This is my 2nd test experience with DMT freebase; 25mg vaporized in the late evening low-light setting of my bedroom. I meditated a bit prior, lit incense, and listened to one of my favorite online playlists called "Psybient" on the Songza app. I had a light meal earlier in the day and had no other drugs in my system.
After inhaling and exhaling the dose, the same strange numb excitation (paradox?) saturates my entire body. I focus on the environment of my room while seated on my bed to observe visual changes, I have a black bookcase across from the bed where I'm seated filled with my favorite literature, the words on the bindings of the books become unreadable and foreign, each letter a beautiful symbol but ultimately meaningless without a fixed reference and I'm struck by what a inadequate job verbal and written language does in communicating individual experience. I remember learning in college about how verbal language only encompasses maybe 15-20% of communication. Anyhow, I digress...
After watching the top and sides of the bookcase warp impossibly inward, I lay back and closed my eyes to see a similar sea of organic fractals writhing and spinning, akin to my first experience. Same intricate animal cell-like patterns of grays and browns with specks of primary color, except that this time each cell held a definite opened eye at its nucleus, tens of thousands (or hundreds of thousands?) of perfectly identical eyes staring at me. The music I was listening to at the time seemed to stretch and elongate into one drawn out note elevating to a soft ringing in my head. There was also a strange buzzing sound, lower in frequency, dancing around the room.
The writhing sea of eyes organized into a vortex and at the center of the vortex there grew the most gorgeous shade of electric blue in the distance. This formed into a silhouette of a humanoid figure where every hue and shade of blue was evaporating off of the figure like wisps of thin smoke. It appeared that the figure was "punched-out" of the eyeball-fractal space like a hole and the ethereal vapors were spilling in from another side. I was very much compelled to move towards it and explore what it was but the vortex soon closed and the blue silhouette figure was gone to my disappointment.
Then something shifted, like a new dimension of space a step up from 3D, and I was in a (4 dimensional?) cavern that was very large where two spaces occupied the same space (I know that makes no sense, but I suppose that is the problem with attempting to write objectively about a subjective experience, a lot of paradox and nonsensical ideas). Here the walls of the 3D "space" were the writhing eyeball-fractals and the walls or "essence" of this new 4D space had a pale-pinkish mucous membrane like appearance. There was a large creature or something that resided in this new space, of the same pinkish color as the cavern and I got the impression it was hiding via camouflage, sleeping, or else totally disinterested in me. I was unable to focus my awareness on it as the eyeball fractals pulled my full attention back to the fractal space and started "folding" in on themselves, consolidating eyes with each shift of folding in the sea of cells until just one rather horrifying eyeball remained staring at me with a half-lidded gaze. It was kind of like this one eye became the "head" in the sea of organic mass like a worm or snake and started to move towards me in a slow, drippy sort of way. I wanted nothing to do with this thing coming towards me! It seemed so alien and primal, neither malicious nor benign, but I instinctually rejected it for some reason. I was able to dissipate the eye consciously and it "smeared" and then I tried to open my eyes, becoming acutely aware of my breath. It seemed like I was seeing the environment of my room through my eyes by something was off, like I was seeing from a little off to the side of my real head.
So I kept my "eyes" open and became more aware of my body laying there on the bed, it felt like I was tethered to my body at the chest and neck, like the bottom half of me was flailing off to the side of my physical body and down inside the bed, and my head a little off to the right of my physical head. A very bizarre feeling and I was forcing myself to breath and feel my chest rise where I was "tethered". It kind of felt like maybe drowning would feel or being suffocated by a weight on my chest and neck. I felt that I would die if I didn't focus on breathing. I just kept forcing myself to breath.
As the dose subsided it became easier and easier to breath and I soon felt like I was wholly in my physical body again laying comfortable on the bed. I felt vibrantly alive and breathing felt exquisite and I had an invigorating body high the rest of the night.
-EM
"If you're frightened of dying, and you're holding on, you'll see devils tearing your life away. If you've made your peace, then the devils are really angels, freeing you from the earth" Jacob's Ladder