Salt,
I have no easy answers for you. Oh, and welcome to the Nexus!
Now, with your level of experience, I am wondering if you maybe noticed something about DMT that I have noticed, ride be wonderful or hellish . . . DMT IS the embodiment of true NOVELTY. Even if the themes are the same, each and every experience I have is novel in some significant way from not only any other DMT or psychedelic experience but also from anything in my regular life. Now that is a BIG level of novelty and alienness, imo.
So, it's never easy, never predictable. And this is one of the reasons I love it and keep coming back for more (though my rate is WAY down these days - to two to three blasts a year).
With all the rides I've taken I've also noticed that DMT is pure reflection for me. Reflection of my deep mind contents, synaesthetically illustrated. Funny that I can say that concommitantly with the fundamental novelty and alienness,

. Ah, DMT.
This trip though dark and deep sounds like a HUGE opportunity for integration and growth to me. You were told the man sitting next to you was police. This is your concerns over illegal behavior (vis a vis mainstream society) and getting "caught," right? For me this would go all the way back to childhood if I looked closely. I don't know you but it's worth looking at right?
You were given a taste of separation from your family . . . . again something to take a look at and examine imo. How potentially terrifying. What would that mean? Of course, change, death and loss come to us all so we need to figure out a way to make peace with that . . . some never do, some embrace religion, some meditate and work on acceptance, there are many ways.
Anyway I'm just trying to suggest you have an opportunity for work, growth and deep integration with this. I hope you will use it.
Peace
"But even if nothing lasts and everything is lost, there is still the intrinsic value of the moment. The present moment, ultimately, is more than enough, a gift of grace and unfathomable value, which our friend and lover death paints in stark relief."-Rick Doblin, Ph.D. MAPS President, MAPS Bulletin Vol. XX, No. 1, pg. 2Hyperspace LOVES YOU