Dosage: Three separate trips: 10g, 10g, and 20g of dried B+ all using Lemon Tek preparation.
Set: First 10g was anxious, somewhat fearful of the impending intensity, second 10g and 20g I was ready and willing. For all three the basic mindset was exploration with the hopes of true hallucinations and possible ego dissolution. I'm a 41 year-old, 155lb male.
Setting: My bedroom during the afternoon with videos playing on my computer. I was listening to them with headphones so that if the sound became too much I could just take the headphones off and be left in relative silence.
This is my first trip report, so I'll start with a bit of my usage to date. The first substance I ever tried was LSD just over 20 years ago when I was 21 years-old. It was love at first hit. Even though we weren't monogamous, she was my definite go-to girl. I've done mushrooms, weed, and various incarnations of ecstasy. I have no clue as to numbers of trips over the years. Dozens upon dozens except for weed which when smoked does next to nothing for me unless I smoke a ton so I've only smoked a handful of times. I was never really serious about drug usage. It was always just a social activity so I never really put much energy into finding and partaking of some of the heavier substances out there even though I have always been curious. In fact it was probably a few years since I had last done anything other than some THC candies when I finally got some LSD and mushrooms again.
Getting back into the psychedelic world prompted me to actually do some research on the subject. I watched DMT: The Spirit Molecule and things just exploded from there. I bought the book and devoured every line. I bought Pihkal and Tihkal, a few Terence McKenna books, as well as a bunch of others on LSD, ayahuasca, mescaline, and psychedelia in general. I have also watched countless hours of youtube videos of the various psychedelic lectures that I'm sure most here have seen many times over as well.
So with a more serious bit of knowledge I started to really examine the trips I was having and began to question what my intentions really were. I quickly realized that the love affair with LSD was over. My mushroom trips were far more enjoyable on various levels. Not to sound too clichéd or to state the obvious, but the LSD trips simply felt too chemical, and lacking for any sense of real knowledge behind them. The mushroom trips on the other hand felt innately organic, more in tune with my body, and I started to feel like there was a presence trying to connect with my when I tripped. With this in mind, I started looking deeper into psilocybin information. Then I came across this video:
Kilindi Iyi - High-Dose Mushrooms Beyond the ThresholdAt this point I was taking doses of 5g. These trips were fun, but that presence was always too far away, unable to really make contact and I knew I wanted that to change. Hearing Kilindi Iyi talk about the possibilities of and especially the safety of 20g+ doses decided for me what my course of action was to be.
I didn't want to dive right into 20+g so I decided to try 10g first. As I'm not a huge fan of the taste of dried shrooms, I started to search for better ways to take them. Of course I found out about Lemon Tek.
The first 10g trip felt like the mushrooms were testing me. I was obviously a bit nervous and a little scared so that didn't help. I also decided to try Terence McKenna's suggestion of doing them in the dark, in silence. This probably didn't help either for this first higher dose trip. I think the fact that by using the Lemon Tek method and having the mushrooms hit in 15 minutes and be really roaring along by 30 minutes really made me wonder what I had gotten myself into. This caused the trip to be a combination of paranoia (Was the slight nausea I'm feeling from the mushrooms or did my roommate somehow find the mushrooms and poison me?) and a sense of doom (I felt like I was trying to remember some horrific act that I witnessed years ago). Of course neither were true, but that's the trip I was on. The paranoia and doom were oppressive, but not unmanageable. Once I was over the peak, things settled down and I was back to having a fun mushroom trip, watching Dennis McKenna lectures on youtube. When I was back to being able to have coherent thoughts, I mentally scolded myself for being so stupid to think about poisonings and possible murders and told myself it was all because of the anxiety of taking a far heavier dose than I was used to.
The second 10g trip was pretty much the complete opposite. I knew how fast it would hit and how strong it should be so I wasn't nervous at all. This trip was amazing. Once I had come up and the trip was in full swing, I was in a state of pure bliss. The smearing of my vision was to the point that I couldn't tell where I was any longer, but it didn't matter. It felt like every cell of my body was having a non-sexual orgasm. I felt better then I ever felt on even pure MDMA. It was actually ridiculous how good it felt. My focus kept slipping away from how I was feeling to simply just the sensations that were occurring which in those instance encompassed the whole universe. This lasted for close to an hour then the non-sexual orgasms faded away leaving me an exhausted, contorted pile of flesh on my bed. Slowly the high faded further and further until I was finally able to fall asleep. The after-effects never died though. I was like my emotional state was permanently changed for the better. When I woke up the next day, I knew I was ready for 20g.
A couple weeks after that 10g trip I got everything set up for my first 20g trip. As the Lemon Tek was doing it's magic in the fridge, I got a playlist of videos ready on my computer: BBC The Magic of Mushrooms, Brazil, Manifesting the Mind: Footprints of the Shaman, and Dirty Pictures. I think it was roughly 2:00pm when everything was ready and I drank the psilocin nectar down.
15min: The familiar crackly body sensations, almost like very small insects crawling through my veins begins. I know that sounds horrifying, but I actually really enjoy it. I envision it as if it's the molecules of psilocin making their way through my body. Over the next 15 minutes a high pitched whine begins in my ears not unlike tinnitus. This warbles and fluctuates, overtaking the normal sounds around me with an added near-physical sensation of my range of hearing being compressed to the point of almost being deaf, but then it snaps back into place and I can hear normally again. This snapping sensation then takes over my entire perceptual apparatus. The high is ever-increasing then for a second or two everything freezes, both mental and physical and I feel completely sober. Then the high snaps back into place, the universe resumes its motion and the trip continues.
30min: By this point, there are no more moments of feeling sober. I'm completely on my way. The whine in my ears has stopped and the sensation of the psilocin coursing through my body has given way to feeling completely inundated with this wonderful substance. My vision is smearing quite fully now. The world looks like an abstract painting flowing in front of my eyes. The sound from the BBC mushroom documentary is far too distracting so I take the headphones off and am left with the sound of the birds outside my window.
60min: This is where it starts to get difficult to remember clearly what was happening. My vision is completely taken over by swaths of color. Nothing is discernible to any degree. I start to lose track of where I am and even who I am. But there is nothing to possibly worry about because for those moments when I do know who I am, I feel as if I am being washed over with happiness; my own internal happiness is ever-increasing, but also happiness is flowing over me from something outside of my being. It feels like being hugged and embraced by pure bliss. As it starts to seep into my body, the sensations become too much and I lose all track of anything else. My ego is being completely dissolved and all of existence is pure happiness.
3hr: I only know this length of time has passed because in the moments where I can see properly again, Brazil is just finishing on my computer screen. I have moments of ego dissolution intermittently for the next half hour until I fully reform in my own mind.
4.5hr: The last hour and a half have been spent writhing in ecstasy on my bed. As with the 10g trip, every cell of my body has been having constant flashes and eruptions of non-sexual orgasmic energy. Then I have to pee. Holy. Fuck. This amplifies the sensations ten-fold. I hold it back as long as I can, but finally I give in before I pee my bed and stagger to the bathroom.
By the time I make it back to my bedroom, the intense physical sensations are starting to fade and I get comfy to finish watching Manifesting the Mind and Dirty Pictures while the trip gently fades away leaving me mentally and physically exhausted, but feeling utterly exalted.
These last two trips were in the last three weeks, but I'm still reeling from them and have the distinct impression that some permanent changes have occurred within my being. At a very core level I am quite noticeably happier. Which is quite apparent because at this point in the year (a few weeks after the school year has ended) I usually fall into a deep depression. I absolutely love school (just finished third year of art and design university) so especially since the end of the year is spent going at about 250% of my creative capacity, suddenly going to 0% creative output (I'm studying ceramics so it's not really possible to do much at home) is intensely depressing. But I don't feel any of that. I am near-blissful all the time now. Negative thoughts just fade away from my own mind almost as soon as they form, and negativity from other people doesn't even affect me. I'm just too intrinsically happy with life to have it stick at all.
Before I did the 20g, I was seriously hoping that I would actually hallucinate like Kilindi Iyi talks about in his video. In all the times I've taken psychedelics over the last 20+ years, I have hallucinated once. There's always the typical breathing, blurring, fractalization, and closed-eye visuals, but I've only ever seen something completely not there once. I was watching Fantasia 2000 on a couple hits of acid at a house party. During the scene with the flying whales suddenly they all had big yellow happy faces. At first I thought, “Well that's kinda odd that Disney would add that in like that. It really doesn't fit with the rest of the artistic style,” then I looked around the room. Every person at the party also had a big yellow happy face over their real face. But it only lasted until I acknowledged that I was hallucinating and got excited about it finally happening. The happy faces popped out of existence and I was back to the normal over-saturated, smeary, multiplied visuals I always have with acid.
But all in all I'm not complaining about not hallucinating. I will gladly do without fully realized hallucinations if it means I will have the feeling of being enveloped in happiness for hours on end.
I do know that the low-dose trips are over for me though. 1-5g are fun, but ultimately take me nowhere close to where I want to go. 10g is my new minimum from here on out (barring trying lower does of new strains initially to gauge their strength) with 20g probably becoming my standard dose. I'm thinking that before the school years starts up again in September, I'll have to try a 30+g dose as well since I find the state of ego dissolution to be rather fascinating.