I think it all started when I took mushrooms. I have a topic about it in one of my previous posts. It did not feel exactly similar to what I experienced on DMT and 2ce though.
I got a chance to do DMT in July. I have done it previously but never broke though. In the span of the next 3 months I had broken though 3 times, all were frightening similar experiences. When I was under I remember feeling like I had just messed up and had extreme feeling of dread. It isn't really explainable to what I had felt but it was like something kept telling me that I had "messed up, shouldn't have done it, broke the universe" (I also have a topic on this). My third breakthrough was somewhat like that to but I was actually less scared then my first or second but the same feeling was still there. I was able to actually think and wonder what my body will be like in the physical world since I thought I was stuck forever. Really a traumatic experience.
Then comes the 2ce months later. I decided to take some 2ce, which had given me a really weird trip. I didn't feel like I was tripping most of the time yet I still had an extremely explainable psychedelic experience. I was laying in bed and just randomly had this image pop into my head of a guy or something walking from behind a waist high wall or something. It kept repeating over and over again. When I closed my eyes it would be a lot more intense. It just wouldn't stop. With that repeating, I would get a wave of dread. I will provide that trip report at the end which I wrote when coming down. What really freaked me out though is sometime later, maybe a month or two. I smoked some weed and was laying in bed when this same exact image popped into my head. The same feeling of dream accompanied it and was on repeat the same exact way it did when I was on 2ce. I had to distract myself by watching videos on youtube which eventually made it go away. Read my 2ce report to get the exact idea of what I had experienced. Sorry for the length.
Quote:I have a friend whose name will be “I, my, he” for short. I had insufflated about 20mg of 2ce over the course of 2 hours. The trip felt kind of simple and didn’t wow him for the first couple of hours. More like for the first 4-5 hours. I just felt like I was in an extremely alien headspace that didn’t feel like my own, as with any psychedelics. It was definitely trippy and interesting but he wasn’t getting any closed eye visuals. I began to think that I might have a good reaction to the chemical. After browsing the web and playing GTA for 4-5 hours, I felt sober. He thought that the trip is over because he was just feeling weird and like he was coming down. He decided to drive to his dealers and buy some weed and then the smoke shop for some smokes and a bong stem. When he started driving is when he realized he is still tripping pretty tough. Driving was extremely easy though, everything I did was smooth and my speed was perfect, I felt like I had full control of everything and I could see every driver and person.
After getting home I made a Gatorade waterfall bong and ripped a fat bowl in it. After smoking, I definitely felt way more fucked up. I lay back down in his bed and listened to 3d audio. I started with the Luigi’s barber shop one which felt really realistic. Though it wasn’t as crazy as what started happening next. I clicked on a related link after the video had finished and it was called “Holophonic Sounds - Tricking Your Mind To See Alternate Realities.” This one felt different. As soon as I got the idea of creating realities and actually focusing on the sound and really imagining, every sound I heard after that manifested itself in my head. I was literally able to see sounds moving into images, objects and crazy landscapes. The video basically has multiple different recording of different scenarios and one of them had to be a really creepy sounding lady speaking a different language and it literally felt like she came up to my ears and started whispering. I knew what I see next to me isn’t real so I didn’t really panic but still got a bad vibe from it.
After hearing that voice, I started experiencing a bizarre flashback type hallucination every time I would close my eyes now. The flashback was what looked, or felt, like a 2-3 second clip that he was seeing from almost every angle. It was a flash of a middle aged man walking and passing or throwing something. It felt like I was there and not in my body each time this happened. This flash would keep happening, making him feel uneasy. This flash or memory or whatever you want to call it also carried some kind of negative feeling energy. Every time I would see it I felt this heavy dread and sadness. It was like an attached file that had to be there with this clip. I tried everything, watching a video, listening to music sitting in complete silence and nothing seemed to get that flash out of my head. I began to realize that this must mean something. It felt way too urgent to just keep trying to keep my eyes open.
This time I closed my eyes and slowly eased myself into watching this event unfold. Each time I didn’t try to avoid it I felt like I could see more of the clip. It wasn’t physical at all, yet I could see this man with many different faces, hairstyles, clothes. I started to question who he is and why I feel so much dread associated with this flashback. Is it bad? Is something going to happen? SWIM started to think about his family and friends and kind of read of good vibes or bad vibes from each thought. Random thoughts began to stand out, like the name Carl for the man that I kept seeing. I tried to think of other names and make them stand out like Carl but none of them would come remotely close. The name was Carl. It was spelling out in my head as I kept seeing more and more unfold. There was more and more progression which would show that I somehow am associated with Carl. I remember sitting somewhere with this same energy but in a completely different space than the original flashbacks location. I got more info such as a balding hairstyle and the number 40, which I believe is his age.
I got these repeating flashbacks probably more than 100 instances in the hour or so I was experiencing them. They only somehow abruptly stopped after I wrote down the characteristics in the notes app on my phone. As soon as I finished typing on his phone, it all went away. It felt like SWIMs mind had been put to rest. Maybe it was the future? Or something in SWIMS psych that needed/needs to be released. I am very positive it was a vision of the future. It just felt so real in an indescribable way. There is just so much more that I missed out on this but I feel like there is just too much detail. Right now I am still slightly tripping and the memories are all very fresh and vivid. I came out of this trip with a million dollar idea too which hopefully I pursue and find reasonable and possible on a fully sober mind later today… All in all I LOVED this whole experience. Sorry for the confusing references to me and scattered details lol
I just want to know if all of this means something and what I should do about it. I randomly think about it and finally decided to post a topic for opinions. Thanks
