Reality Rabbit
Posts: 2 Joined: 23-Aug-2014 Last visit: 27-Aug-2014
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I've yet to try DMT for myself, though if ever I should have the opportunity, it is something I am very much eagerly anticipating. As far as psychedelics go (or so-called "drugs" in general for that matter), I've only tried magic mushrooms, LSD, and marijuana. However, my last shroom trip was a very unique and quite unusual experience for me, and up until then, I had no knowledge that other people had ever been to the places I had or seen or even conceptualized the things I had. None of my friends had had anything comparable on mushrooms, and when I described what I felt and what had occurred to me during that trip, they each thought my experience was just very unique. Now, after having learned quite a bit about DMT and the types of things that people experience on that, I feel I simply was able to achieve a high that may be somewhat comparable due to the high dosage of mushrooms I had had (I had mostly stems, so I decided to ingest more, as nothing was happening within the first half hour as I had anticipated). After my most recent experience with mushrooms back in June, I wrote this e-mail to my boyfriend in an attempt to describe what had happened. This was the beginning of my journey: Quote:This is going to be very difficult for me to explain in any real detail just what it was that I experienced and what I felt I gained from our mushroom trip, but I will try to do my best to share with you. I know going into it, a lot of this is going to sound crazy, but it was so eye-opening and so real for me, that I believe in it.
Each time I've done mushrooms now, I felt as if I've come out of it with more knowledge than before. The first time I did it, I was just on the brink. I knew I felt smarter than I normally do, but in a different way than just being a bright person. I felt more insightful, but I still was just enjoying the high euphoria of that. Being on shrooms in White Sands though, I felt even more informed somehow, but I still was only starting this journey.
Yesterday, I just kept delving deeper and deeper. I felt myself getting carried away and absorbing all of this knowledge, more than I was even prepared to acquire. I am naturally a very curious person, interested in learning as much as I can, especially about mysterious things that we still can't wrap our heads around or that science is still in the process of explaining. But the knowledge that continued to flood into me was detaching me from my Earthly self in a way. It took me away from my emotions unlike anything I can say I've ever experienced. I was no longer bound by my outer shell of a body, and therefore I did not feel the need to be attached to bodily needs. At the time, it felt like it would be very insulting for me to share this with anyone - that I was beyond the point of needing. I went to this place where I was just me, the true me, the essence of me apart from my body, as if I had evolved past being human and to just being. It was like a place that was between birth and death where you are just purely you. Even while I was there, I was able to fully comprehend how unique that experience was and that most people had not ever been there before. I knew something special and something very grand was happening, that these waves of realization were coming over me all the time. I had all this wisdom and all this understanding. I could grasp and perceive so much, but it is beyond my recollection or explanation now.
I realized, as this was all happening, that I was becoming more and more detached and less "human." As much as it felt amazing to be able to be able to understand so much, I did not want to abandon my Earthly attachments. I did not want to separate myself from being human. I didn't want to go back to this place where nothing matters, where you are just one with everything and have absolutely no needs or desires or feelings other than being perfectly at peace with just being and knowing. I felt like I was slipping into that state that perhaps all people were at one point before they became people, but I didn't want to be there right now. I wasn't ready. I wanted to go back to being grounded and to being completely ignorant of it all. I wanted to feel again and to need again, to have these human attachments, however silly they may be on the grand scale of things. It occurred to me, in this state, that it is very primitive to feel emotions and to not be able to just be in this all-knowing, all-accepting, all-wise state of being. However, I was not ready to be a part of that. I wanted to go back to the way I was, and I was almost afraid I could not, because even though I still was aware that I didn't fully get to a place where I had unlocked all the knowledge possible, I still had uncovered a lot, and I couldn't unlearn what I had seen. But I wanted to return, I wanted to come back and to be a very simple-minded person again, able to enjoy feeling and enjoy not knowing everything and just be content with life and all its attachments, including being in love. I wanted to come back to that, because I wanted to be with you. I wanted to feel everything that being here allows me to feel for you. I wasn't ready to just let that go. You were my reason for wanting to stay grounded, for not wanting to be carried away with all this insight.
When I was coming back down over the next couple of hours, I could feel myself being released gradually from this place of wisdom. My thoughts kept slipping away all the time, first slowly, and then enough to where I knew I was losing my ability to hold on. However, every now and then I'd feel myself being pulled back to these enlightened thoughts, but I knew it was only fleeting. Yet it was such a relief in a way to know I could return to myself here, that the me I had always known still existed, and with that, so too did my humanly attachments. I did not want to be detached forever. I was just so very thankful that I could experience stupid needs, like wanting to eat food again and wanting to feel loved again. I just became so grateful for all my human needs and desires and emotions. That's not to say that being at peace with everything and not having desires was a bad thing. But I'm in love. I love you. I didn't want to let go of that so readily.
I ended up talking to [a friend] a little bit about all this and told him a shortened version of what I just told you. His response was this:
holy crap! now that is a seriously psychedelic experience. good work! in short, no, i have not had that particular trip. that sounds most definitely like a +4 on the Shulgin scale, you should most assuredly cherish the opportunity to have been given that. sounds like a true gift of a trip. in a way it seems you've been given a glimpse of the Buddhist view of enlightenment. but as you say, perhaps without being "ready" for it. psychedelics have a tendency to open doors that cannot then be closed. i could probably talk for hours on the subject. but in essence, you've experienced something many people search for all their lives, so definitely cherish it. now the trick is to see how you can build on it, learn from it.
I looked up the Shulgin Rating Scale, which I had not heard of before, and reading about a +4 experience completely and totally seems to describe what I was feeling:
PLUS FOUR (++++) A rare and precious transcendental state, which has been called a 'peak experience', a 'religious experience,' 'divine transformation,' a 'state of Samādhi' and many other names in other cultures. It is not connected to the +1, +2, and +3 of the measuring of a drug's intensity. It is a state of bliss, a participation mystique, a connectedness with both the interior and exterior universes, which has come about after the ingestion of a psychedelicdrug, but which is not necessarily repeatable with a subsequent ingestion of that same drug. If a drug (or technique or process) were ever to be discovered which would consistently produce a plus four experience in all human beings, it is conceivable that it would signal the ultimate evolution, and perhaps the end, of the human experiment.
I hope this all doesn't sound too scary or too out there. I know it is really bizarre, and it's hard to even talk about or explain, since describing anything in great detail that you feel and experience and think about while on psychedelics is almost impossible. But it was just such an experience.
I feel like I was definitely learning a lot and ascending to this place where all this knowledge was transforming me. I became very aware that my body is just a place where I am living, and that, in some ways, the best sort of feeling is being outside your body and separating yourself from your attachments, and that many drugs and substances help you achieve that, and perhaps that's why people do them, to feel less trapped and bound. Looking at myself in the mirror, I just felt like I looked so strange, like that wasn't really the true me. It dawned on me, while I was high, that that's why people become so fascinated by themselves and take photos of themselves, because how you look isn't who you are.
It was very unique. I am just thankful to be here more than ever and so happy to be able to enjoy this life with you. You mean everything to me. I felt, during that trip, I was given the ability to be awakened and to see into a place where I understand the workings of the mind and how I could achieve liberation. Yet, given that option to be awakened, I continued to want to say no. I wanted to stay, to feel, to be attached. I wanted to be with you. You were my reason to stay. You are my reason. I'm wondering, after reading this, do you think I've experienced something at least somewhat similar to what people feel from DMT (especially in regards to detachment from oneself, the flood of knowledge, and the death of your ego)? ~TEO
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DMT-Nexus member
Posts: 5267 Joined: 01-Jul-2010 Last visit: 13-Dec-2018
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My shrooms and ayahuasca trips seemed to be pretty indistinguishable from each other after a while. There have been times I've taken shrooms and thought to myself that if I didn't actually remember eating the mushrooms, I would have thought I had drunk ayahuasca based on the visions I was having. I find vaporized DMT to be a bit more crystal clear and concise than either shrooms or ayahuasca, and it is my personal opinion that you can go further with DMT despite the harmala content of ayahuasca, or to a purer representation of hyperspace, but I'm sure there will be others who disagree with me, and don't find that observation to ring true for them. "Science without religion is lame. Religion without science is blind" - Albert Einstein
"The Mighty One appears, the horizon shines. Atum appears on the smell of his censing, the Sunshine- god has risen in the sky, the Mansion of the pyramidion is in joy and all its inmates are assembled, a voice calls out within the shrine, shouting reverberates around the Netherworld." - Egyptian Book of the Dead
"Man fears time, but time fears the Pyramids" - 9th century Arab proverb
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DMT-Nexus member
Posts: 96 Joined: 11-May-2014 Last visit: 06-Feb-2015
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Life itself is the most amazing thing we will ever know. These substances only allow us to see deeper and to appreciate it on deeper levels. You may well have experienced something similar, however nothing is as pure and clean as dmt. Our bodies know exactly how to deal with it. There are no ill side effect etc.. We hit the wall, dmt is the end all, the end, its second to none. I Am Not Someone Who Isn't Me!
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