The worst trip i've ever had was when i smoked dmt after drinking alcohol all night (reason number 1 why this went south). Before anyone gets on my ass about it ill just say, i knew better before i did it and i definitely know better now.
It could not have been a worse time to do it. Period. My friend was moving away the next day so we decided to have some spiritual bonding time before my girl came to pick me up. I "sobered up" and we got everything together and were about to start when she knocked on the front door. I asked her if she could just wait for 20 mins or so but she was adamant about leaving so i told her to just go. i knew i was being an ass and i felt really bad about it (reason number 2 that this went south). She leaves, i go back inside and we sit in silence for about 10 min so we can clear our minds (foggy from jack daniels, so without much success for me at least) My buddy has the idea that we should do it with the lights off in total pitch black darkness. I had a good bit of experience with the spice but never had the lights off so i agreed to try it. This was only his second time doing it. Turned off the light and then came the moment of launch. I went first then he went after.
I hit it out of a bong with some cannabis, don't know exactly how much but . .alot. It wasn't my first time using a bong so i knew what to expect. But this time it was ... different. The onset was so rapid i didn't even have time to exhale. It felt as if the universe was just waiting to hurt me. It felt wrong from the beginning. My vision framed out in the darkness ... fast very fast. I saw 3 squares like picture frames and they shifted and twisted 3 times. Like an old fashioned camera. Then i was lost, i was sure i was gone ... forever
I had no control whatsoever. I could usually catch myself when i go tumbling but not this time. I was then surrounded by a bunch of long black tendrils with hands and they were slapping me in the face over and over and over. I dont know if my eyes were open or shut it was terrifying. I knew i was either being punished or i had opened a doorway to the other side of hyperspace. . . somewhere no one has been. Then the thought crossed my mind. What if this was a bad batch of spice. Im gone forever this is my eternity . . . it felt like eternity.
I then heard my friends voice telling me it was ok that i was ok ( i don't know why he would do that i may have been mumbling or shaking?) he grabbed my hand and i could feel it and hear him talking, my eyes were open but i couldn't see. I started to panic even more as i felt my soul was drifting through this void and my connection with the world was fading. All the while i'm being beaten by these hands . . slapped. i finally realize the light are of so i yell at the top of my lungs TURN ON THE F!@#$%^ lights!! Then i sense of relief washed over me like i had never felt. I was instantly thankful for my existence . . . all i could do was cry .... i was really emotional for a while after it happened i don't know how or why but it did somthing to me. That was my last time doing a large dose. I plan to do more shortly i'm not afraid of the spice but i'm not gonna lie that experience rattled me.
opinions?

I see that entities slap you very often. Maybe it's something like parent/child relation? Although parents sometimes slap their child, it is not because they hate them, but because they love and care for them (I'm against corporal punishment, but I'm just comparing the two). But again, you're the one who should integrate the experience, and find out what that actually means.

If you intend doing it again, this time do it sober. Many folks have said that alcohol and spice just don't mix together.

Peace and love.

I personally recommend either taking a break for a little bit and ponder over your experiences so far and what they might mean in regards to you as a person and the life that you're living. There might be some changes they want you to make before you come back and you might not be welcome until you've done so. This can be things like: Nutrition, Regular sleep, Excersise, Your job, relationships with people etc. It can be good to focus on just making improvements in general until you feel a call of some sort to come back. You could also just dial it back a bit and start working with lower doses, I felt like there was a lot of preperation that had to be done within myself before I was truly welcome into hyperspace and I also at one point had an experience like yours which truly shook me to the core and that was because I tried to force entry rather than letting it happen the way it feels like it should be done - learning to navigate your way deeper at low doses.

I agree with you on that one. It has been months since i have journeyed. My life has changed drastically in that time. Definitely for the better. Ive had a longing to refresh myself for a few weeks now. That is the reason i am here on this site. I cant stop thinking about my experiences. Just needed some different views on them. I think i got so comfortable with the enlightenment i felt idk entitled i suppose. I think i'll give it another month of reflection before i go again.

Oversoul that is a very interesting point. I doesn't feel so hostile if i look at it in that perspective.