Recently, I wrote about one of my first trips. It was an anxiety ride through blackness. And I believe that the spice was giving me a hard time to uproot past, dark experiences I have had. I almost died when I was three from jumping off the top of some bleachers, I have had strange natural psychedelic experiences that I tried to bury before I got involved with taking psyches. I can pretty much say I am an alcoholic and that it was also giving me the Poison experience for this reason. Lot's of bleak shit in my psyche.

Ever since that bad trip I have not been the same. Buzzing in my ears, I feel like the center of my brain is roomier, and breathing it is alive somehow. Trouble concentrating and the feeling like I could almost jump out of my body any second. This has been giving me unbearable anxiety since this experience at work, my hands get that rubber muscle "too much acid" feeling. So, I have been trying to eat healthier, get rest and I started praying to this "space" that is in the middle of my head... and it is making me feel better?

Do other people experience this? Do other people pray? I don't believe in any religion at this point and time. The experience is so intense that is almost feels like prayer should be involved. What do you think?

I believe that if you say to yourself I am going to get better, in a way you are willing things to work that direction. Which is actually the opposite of prayer. People pray to god to have him change things or impose his will on things when in all actuality it's possible that it's actually your will that is doing the work.

i'd imagine wishing on a four-leaf clover would give a similar outcome as prayer.
some people toss salt over their shoulder.

Maybe you guys aren't understanding what I mean. Maybe prayer is a bad term, I guess I'm speaking about meditating. Think about it more like that.

then just say meditation. prayer makes it seem like you're beseeching a mythical character.
technically, prayer is supposed to embody meditation, but it's traditionally based on mythical figures and superstition..
"now I lay me down to sleep.."

I guess it works for some, but it would be similar to beseeching the spirit of the Lorax.
it's all mental.

meditation is great, a real refresher. takes a good bit of discipline, but it's like a recalibration of the mind. inner focus.

Haha "some people toss salt over their shoulder" this made me laugh

complacentnation:



In my most humble opinion there is nothing wrong with the word prayer or the action of praying....In my mind meditation is prayer, but that is only because I perceive a Creator force. I know some people see prayer as a dirty word and they only think prayer it is some pointless and superstitious activity..

I have had extensive psychedelic experience during my life and "prayer" has always worked for me.

I believe prayer is pure inner silence, I also believe this is what the creator wants from us is to be silent so that we may become fully aware of the glory of creation.

I believe the mistake is that people tend to think prayer is what you see the televangelists preachers doing on late Night TV.

Maybe I'm just incredibly superstitious but In my opinion disbelief of a creator is it's own far out superstition.

Here is some scientific data on prayer:

http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2010/12/101214085328.htm


Take care,
-Elijah

just curious, what style of me-tation do you practice?

solution preparation.

If prayer makes you feel better than I would continue to do it.Integration can be tricky and anything that helps you I say do it.I dont really have anyone to share my experiences,or offer me advice about any of it in my day to day life.Which is why I love the nexus.

So for me coming here reading and writing reports have helped me greatly.I also listen to alot of Alan Watts after my first few experiences and helped me gain perspective and get back on track.Whatever works

Hmm quite anomalous of you, as the others are all dissolution prep.

As all compounded things are subject to blah blah blah

I'm going to take a stab in another direction here. When I meditate, and meditate constantly for 20 minutes each day, I get to a point in which I start to feel very similar bodily sensations as those felt on the come-up to DMT. Prayer/meditation or whatever you want to call it does appear to either release DMT, or have some similar effect. There have been psychonautic reports coming form monks who meditate constantly.

I concur with this sediment. I had a natural experience that was quite unpleasant but was psychedelic. It was what had me researching for causes and I came up with DMT. That natural experience was brought on through prayer and it scared the shit out of me. Like my head was praying and all of a sudden I was about to burst through the blackness.

After having a bad DMT trip, it felt like when I closed my eyes I could feel & see this same effect of about to burst through the blackness. Praying/meditating to whatever was there gave me chills and seemed to point in a direction of hope since it just made me feel better. I'm not saying I know what it is... it's just like this aware blackness.

Consequently, I realized I made a bad mistake which might & probably did bring on the bad trip. Having smoked about 80mg in the pipe I loaded another 30mg in without cleaning the pipe. WHOOPS. I hit all 30mg & whatever waste products were in there in one huge hit. The way it affected my head for a couple of days was insane. Meditating, eating well, not drinking, sleeping well healed whatever the fuck I had done to myself. LOL. I'm all good now a full five days later.