...The Following is a short story i imagined the other night

It consists of quite a journey, Ego dissolution, managing to "Offend" Lady-aya (she forgave me)having my right arm 'possessed' by some other conciousness, and even some Past-Life-regression...It's quite a long read but i've tried to make it as readable as possible but at the very least its a detailed account for me to remember but it's always worth sharing these things.

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9.05pm: 180mg caapi copy [equivelant to around 35g of vine)
9.45pm: 1 g cubensis soaked in Lemon juice for 20 mins and then drunk with added orange-juice.

I began with watching a Kundalini video for half an hour to get me feeling relaxed and my energy centers open but it was a Very slow come up which led me to doubt I had eaten enough cubes.I was Eagerly waiting the arrival of Mama-Aya (which i'll refer to as “her” or “she” for the most part) and the arrival of any of the other spirits that were in my presence the last time I journeyed.

Over the course of maybe 2 hours, I feel things building up and delirium setting in. disorientation grows as my mind tries to reference it's responses. I eventually feel and see the presence of Her in the various guises and forms she can take.

We open a direct dialogue which I felt more consciously aware of than the last Psilohuasca experience.This was one of my intentions for this voyage....to actively engage in the experience and instigate conversations and ask more questions as apposed to just having the experience happen to me.

Over the next few hours my shadow/ego was being pushed up to the surface as our dialogue continues. The 'narrator' aspect of my psyche/ego becomes too persistent and it starts to become a 'burden' to the experience as it tries to grasp what it can from the visions and translate it for it's self.

Piece by piece i'm having my entire Psyche placed in the fore font of my mind and perception. Confusion level and resistance is high at this point.

I begin reliving the emotions experienced of anything that i have created for myself in my life which hasn't served my greater good...Including the ways in which i have acted towards people and towards myself. I jump between semi-conciously 'conversing' with Her, and between more of my own cyclic personal issues i'm being forced to deconstruct. Areas that need healing, forgiveness, retrospect, understanding.

At one point, during the depth of my ego 'activation', she stands on my chest and my ego perceives this as a kind of taunt. She was right to do so as at this point,my ego was still resisting responsibility for all of my thought.

She then put her foot in my mouth which In that moment, i perceived as her taunting my inability to face what I was.

In one idiotic moment of reckless abandon and egoic display, I retaliated to her 'taunt' by licking her foot in a kind of provocative ,chauvinistic and arrogant way. Less than a second after I had done this ,I realized how disrespectful I had been and a deep deep deep shame and sense of despair enveloped me. She was no longer 'there' and I genuinely thought I had ruined my chances of ever speaking with her further.

This continued for a few minutes and the shame of what I had done and temporary sense of 'abandonment', triggered more of my ego to respond. She returned eventually momentarily and was slightly angry but with more of disappointed and surprised overtone at my lack of manners and respect. I knew very well that my visions could of got a lot more darker if she had a Wrathful side, but that fear was unjustified as the only real thing my ego had to worry about, was facing more of it's self.

I apologized but the trauma was still present and this was causing more of my self to be put to the forefront and I hopped back ,between realizing the effect of my actions to people and the relationships in my life.

This continued for quite some time and I was now firmly in the depths of my own insanity as the mental,emotional and visual language constructs began to disintegrate into one chaotic stream and make less and less sense to me.

The ultra concentrated and refined stream of consciousness continued to flow and I was floating in and out of presence and occasionally loosing all reference of myself and anything. this continued for a while and i felt a purge apporaching, but it never came. Instead i had to navigate to the toilet countless times to pee as my body was cleansed.

After some amount of time in this pure disorientation, in what seemed to appear out of no where ,A light symbol on my bedroom wall started to captivate me. As in, really really captivate me beyond rational mind. At this point, She, and/or either some of the other spirits that were with me ,also showed their surprise and curiosity to the symbol that had caught my attention.




What followed was even weirder...This symbol telepathically made it's self known as a kind of off-planet Egyptian supreme consciousness /creator god of some sort... and then it “possessed' my right arm.

My right arm moved on it's own controlled by this force. I'm basically laying on my bed, with my arm standing up-right in the same shape as the symbol on the wall, with my thumb to index finger and all fingers touching and the hand at an almost right angle.

This consciousness/entity was looking back at me through my arm all while having complete movement control of my limb.

It noticed my left arm was positioned backwards on to msyelf with my left hand on my shoulder and it moved to pick my left hand up and did some kind of strange energetic transfer which made me feel the left/right balance in my body. I was in the presence of whatever this consciousness was and at one point , my mouth opened and RA said his name through me in a very slow extended way. (I can't remember if that happened before or after the arm thing and I cant remember just how long my arm was upright as this conciousnes but it felt like quite a while.)

I can't quite remember the exact ordering of the chain of events afterwards as it was all jumble but I continued to have more soul realizations and I directly realized who some of my Soul-family and Kin are in this incarnation. I realized directly that 2 people i know in my life ,I was related to in past lives and it was such a staggering realization, that I actually burst into tears.

It felt like being reunited with long lost relatives and I felt a huge sense of relief that I have more family out there, in this life, who I had been related to in past lives.
The 2 friends, one I believe was my brother, and another ,my sister during the time of Atlantis. I've only known my past-life-sister (current life friend) since around March, but we had an instant connection and i actually just rang her to tell her about my experience and she had been to see a shaman/soul-retriever medicine lady last night and she was asked if she had a brother and connections to Greece to which she had no recollection about so hearing that from her confirmed it even more.

The significance of this is that I realized I had known my girlfriend from Atlantis times, egytpian times ,an ancient era of hindusim but also in ancient greek times where I believe I was once a Satyr and she was also possibly a Satyress/Nymph.(Satyrs are half man with bottom half Goat...troop/tribe of followers of Dionysus, God of wine and Ritual Ecstacy/celebration/wilderness )

In the past few months, week, and during this experience 2 day ago, night, i've actually realized about 8 separate past life incarnations and it now feels as if it's my 'task' to coherently incorporate and balance all of the unfinished 'lessons' and aspects of these into my current self.

After this happened, I was in contact with An Ancestral tribe of some kind and I saw a vision of them in a few compact moments. ( I had only seen 1 ancestor in my last Psilouascha voyage) I got conveyed the sense they were extremely pleased (in a very authentic tribal kind of way) that in this moment of time, Souls,tribes,cultures and essentially, families were re-uniting back together.

I believe that all past Civilizations Echo via soul Re-incarnation and that some of us have been here on Earth for different amounts of time than others. Some are old souls, and some are very new souls with very few past lifes/karma behind them. I believe Karma is an inbuilt universal law of sorts that ensures the direction of a Soul's progress. I believe with the come up to Dec2012, there is a convergence of timelines and reuniting of the separate civilizations,tribes that consist of this current world's population.

After a while I, re-experienced my 5 year old self and I let out a nice big extended laugh. It wasnt' a memory of my 5 year old self laughing, it was my 5 year old self becoming me and laughing in that moment which felt absolutely amazing to re-live my child-hood 'character' and feel exactly as i did with my 5 year old mind playing/laughing.

In the same fashion as the last voyage I took, towards the end of the experience, the Caapi started to decrease it's intensity to allow the mushroom to show it's presence more. i was then in the presence of a Beautiful small Faerie/pixie. I almost kissed my lips as if to blow a kiss at it but managed to stop myself after remembering the mishap with Lady-Aya earlier in the night. It wouldn't of been in the same way as before had I done that though, it's just that these creatures are Beeee-autiful

I hadn't seen her for a while, but I finally saw the true face of Lady-aya as she returned... I must ask for her 'name' to be spoken to me next time or something to call her because Lady-Aya/Mama-Aya doesn't sound natural for me when saying it.

She looked very Royal and majestic but also completely natural. Earlier in the night, she wasn't showing her true form but rather taking other forms although im sure many of these forms are aspects of her, but maybe my ego had projected it's own limitations of my perception of her when I was still battling my inner self. She gave me the impression of a a True etheric Gaian 'Queen'/mother-teacher. I expressed my deep deep love and gratitude to her and was so thankful that she had Forgiven me for what had happened earlier.She expressed a positive reaction to me and this was the last time i saw her for the night i think

The whole experience gradually winded down from there onwards (after turning around to see my cushion as the Sphinx,and seeing the image of a hindu Deity and the Buddha in my visions of course ) I stayed up the next day with positive interactions with my family again.

There is a Lot for me to process at the moment but i'm completely completely completely humbled and in awe/love at what I had experienced. Both the personal healing of the various aspects of my self ,and the perspective on my current and past-life family and friends. I also feel honored to have had the contact with Egyptian & off planet Consciousness that had been through me. Now my task is to integrate what I have been shown and recently experiencing and to smooth out any unresolved karmic lessons and incarnations to clear the path for this most current incarnation that I-Am.

Smiling in Anticipation

much-love.