Hi,
here I'll share with you the few dmt experiences i had so far.
First of all i want to thank all the community. This is really immense source of information and an a sheer example of great attitude towards psychonautics!
Really special thanks to members in the chat room for helping me out, and specially to Cyb and Dooby for their display of help and answers to my inquiries! Big thank you, guys!
I hope i am not breaking any rule of the community by merging my extraction notes and my expereinces reports in the same thread. I find it more proper to use the same thread for that. If it's not right, please let me know.
Experiences Report:
First Experience: I chose to try water enhanced leaf with the warm water changa tek. I used 0.1 g lime (Lime leaves, as lime you make tea from
) : 0.1g spice.
Spice had some impurities, visible one like some clusters of dust, and it it because i've let my 4th pull evap outside. Used that for the first try. So i made a simple bong out of plastic bottle, made a screen to lay down my eleaf - stainless steel mesh, which i previously heated on a gas stove and boiled in hot water to remove more impurities off. Loaded half of the changa i had prepared. Lit a canldle then turned off the lights. I knew that i have to keep lighter on far as possible, and inhale slowly and deep, not too strong. I also knew that i have keep hits as long as possible, though 15-20 sec was long enough for a first timer. Second hit - the selfmade bong filled with white smoke and i inhaled deep and slowly, kept for about 20 secs.And i was shattered, i felt something extremely strange is going to happen right now with and it is approaching me at some monstrous speed. It had the feel of gratitude and love. I felt that my brain might explode any moment, but wasn't scared, just astnonished of what is happenning to me right now. I was feeling tight buzz in my brain and in my nose and on the TOP OF MY TONGUE. Like my tongue and brain started vibrating some signal... It was very strange. And suddenly i realize some lights strated moving around me. Everything looked so wonderful and detailed. I i felt like this is the corridor to somethings that is ever more weird than this itself. No breakthrough yet.
I looked at the linoleum in the room, it is normally filled some industrial grid for decoration, and now everything at the floor was moving, everything was filled with its own microscopic life, that is in direct connection with everything else, and they co-exist in perfect harmony. Fractal animations were evolving coming and going like a musical piece. I did not breakthrough. I remember the kaleidoscopic fractal visions on the floor pretty well though. The emotional charge was one of love and unity. I remember i felt pretty excited and i went outside in the garden, to check how i 'see things differently'. Hopefully i could walk as a sober guy and nothing bad happened. Although it was pretty cold and was wearing t-shirt, but wasn't paying attention to that, i was too excited and emotional about the meeting with dmt. I did not breakthrough this first time, i could define it as a slight sub-breakthrough with very intense OEV's. I intuitively felt that my ego was an a obstacle for me to be taken to a more profound experience. At some point i remember that the kaleidoscopic patterns on the linoleum at the floor formed a devil head with two horns, i am pretty sure about that. That devilish face wasn't scary or evil, but was smiling at me, as if were saying 'So..so...You have not come here for quite long! Welcome back!' And after that i become overexcited and the experience went off slowly.
Second Experience:
I bought a small glass bong (will show pictures) to smoke dmt with. Although i am occasional marijuana smoker, i had never smoked from bong, i love rolling joints. That experience was with spice from my first extracion, the cleanest fluffy crystals i've got so far. I made changa applying the warm water tek - 0.08 g lime : 0.08 g spice. I felt pretty nervous, cause i suspected from other people's experiences how bizzare a first breakthrough experience might be. I didn't have any idea of a descent smoking technique yet. Knew i have to be really careful about not burning the spice, but melting it then vaporizing it. Had a little of hard time and experimentation, but on that second time smoking, i successfully made 3 deep hits. First hit - was able to keep it in for 20 secs. On the second hit that powerful vibration in my head, nose and tip of the tongue had already started, so i am not sure i kept it for 20 secs, but it was more than 15 anyways. Later i understood that this powerful vibration might be what is reffered to as Carrier wave. The third hit i cannot recall how long i've kept in my lungs, because as soon as i started inhaling, i was already somewhere else. I was feeling as i was just turned into a glass-like pyramid room of some sort. And this room is me and all the Being. I feel the presense of a crystal-like green Wizard. He is speaking something very anxiously to someone. I have the feeling he is surprised i am there now. He is making all that is visible. I mean like he creates all the tangible world from ground-zero just with the energy with his 'flow of thougtht'. I could feel that i am moving forward that pyramid-like room, as the room is me and all the world. He keeps on speaking in that allien language very anxiously. I made the assosiation that he is some sort of other-worldly Alchemist, whose opus is the tangible reality for me and everything in this Universe. For some moments i could see my surroundings in the room. Everything looks shiny, colours are unusually vivid, and the most curious thing - everything is made out of glass-like energy, that transmutes and transforms to other objects. Did not see those fractal and kaleidoscopic OEV's as the first time. For me they appear in the sub-breakthrough stage. The feeling was as if i've returned to a state, not a place, that everything i imagine as existence started out. The Wizard speaks in that unknown language, i don't understand anything he 'says', but 'telepathically' he says to me "Now you remember. This is where it all started". The experience lasted about 5-7 minutes. Nothing more extraordinary has ever happened to me.
Third experence:Warm water changa - 0.05 g lime : 0.05 spice. My smoking technique still sucks. I couldn't breakthrough. I didn't get OEV's or COE's. I had really big expextaions, based on my previous trip. I burned the spice. Or at least this is what i thought back then.
Fourth Experience : Warm water tek changa - 0.08 g lime : 0.08 g spice. This is yet spice from my first extraction, those good white crystals. I succeeded breakthrough with two big hits from that small bong. This time there was no carrier wave. Everytime i smoke dmt, i lit a candle on the table, and sit in my bed, put a pillow between my back and the wall. On the second hit i remember just placing the bong on the bed after slowly inhaling. Started counting, but i made it no more than 10-11-12-13 and BAM! - i was hyperspacing. No carrier wave, it was just so sudden. This experience was very different for me. I could still picture the transition - my transformation into that glass-like edgy pyramid-like room (That is me and the reality). This time i was taken to be shown a sort of Gaian bulb of all-emerging love and unity. This time i could feel the presence of the Wizard, but he intended to keep silent, as he was taking me to that place of love and unity. This experience had a very feminine feel to it. I was shown that everything in the universe is love. The universal energy of all being is love, and we're all made of it. That giant bulb felt like some sort of Mother Goddess - the starting point of all being. She watched at me and kept silent. The emotion she is transmitting to me : Appreciate your life, everything in it. You're all made of that love and bliss you see here. You're have been returning here many many times. But the rules of the cosmic being are so that you have to be there, in your human world, as you're the Wizard's experiment, and your beingness provides our beingness here. If you dissolve the sense of "I", you can see that there is no difference in the worlds." She didn't say that to me. I felt it like some sort of telepathical message. She is all-seeing and all-caring, and will be always there for
everything in the nature. Then i could focus on an area, a fragment of that giant feminine sphere, and saw a Buddha-like creature, more like it was the Primordial object of all human beings or a Brahman of some sort. He is emitting love, grace and warmthm, i could see just his Hisr Goddess. I 'came back' almost scared cause i thought i have forgotten to breathe. Experience lasted about 5 minutes.
Fifth experience:This time i used the sandwich method, just to gain some different aspect on my smoking technique. 0.05 spice was put between ~ 0.1 g of dry lime leaves. Again i had a very intense breakthrough. The presence of that Green Wizard was dominating. I can't remember very much from that experience, apart from that the feeling of movement, transition into that pyramid-glass-like-object-that-is-me is coherent with his 'speaking' and his 'speaking' is actually his 'doing', 'creating' of my reality. He is some sort of demiurge that creates the universe by his language. Don't remember how long the experience was. Overall emotional state was positive and i had the feeling now he gets to know me and is not that surprised i am there with him. He doesn't 'speak' so anxiously as before.
Sixth experience:Sandwiched 0.06 g spice in 0.06 lime in the bong. Breakthrough on the second hit. No carrier wave again. This time it was quite different. I am in some sort of intergalactic space. I am turned into a spherical object by some playful creature. I cannot picture it, but i feel it's presence and its power over me there. It turns me into that spherical room and changes the shapes of the room just by the use of his 'thought', and it does in the rate of couple of tens of times per ... 'second'. I am being transformed into differently shaped hyperspace objects (rooms), and after that, just for a while that playful entity brings into me (the room) a whole group of other entities. He is like their tourist-guide and he shows them around in hyperspace. And it is just a coincidence that he used me as a hyperspace landscape for that occasion. All the entities were inside me for a pretty short time and then they quickly had gone, continued with their cruise. After that the peak of the experience passes by. I could see my surroundings, was watching at my arms, the bed, the walls. I thought the experience was over, but suddenly i feel the presence of
a feminine entitiy, some sort of saint. She is not as powerful as the Mother Goddess, but has a similar type of energy to her. I got pretty excited about it, and started speaking in some sort of ancient, indidan like mumbling in a manner of showing her my respect and awe for her. She was emitting the feeling of love, gratitude and inner peace. I was seeing her like 2 feet in front of me. I was doing some gestures with my right hand as part of showing my respect to her. I hadn't been plannning on doing so, i just felt the urge to do it, once i felt her presence. I was really captivated by that meeting, when suddenly i felt that a small, toy-like creature was emerging from hyperspace to my room and was curious to observe my way of life. He looked like some idol-creature, a ritual indian doll made of glass-like particles, had something on his head and was holding a rod. He wasn't bothering with observing me, he was very eager to interfere and appear into my world, the tangible reality. He took a peak into my room and then suddenly disappeared. That lasted about 10 seconds and after that the experience went out. This time whole
experience lasted about 7-8 minutes.
Seventh experience:
Sanwiched 0.05 g spice in 0.1 g lime. I did three hits this time. Instant breakthrough after inhaling the third one. No carrier wave of buzzing vibration beforehands. This time was the most playful experience i had. I had a quick transition through the pyramid-like green-particle room and was LITERALLY BLOWN AWAY to see hyperspace. I was in between some really unimaginable worlds. For the first time i could feel that i am able to intentionally move in the hyperspace and stir my 'falling' into those worlds. Just for a tiny fragments of the 'second' i could see that my mind is a tunnel-like flow of energy and it could emerge to meet those different 'realities'. And then suddenly i was sucked by one of the sides of the tunnel. It felt like as if where i was passing by, there were some sort of 'gravitational pull' and that energy sucked me into the meeting that followed. A friendly entity was in front of me. Again, like the previous experience, i had the feeling that it is making a room (an object) out of me, and he does it to observe and study me from the perspective of my innermost nature. I felt he was communicating with me in an way as easy to understand. It told me that this is where all being starts and all being comes back to, that all the universe is made out of love and all my existential fears are an illusion, but a necessary one, 'for the way this game is played'. Then i remember i could grasp my surroundings for a while, and that entity was telling to me at the same time : "Don't let yourself be captivated by the vanity of it all! Pay Attention to what am i doing! Pay Attention! Pay Attention!" As he was insisting on me paying attention of what he is doing my surroundings - the bed, the floor, the walls, everything turned glassy-edged and sharp again, and i had the feeling that this entity is also like the Green Wizard - he is also creating my world just by being there in hyperspace. Then he took me back with him and turned me again into a room/object and showed me that what i experience now as my life is eternity and we're all eternal. I remember i was really shocked by that. As a contrast to the feel that when meeting the spirits in hyperspace, one is being entertained. So instantly i could feel that this playful entity is somehow the Wizard camouflaged and he is doing that just to 'entertain' my cruise in those worlds. I have the feeling of seeing him smiling (in a bit scary, uncanny way) and waving at me, as soon as the tryptamine effect starts to go down, and telling m "This is It. This is where all starts. All is eternity. You are eternity. There is no death. You will always be. You are endless
energy of our love for you! And this message is really dubious and strange. I have this feeling of the wizard saying to me that every time i have met him so far. This was maybe my most positive experience. After it clarity of the mind was really present i felt in harmony with everything in daily life. Peak of the experience lasted about 5 minutes. I remember i 'came back' with a deep breath as if I were underwater and had been out of breath for too long. I suspect that i forget to breathe at some point of the peak experience and this might be what ceases my trips so suddenly - if oxygen deficiency occurs, who knows?
Eighth experience :I might have pyrolized the spice, or it might have not wanted to let me in. Sandwich method of 0.05 g dmt layered between 0.05 lime. I wasn't in a very positive state of mind that day, i got into a fight, and i think this might have been the reason it turned out that way. I didn't even get to sub-breakthrough, no CEV's OEV's. Just realized ain't gonna be that day
Ninth experience :Sandwiched 0.07 g dmt in 0.1 lime into the bong. This was my firt take out with the spice from my second extraction. Couldn't tell of a sensible difference of taste or smell of the smoke. Smoke was white though. Made 2 deep hits. Inhaling really slowly. No carrier wave again. No fractals or caleidoscopic visions. I think it was a light sub-breakthrough. Didn't see the pyramid object. No Wizard this time. I could feel the presence of a feminine spirit, but she wasn't saying anything, wasn't trying to communicate, she was just observing me. Then i remember i closed my eyes and i felt that above me appeared an octopus or jellyfish-like purple entity that sucked my head up with it's tentacles. It wasn't threatening or something. It felt calm and loving. It was exploring me by ingesting me. Once it sucked me up, i could see myself in the insides of that entity, like i was placed below its 'ass'. I was perplexed to see that where it tentacles merged - as to say - it's core - there was a visible flow of some alien language. A Language made out of symbols that were shining light. I had never seen some similar symbols so i have no figurative way of describing it. I had the feeling that this language is made out of some default universal energy. This language is not a syntax-one, but a communicational system of emotional contemplation. That experience was quite short - maybe 2-3 minutes max.
Tenth experience :The second time i smoke dmt from my second extraction. Very positive experience. This was 2 days before Christmas, i remember pretty well. Breakthrough on 0.05 spice, two big hits, my smoking technique starts to get somewhat better. I turned into the glass-like pyramid room, and felt the presence of the Wizard again. This time he speaks very emotionally to the Mother Goddess. I can't remember pretty much from the experience, but i was left with the impression of love, gratitude and care. Really, really positive experience.
Eleventh experience :Christmas evening. Sandwiched 0.06 g spice with 0.1 lime in the bong. I remember i made two hits, and the second one was really, really big one. At some point, as i was inhaling really slow, i noticed the smoked turned yellowish, cloudy, but the tryptamine had started it effect and i left the bong on the bed and was just trying to set my mind to handle what will happen from now on. This was my most shocking experience. I had a breakthrough shortly after inhaling the second big hit. It was really deep hit. I can't recall much from being at hyperspace, but might have been there for about 2-3 minutes. Really can't remember anything particular about it. Don't know
if the Wizard or any other entity met me this time. All i remember : Suddenly as i sit, i feel that something very wrong is going on with my body. My mouth started moving in an uncoordinated manner. I thought i start to suffocate, that some very bad intoxication from the lye has damaged my brain. I felt the lack of oxygen. I instinctively tried to move around, to get myself 'sober' faster from the tryptamine. I could feel the lack of oxygen in my body. For the first time in my dmt-experiences, i stood up, and once i was in upright position i could feel the dizzyness and the lack of oxygen. The most frightening thing for me was that i could see that i vomit pieces of my entrails, pieces of white meat. I thought i am suffocating, i am going to die now, unless i do something. At some point i could see it was not my guts that go out of my mouth, but saliva, and it was quite WHITE saliva, and i got scared that my brain is intoxicated with lye or naphtha and now i am going to pass out. I was doing some uncoordinated moves with my mouth as if someone that has no control over their body. That really scared the hell out of me and made my ego started fighting the trip out. I instinctively started waving hands in order to regain control over my body , if i recall correctly i had no muscle control over my tongue, and this was the scariest part. I keep a bottle of water on the floor, and i remember i saw it and went down to grab it , but lowering my head made things just more difficult. Then i got pretty scared and started mumbling in some sort of made-up native-american language, just to show my awe and respect for the spirits, i was asking them to help me out. And suddenly I realized they wanted me to have that scary experience. I felt i was told "This is what your scary Ayahuasca trip would be like". At that moment i was kneeling on the floor, my head was spinning, overall feel was like a heavy sub-breakthrough, strong OEV's, kaleidoscopic fractals were transforming everywhere i looked. This moment i was so scared, because the DMT spirit showed that is quite more powerful that my human mind could imagine. I was being taught a lesson of my intellectual approach towards the spiritual experience is not necessary and blocks me from fully enjoying it. I was shown that i don't need to try to adjust the experience idiosyncratically. I felt as if I were left in some sort of isolated space. I could see my surroundings, but the spirit just wanted me to show how powerful they are. I could get on my feet i a few minutes, during that time i was still kneeling and mumbling in a glossolalia-fashion to show the spirits my awe and respect. I was asking them to get me back to my human reality. Even though a pretty shattering experience it was a lesson learned. As i was kneeling on the ground, tears were coming down my eyes. I was just praying, literally praying to the spirits to help me out. While i was with the feel with being imprisoned in that cosmic vacuum, where no one will ever hear from me, i could still feel the presence of a very ancient entity, that was currently giving its lesson to me. I remember i hit my head on the floor, not by a physical fatigue, but by a psychological one. Once i realized that i have no power over the dmt experience, that i should not try to control it, i felt instant insight of magic power. As if i were given a potion of mana just because i have been tested by that ancient spirit. This was his way of making humans more close to the spiritual realms of the spice. Even though the scariest experience, this one had the most close to shamanic type of insight for me. I was literally taken into a spiritual battle, which showed me how great the spirits are. Suddenly after receiving this potion of mana, i could feel an immense increase in visual acuity and my physical strength and coordination over my body to come back to normal. OEV's of kaleidoscopic fractals were still going on and in them i was shown the fierce, predator aspect of the World. It was the hunter-skill and intuition that this spirit had rewarded me with!
What this could have been? I haven't smoked after that experience? I know there is a chance unwanted material was trapped into crystal formation - whether lye, naphtha or something else. Although that second batch was re-xed once.
I do not intend of smoking before I've re-xed it three times. Just want to make sure i've cleaned it up as much as possible.
Other thing that i suspect that might have caused this quite disturbing experience is my breathing. I do not have asthma or epileptic problems, i do sports on a daily basis for quite a few years and can say i am in a overall good physical state. Although i notice that after a breakthrough i "might" forget to breathe. Is it possible that lack of oxygen has caused that panic and has made my ego to fight the trip?
So overall i've got two guesses what have might caused that scary trip it might have been just my ego too scared of going so deep, or an intoxication by my spice.
Now i've got myself lab grade chemicals for my next extractions - NaCl, NaOH and Acetone - lab grade clean, used for analysis. I am just trying to figure out how to make a different cap for my bottle, so that lye does not touch it while i am shaking the mix. I also want to get more info on how to re-x the spice in a better way. But ill share on that in another thread!
Hope my beginner's experience with extraction and trips will contribute to this great community!
Blessings All!