the point that they were overwhelming.
I then felt the urge to be sick, so I got up and left the temple (as others were doing as there were no buckets).
I stumbled about outside feeling horrible, disoriented and craving that purge to feel better again and move onto the next stage of the trip.
After finding a nice place to vomit, I found I was too ill to even stand, so I dropped to the floor, and laid there. I could feel my skin was burning hot and sweating.
I reminded myself that I was in the jungle, at night, shoes and shirt off, advertising my pale white skin to all the lovely mosquitoes and insects, however, throughout the entire endeavour, nothing even gave me a nibble! Not that I cared in the slightest over how ill I felt.
Finally I started throwing up on the grass, to which I thought would be the start to an end of this disgusting feeling... how wrong I was.
For the next 2-3 hours I was being sick constantly. Each purge made me weaker and weaker, iller and iller. I couldn't even focus on any of the visions due to how ill I felt.
Whilst vomiting into the dark jungle floor, my vomit seemed to resemble the Spitfire skateboard logo, as if the devil was coming out of me.
One thing I do remember, is thinking that there was a river on the other side of a tree in front of me, and that my friend was stood next to the tree being sick. But neither were true.
Also, looking to my right I saw what looked like a Navajo or Peruvian tribesman hanging from a noose off a branch. I knew this wasn't real. I blinked several times in disbelief, trying to decipher what was really there. It stayed there for around 30 seconds until I finally saw that it was really just another branch.
In other words, the hallucinations outside with the plants were completely mind bending.
One of the guys from inside the temple seemed concerned about me and tried to get me to come back inside, I told him I couldn't, and proved by showing that every time I tried to move, my body responded by throwing up.
For years and years I daydreamed and visualised going to Peru and drinking Ayahuasca; 'I wanna live in the jungle and do it 100 times' were general thoughts I had.
However, in the midst of laying in a puddle of vomit, unable to think straight, getting strong, uncontrollable, debilitating and disorientating visions which threw my body off balance even further; I thought to myself 'I've signed up for 6 more of these??'.
I reassured myself that they would get easier, become more enjoyable, and I would learn a great deal from them if I could just get through this hell.
Luckily, I remembered my 'training' from smoking DMT, how to handle trips you can't handle (sounds like a book!). And put my past experiences to practice to try and contain the visions to a minimum and gradually bring my mind closer and closer to a more sober and calm state.
This, combined with telling myself 'you wanted this, now you've got it', helped me relax a bit until I was instructed that it was time to return back to my lodge to sleep.
Before doing this I went back into the temple, picked up my water bottle, torch and pillow, stepped outside, had one more vomit, then made my way back to my lodge.
Still I could barely walk, it was impossible to move in a straight line, and there were small wooden bridges to cross over little rivers which seemed like a massive challenge. The 5 minute walk to the temple seemed to take hours to go back through.
It was as if I'd forgotten how to balance my body properly, one step forward took me 2 to the left, and another 3 forward. I'm sure I fell over a couple of times as well.
After hitting that pillow in my bed I knew it was all over, and I could prepare myself for the next one after a day's rest.
I woke up to find myself feeling embarrassed that I couldn't handle even standing up to come back into the temple. I definitely felt a sense of let down towards the curandero especially as I didn't stay inside for his icaros. However, no-one seemed bothered, and I'm sure they'd seen it all before.
Although, I was sure they thought I wouldn't want to do another ceremony.
I assured myself that it was my big purge, a test from Ayahuasca to see if I was worthy enough to bare the bad stuff so that I could experience the positives.
Previous to this ceremony, I had never been scared to drink Ayahuasca, now a gut wrenching feeling consumed me. I let it slide, telling myself that the 3rd ceremony would be different; I was more prepared for the 'bad' stuff now and was determined to see how far I could go.
Well that's it, again, another long post.
I was gonna write up the 7 ceremonies in Iquitos in one topic but I guess I'll have to save them for another. I won't go into much detail with the remaining, only the 8th and final ceremony which was one of the best experiences of my life.
Thanks if anyone made it through the whole thing!
Everything I say is actually false and I'm not real.