I did my first MHRB extraction last year and the nexus has been a fantastic resource,I don't think I would have tried without the invaluable information gleaned here.

I've been smoking enhanced leaf in a small glass bong and have had some great experiences,although I've had problems with recall. Although this seems to be quite common from reports I've read.So I've wanted to try ayahuasca for a while,so I ordered some yellow caapi a few weeks ago.I had 250g which I brewed for 3x3hours and reduced down to 500ml. I figured that would be easy to dose,100ml for 50g equivalent.

It's been sat in my fridge and I've been waiting for the right time to drink.I went out to the pub after work yesterday and had a few beers.I don't drink much at all and so I could feel the effects,although far from being out of control. One of my friends turned up and gave me a lift home,he's smoked DMT a few times and so we decided to have a couple of pipes,the usual anxiety I get before smoking was gone,dutch courage I suppose. We had a good time,nowhere near breakthrough doses but very enjoyable and very funny also.

When he left I felt the time was right to try the caapi,so I measured out 50g and drank.45 minutes later I dissolved 30mg of freebase in a glass of cranberry juice and drank that and added another 20g of caapi.Things get a little hazy now but I remember feeling the dmt starting to take effect,I was getting all the geometric open eyed visuals that I associate with smoked freebase but this felt so much deeper. I had some nausea but didn't feel like being sick really. It was beginning to come on really strong and so I decided to go upstairs to be near to the bathroom and I thought it might be good to be near my bed.

When I stood up I was really unsteady on my feet but I managed to get upstairs somehow,I went to the bathroom and although I was feeling like I might need to purge I didn't. The other end was a different matter though and I had a major bout of diarrhea,by this point I was really out of it and the walls and floor were distorting and I felt really hot also,I took all my clothes off and put on a dressing gown and got into bed.Things were getting scary and I kept entering loops of thought,lots of which I can't remember. I was starting to think that I was in real trouble,although in between loops I was able to tell myself "ride it out,you know you'll be fine" but the intensity was like nothing I'd ever experienced.I actually remember at one point thinking about this thread https://www.dmt-nexus.me...aspx?g=posts&t=30315 Thanks to everyone that contributed to that,I really think that helped me keep a handle on things.

I got up again out of bed and went downstairs,I was really thirsty and drunk some water,all the time wondering where I was and what the hell was going on. Even though I had real sensory overload,there was no CEV's or "journeying" I did feel that I was right on the edge of sanity though,I was laughing to myself at points too! I started to come out of the real intense stage a little and began to get a bit worried in case I had been making a noise and might have been heard by my neighbours. I thought it would be a good idea to have some music to act as background noise but putting a cd in the stereo was out of the question. I picked up the remote for the tv but it made no sense to me and I was pressing buttons with no result. I took a bottle of water and went back to bed as that seemed like the safest place. I wanted a drink of water but I couldn't work out how to lift up the bottle,and I got stuck in a loop with that for a little while.

After a bit(I've got no idea of timescale) I started to feel a little better and that's when the introspection began,I think I can begin to understand what people mean by the healing qualities of Aya. It was an incredibly valuable time in which I really began to get the message and once the fear went there was an amazing sense of understanding and it was of great personal value. I finally dropped off to sleep and woke this morning with a splitting headache,a hangover from the drinks I had in the evening. That was a huge mistake and something I will never do again,I've actually felt poisoned by the alcohol today.

I'm still having effects now and I've done a lot of thinking over the last 18 hours or so. It really is an amazing medicine and I'm looking forward to working with it in future,with a great deal of respect too. The next time I drink I will plan and prepare with the respect that Aya so clearly deserves.

To come out the other side of an experience like that is very empowering for me,I was in a bad way for a while and wasn't sure if I was coming back,I feel ultimately that maybe these experiences are the most valuable ones of all. I have a long way to go though I know,but that was quite an introduction!