PREAMBLE:
I have never written an experience report after any drug experience before, however this specific DMT experience certainly deserves one. Before describing the experience (as much as it is possible to describe a DMT experience) I feel I must tell a bit about myself to convey the full brevity of the experience. Skip over if you don't care. I am a 24 year old male who has been experimenting (heavily) with all sorts of hallucinogens/DMT since age 18. I have probably had hundreds, if not thousands, of previous DMT experiences. Yet they all pale in comparison to what I witnessed this time around. Previous to this trip, I had taken a two-year hiatus from DMT. Other (horrible) drugs infected my life and caused painful addictions, all of which I have recovered from at this point. DMT has a way of leaving your life when the nasty drugs enter. However, I knew I was ready to have DMT reintroduced into my life after becoming clean and breaking my old habits, and so I finally acquired about 1g.
I have never been a religious person, and still am not. However, after this experience, I have had an undeniable "spiritual awakening" and something in my soul is different than before. I will go into more detail after the actual report.
EXPERIENCE:
I never weigh out DMT. A (very) large pile of DMT was loaded into my light-bulb vaporizer. I have perfected the technique of smoking DMT through a light-bulb and breakthrough 90% of the time now with absolutely no bad smoke taste or harshness (takes about 3-4 consecutive hits). After hitting the DMT, the typical effects were noted. Dissolution of reality, laying back and closing eyes, becoming totally overpowered by my surroundings and what was happening inside my brain/soul. However, this time something was different. VERY VERY different. Silence filled my reality. The totality of the energy of the experience became hyper-focused on a single point. This point was moving incredibly gracefully. It was exhibiting the most beautiful movements of any object I had ever seen before. It was almost "dancing". Then, the most remarkable thing that has ever happened in my life came to be. This object, I realized, was not an object. It was a being. An entity. I had encountered the DMT entities before (or elves, if you will) but this was different. This entity was assigned to me. It opened a direct telepathic communication portal to me and was giving me INCREDIBLY SPECIFIC messages (that were later comprehended in english after the experience was over). It was letting me know (all instantly) that it knew me. It knew my soul, my brain, my body. It was watching over me, and always had been, throughout my entire life. I felt the most profound sense of connection to another being that I had ever felt. We fit together perfectly and became one mind, but two different hearts, throughout the duration of the experience. It's movements were guiding me through the universe (but not the physical universe). It was alive, definitively, but not in our sense of the word. It exists on a much higher level. I will never understand the plane of existence this being exists on, but that was not the purpose of the joining of our minds. The purpose was to make me aware of it's existence. The places we went are sort of forgettable, as many aspects of DMT experiences are. The feelings and the connection are permanent. It MADE me become aware of it's incredible energy, it's higher level of evolution as a being, it's higher level of authority in this universe, and it's absolute LOVE for me (this was the most incredible thing I have ever felt in my heart). I was so awe-struck I couldn't believe my mind's eye. After presenting itself to me in a twirl of ponderous energy dancing and allowing me to join with it's incredible mind (and humbling me in every sense of word), it gently severed the connection it had opened into my soul and released me back into my body. The awareness of my eyelids slowly came to me. I instantly longed to re-open the connection with this being, but it was clear to me that it was gone in an instant. My time with this hyper-entity had ended. I opened my eyes to a swirl of incredible distortion and fractalization of my surroundings. I realized I had hands, then knees, then feet. I said out loud "I have a body again!" in disbelief. I sat up, and was still tripping incredibly hard, trying to process the fact that I had just communicated with something that's intelligence was beyond anything a human can ever achieve, and that this being had been watching me (specifically) since I had been born, and loved me. This was a spiritual shock that I am still experiencing days after the trip. I slowly came down completely and just sat in silence for an hour or so, with chills running down my spine ever so often and I contemplated whether this being was real or not, and whether or not it still existed on some plane after my DMT trip was over, and knowing resoundingly within my soul that the answers to these questions were (are) both yes.
CONCLUSION AND AFTER-THOUGHTS:
Later, after describing this experience to a friend, he mentioned the movie "Mission to Mars". I told him this experience was strikingly similar to what those astronauts experienced once they arrived at Mars and met with the aliens there. The scenery was different, of course, but the feelings were the same as what those astronauts seemed to be feeling in the movie. Feelings of "WOW, I can't believe this is really happening, I can't believe this is real, I can't believe I am talking directly to an alien being 100000x times more powerful, old, knowledgeable, and wise than myself, I can't believe it wants to show me these beautiful things about existence, (and then) I can't believe I have to leave this otherworldly experience behind and return to Earth"
I have never bought into any belief of any God as organized religion describes it. I have never had any direct communication with a higher power than myself. I have never been opposed to the idea that there could be a higher power than myself in this world, but have never been presented with any concrete evidence that points to this conclusion specifically, and so I have remained (up until this point) open minded but doubtful.
My life will never be the same after this experience. I no longer have any doubt that there is a higher power than myself. I still do not know the details of this higher power (ie. whether or not it is the same for everyone, whether or not it created the physical realm/earth/etc, whether or not it created me), but none of these details are important to me right now. I know this being I met with is real, I know it is not a manifestation of my own mind during severe hallucinogenic stress, I know it has a soul, and I know it has been there my entire life, loves me, and will be there forever after this experience. I cannot tell you how I know these things, besides the anecdotal evidence I have presented, and I have no desire for anyone to believe me or not believe me. I have this in my heart now, and I will have it until I die, and that is incredibly valuable to me. I will continue to contemplate this incredible thing I have just witnessed and I thank you for reading.