I'd had only one night off from a highly worthwhile visit to 2-c-e land, but got back from work last night and, at 11PM, downed a 60gm shot of redvine (reduced to a half cup of ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLY VILE crappy tasting liquid!!!) lit up with 3mg of juremajuice. Now this was my first attempt to blast off with jurema ... my previous aya blastoff was a wonderful, TRULY FEEL GOOD trippy time with an admix of 80% chacruna 20% chaliponga, in a INFINITELY tastier cup of yellow celio. So with all the tempting info out there about MHRB, and a previous experiment under my belt in which 1.5mg of jurema had no effect at all, I figured this jurema/redvine brew ought to be the real deal.

Well, it was not to be. I would not call it a bad trip by any means, and it did put me SERIOUSLY into tripland, but the underlying nausea was just too distracting for the entire 5 hr trip (which was an hour more than I'd expected). Slight nauseous hangover this morning, too, until noon. It was not a happy, fun, marvel-at-the-universe vibe, either, but more of a very neutral, deal-with-your-stuff kind of trip...no colorful OEV's like chacruna, either. I would have to compare it to going to the gym and doing an especially gruelling workout, or visisting the dentist for a successful root canal. Just stay with it, ride it, it's OK....it you HAVE to do it!

On a high point, I took advantage of the somber vibe to "look within"...believe me, when I feel that way I know exactly what to look for in the dark recesses of my ego structures .... so during the 3 hour peak that seemed like it would never end, in order to get my mind off my abdomen, I got lost in reading The "Hundred Thousand Songs of Milarepa" which really did resonate in me and still now, 23 hours later, the poetry is still ringing true. Honestly, just that reading was powerful enough under the circumstances to balance out all the other difficult aspects of the journey.

But overall it was disappointing, and I don't know if it was becasue of the jurema or the red vine. Or maybe something else, like eating some pork a few days ago. But it was enough to make me forswear both those products in activated aya for a while. Think I'll stick with yellow celio and chacruna.

I know what you mean. I had those kind of trips as well. Sometimes it just is like that. I've had those kinds of trips with chacruna as well, but jurema certainly is nastier on the stomach.

It can be all kinds of things, like the mood you was in when you ingested the stuff or something you ate...

Paradoxically, 'uncomfortable' feelings often disapear when you up the dose.
It's like..you need to be way above the clouds to see the sun. If you're just in the middle of them it's just grey everywhere.

Maybe the 2-ce temporarily upped your tolerance for hallucinogenic's.. Phenethylamine-like compounds tend to do that with tryptamines.

sometimes aya will just give you what you need..seriousily..its not always fun either..give it a few days and see how it plays out..sometimes you dont realize for a day or 2 what has changed.

Thanks for those reminders, poly and fractal! Those are good points to remember.... so far, jurema has been like that 'hard' teacher in school .. the one you might not fully appreciate until later, when you realize how much you learned.

does anyone else feel this is true from their experiences? interesting, i haveent heard this observation before. i have never really had a fun ayahuasca journey. parts of it are very enjoyable but always after an uncomfortable, difficult time.

At least your Jurema was prepared effectively.

Maybe that should be a tattoo for me?

Read the ++++ thread...posted today. Once you're beyond a certain point, it just forces you to leave everything behind. That's where the experience becomes filled with pure light.

Edit:++++ thread posted by gratefullfloyd in the DMT-experiences section.

I get it now....(still new to this aya thing!)

Began psychonauting a LONG time ago...just for fun, I thought, but subconsciously, there were more spiritual-type reasons for doing it that would take years to manifest.

Then, I began many years of chemical-free mediation (tho there were PLENTY of endogenous chemicals being produced!)...but I definitely "hit a block" at some point in that phase of my life, where I had trouble getting to the next level.

Then recently began psychonauting again..

Now I see that I returned to psychonating because I looked to it to help me go beyond the block in my meditation.

Aya is a way for me to get beyond those blockages....as many before me here can attest. I can see that my recent "difficult" jurema experience, definitely not a hyperspace event, was my first serious glimpse at letting go in order to get past the blockages.

And yes, MMM, as you surmised, it was EXPERTLY prepared jurema...the best kind. A blessing to partake of it. As they say, "You have to do it!"

I have honored the event with "commerative tatoo" based on an ancient diagram recently seen on these very pages!

yes and no..I feel like saying that you simply up the dose and all uncomfortable feeling disappear is a bit misleading..For me there is a sort of inbetween zone I can get into, where it feels like I am sort of soaring on the verge of a deep psychedelic state and much mellower sort of background caapi glow..this inbetween state makes me feel strange alot of the time..and usually mildy sick with a glow..but I feel like I am teetering back and forth on this fence never falling over onto any one side..

This is when I smoke..not alot..just like 7-10mg maybe in some changa..that small dose will be enough to push me right over that fence into a very deep ayahuasca state..thats not to say that it is any easier, it is usually a rough ride..but it gets me there and I then forget about being uncomfortable and instead to to remember to breath.. and I always feel sooo amazing after.

Last night I drank about 60g of ceilo vine with 1.5-2 grams of mimosa..I drank it all fast so it came on fast and hard at first..I felt uneasy and inbetween and uncomfortable..so I smoked the tiniest hit..and it really pushed me into that deep end..the next 30 minutes I was deep into a heavy ayahuasca peak..it really did make me less uncomfortable in a way, but at the same time..it was very difficult..all I could do was breath and try to stay centered..It was very visual and extremely beautiful mentally..things happened that I have no way of describing..but it was definatily edgy..but it totally pushed me into the space I wanted to get to anyway, and after abotu 25-30 minutes it dropped down a level and the rest of the experience was wonderful and amazing and left me feeling really really great.

It's the same if I simply drink more, except more drawn out..I find that 50-60g of ceilo is my sweet spot so I tend to not drink more than that often..more mimosa in the brew also pushes me out of the weird laying there sick sort of state into something I can transform a bit more and work with..but I prefer about 1.5g in my brew and then a small hit smoked at the peak..becasue reguardless of how deep it gets..I dont stay in the really heavy peak for more than 20-30 minutes that way..then the next 2 hours or so is really blissful as the brew slowly fades..

I am finding that the more caapi I drink the more I require the tryptamines to sort enhance the glow..caapi starts to do some serious work on me when I get over 50g..but it can feel sort of dark and weird, yet good, but the DMT helps to lift me a bit and work with the caapi recalibrations..

BTW..did you tatoo your hand yourself?..just wondering since I did the same thing when I was 19 with a friend and his homemade tattoo device lol..it turned out alright though and I like it..

Pau... I WANT ONE!!!