i apologize if this is drawn out, but i'm taking the situation pretty seriously until i think i shouldn't, & feel that the devil most likely for sure is hiding in amongst my details...
anyway...
i became pretty convinced that my date died last weekend... as she didn't, and is currently fine, i've been quietly researching on my own, but i've not found anything that satisfactorily answers my questions... i've learned quite a bit from you guys without asking anything, but i'm at wit's end here & could use a little help... so here we go...
JoAnn (not her name) has been an acquaintance for several years... she sought me out, asked me if i know anything about dmt, if it was something i could find... i'm not a drug dealer, just a guy who's been a bartender in the same small town for the best part of 2 decades... if you live where i live, and you alter your consciousness, there's a good chance we know each other... social networking is not a new concept, we were doing it at bars long before Al Gore invented the internet... anyway, she came to the right guy... i told her that yes, i could arrange for her to partake, but that it had to be done under my conditions, one of which is that the spice does not leave my possession... i'll gift a bit here & there to select friends, but that's a real, real small circle... so i told her to eat a light meal at noon saturday & that i'd pick her up at 7... & i did... we went to a bar, had one beer a piece over conversation... she is on no medications, has no abnormal medical conditions... she's a tall girl, about 6 feet... i don't know how much she weighs, wouldn't venture to guess, but suffice it to say she is very fit, a pretty much perfect physical specimen... (very, very attractive to boot.).. she's a pre-school teacher, very spiritual in a hippie-esq manner... mid-twenties, has experience with MDMA, LSD, and mushrooms... i brought her into this with absolutely no reservations...
at 9 o'clock we ate half a gram of mushrooms each, at my buddy Brad's with him & his gf Tina (again, not real names)... i'd usually go for a heroic dose myself, but this was about JoAnn, & i wanted to take it easy... i told her they opened the door a little, eased the anxiety a bit, and of course intensified the trip a bit... and i told her the truth, at least as it pertains to myself & my circle... we enjoy this combo on the regular, with no ill results or freak-outs so far... we chilled for an hour and a half, smoking some bowls... blueberry diesel, with some gold-flake hash (72.31%, dispensary hash, very legit, very very nice)... smoked about a gram of the herb & maybe an eight of a gram of the hash... rested on that for a while, & i broke out the changa
my spice is good and clean, rest assured... my changa is nice... here's the recipe:
1 pt 6x Caapi
1 pt Sinicuichi
2 pts Damiana
2 pts Calea Zacatechichi
.5 pt Mullein
1 pt Blue Lotusdone 1:1 with the spice, and a little extra spice thrown in for good measure... compensates for any precip in the evap dish, maintains the true 1:1 ratio i like this blend a lot... there have been a couple incidents of near-vomiting when smoking, but in both cases more alcohol than i recommend had been consumed... i now keep a bit of the same blend, minus the caapi, for such situations...
it was a bit after 11 before i had things all set... rolled 2 joints, half a gram of pot, half a gram of changa in each... yes, excessive, but the plan is to take a few tokes & put the toys away for later... it works well, and yr later sessions require no effort other than lighting half a joint... i gave Brad & Tina one & kept the other for JoAnn & myself...
i told JoAnn before hand that the body buzz would hit first, and that it might feel a bit overwhelming... told her that if she was comfortable to go ahead & take another toke, maybe two, then be done... told her if she was a little freaked by it, as happens sometimes, to just ride it out, let it pass, & it would not be as intimidating next time... kind of a trial run... i've found sometimes first-timers need to see first-hand that the body buzz is survivable before they want to go further... she hit it twice, & decided to ride with that for a minute... no problem... i hit a few tokes, went into my own thing for a minute... checked in on the room a couple times from hyperspace... everything was a-okay... she was eyes closed, smiling... quite beautiful... i smiled & closed mine back...
i had a playlist programmed... i do this with an agenda... i know the lengths of the songs involved, so in the middle of a session i can quickly get a grip on how much time has passed if need be... after the first song 17 minutes had passed... i squeezed her hand gently, she smiled harder & opened her eyes... just fine... i fired the joint again, she held my hand as i smoked it... i'd never had the sensation of human physical contact while in hyperspace, and found it just magical... in a word, perfect... Golden Road was up next, 18 minutes... i went out again, she sat beside me... she was enjoying herself, and i felt no need to press her to smoke more... that's a personal decision... she knew the toys were there for her if she chose them, but she was content... i liked that... halfway through Golden Road i packed a bit of Changa in my pipe, Chuck Norris... JoAnn peeped up, i gave her the pipe... i told her to take one, maybe two good hits, whenever she was ready... after a few minutes she took a decent toke & leaned back... i watched her this time, and she was the essence of peaceful beauty... after a few minutes i took the pipe from her hands & finished it... 9 minutes of Golden Road, then 10 minutes of Mercury Blues... & the music went silent... i got up & got a glass of orange juice, handed JoAnn her water... smoked a cigarette... put on a fresh tune, It's Up To You... 23 minutes long... at this point we were all thinking hot tub, the changa was put up for the time being... we lazed about for a bit... Brad got up to check the tub, Tina went to change... It's Up To You went off, & i got back up to program more tunes for hot-tub time... it had been just about 40 minutes at that point since JoAnn had hit the pipe...
while i was facing the stereo, back to JoAnn, i heard her glass of water hit the tile floor... i turned around to see what had happened & she was melted into the corner of the couch, and not in an entirely pleasant looking way...
i've seen plenty of people in hyperspace... this is not what this looked like... not at all... i am a recovering heroin addict, clean since Valentine's Day 2004... i've had several friends die in my presence... one of them is alive today because i kept my shit together... two were well past call an ambulance before anyone noticed them... JoAnn looked like one of them, with the exception of the sweat that was all of a sudden profuse... i spoke to her, no response... went over to her, touched her... for 10 seconds, what i witnesses was somewhere in the neighborhood of seizure/convulsion... & then, dead still again... at this point, reflex clicked in for just a moment, & i checked for a pulse... didn't find one...
"Brad, fuckin' help me bro."
"what's up man?"
"man, double check for me, but i don't think JoAnn's got a pulse."
he came in, checked... looked at me real grave... "man, i don't..."
i'ts been thirty seconds or so since the seizure, & it's time for that again... another quick convulsion, and she sits bolt upright, eyes wide open, gurgling something that is about 2 syllables from being what i'd call speaking in tongues. and the sweating gets much, much worse...
Brad & Tina came through like champs, told me we had to get her some air, so me & Brad got her to a chair outside... when we got her sat down she came to & i talked to her, let her know we were there, that everything was all right... we watched her for a while, she was obviously back to earth, & so we fired up the grill & cooked some steaks...
later, there was another changa session, but JoAnn did not participate... she also did not demand to be taken far the fuck away from us devil spawn, which impresses me to no great end... i can't say i'd have the same composure... in fact, at one point during the late night session, she even got me a blanket & tucked me in... i think i like this woman a lot, and would like to know what happened there, at least a general idea...
i'm sure the pulse thing was just a freak-out on my part... i had taken mushrooms, and smoked a bunch more changa than JoAnn had... i could have very easily missed it, and as for Brad, i asked him to confirm that she didn't have a pulse... that's a powerful seed to plant in a mind... he & Tina had eaten the shrooms too, so the whole circle was spun... i'm pretty sure she was alive the whole time...
but that still leaves the question of what the hell happened there?.. she had taken 2 tokes, then another about 20 minutes later... had a grand time, we were all back to life, conversing, plotting the rest of the evening, & damn near an hour after her last toke *BAM!!!* she's out... & scary, herky-jerky speaking in tongues out...
i know that Caapi can enhance the cannabis experience as well as DMT... is this what happened here?.. did the hash & the Caapi get together to have a delayed-reaction disco party in JoAnn's behalf?.. it's only 6x Caapi, and not the predominant herb in the blend, so it seems strange that the dmt would be raging almost an hour after being smoked, especially being as she didn't just smoke a shitload...
i do know that i was irresponsible and reckless to begin with... no way i should have thrown maoi, and psilo, at her simultaneously with the DMT... that was probably a little heavy... but i watched her handle that, and have a good time... so really it wasn't that bad... i do have a pretty fair amount of experience with psychedelics, albeit mostly lsd & shrooms... i am pretty new to the molecule... but this is not a dose i would be afraid to put on somebody almost any time... most of my circle are troopers...
i do believe JoAnne is interested in further exploration with DMT... & i am very enamored with the thought of spending time with her, regardless of whether the molecule is involved... but i'd like to be able to explain what the hell happened, just on principle and also for preventative measures in the future... i know that for now, if she decides to smoke again, we'll smoke some of the Caapi-free enhanced leaf, or maybe even just some crystal on a reefer joint... i'm hesitant to even go there, until i have a better clue as to what had happened before... in fact, i'm pretty hesitant to smoke the MAOI blend with anybody new, until i have a little better understanding of it...
sorry about the novel here, but i've actually come to a point where i've hit a brick wall with this, and would really like some insight... the teachers have lessons for us, some easier than others, & some much, much more important than the rest...
spinning a set the stars through which the tattered tales of axis roll about the waxen wind of never set to motion in the unbecoming round about the reason hardly matters nor the wise through which the stars were set in spin...
"Chemistry is applied theology." Augustus Owsley Stanley III