SWIM wanted me to relate this story to you all. I am posting it in this forum because my interest in her story explains why I am here and what I hope to get out of the DMT-Nexus. I'm looking for the others. I also don't want to post anything more personal (what I do, my story, etc.) for my introductory essay. SWIM had been visiting these forums for many months but hadn’t been able to sit down and write her story out. It really begins several years ago, when she took acid for the second time. It wasn’t that much, but some kind of intelligence used the moment to pull her into hyperspace. She’s gone there a few times with acid, always to the same places and into the same continuing narrative, but it has no correlation to the amount consumed. It’s almost like the acid just opens her to transmissions, and sometimes she intercepts them. There was a distinct intelligence there, and it was communicating with her, without words. It explained the fractal nature of the universe, and how things like acid where helping consciousness transition into something new; and that many of the people who had taken acid or mushrooms or DMT knew this on some level but couldn’t always talk about it. Everything was so beautiful, everything made sense, everything was redeemed, death was nonexistent, but she was in serious trouble in consensus reality—as in college security trouble. She could see herself screaming, from above herself, and pleaded with the intelligence: this is all well and good, but she had to go back there, she’s ruining her life back there! And all of a sudden the intelligence took her up to another realm, where she saw how her usual experience of reality was one infinitely small dimension of a huge fractal organism, and it was so beautiful. It was pretty much exactly like the “trip” scene from Contact, if you've seen that movie, which she saw for the first time a few years later. (If you haven't seen it, you should.)
When SWIM woke up sedated in the hospital (after having been tackled and strapped to a stretcher, and knowing she would likely be kicked out of school), she questioned everything and worried she was insane. It took about a year before she could start looking at the experience again, and take acid again. After she started taking acid again, she would every now and then slip back into that consciousness of reality and she could see her role in the world as it was unfolding. And over time those experiences and her normal lived experiences started to come closer and closer together. She began to stop thinking she was crazy.
Then, four years later, she smoked DMT. And everything came back, everything and more, and everything made sense and she could see it all so clearly. It began with a song, something she remember hearing before, but couldn’t remember from where. She saw into a world that she remembered having been born into. They told her that her maturation process—hers and the maturation of many others around her—was prophesied, but she didn’t really understand what that meant. It was like there was a god inside of her being born and some kind of new age was beginning. There were aliens making adjustments to her, fine-tuning, they said that they’d been waiting. They told her that there’s something that she knows how to do that is very special, and that she needed to find the others so they could all work together.
She traveled through so many dimensions & levels of consciousness that she says it’s really quite difficult to write about. They were teaching her, and she was learning to understand it. She tapped back into a narrative that began a long time ago, and suddenly she could remember and understand her past experiences. She remembered things that never happened in this lifetime. Her body there was expansive. She could still feel her normal consciousness, but she was aware of so much more, there was so much more to her than what she usually experienced. There were these great gelatinous blobby creatures & she knew how to feed them, she was tapped into this universal energy matrix and she knew how to convert it into nourishment. It was like she was nursing them. There was a spaceship, and it had to kind of unfold & unpackage itself. They needed her help with something. There were people there, and they were helping her do it. “She needs someone to tell her when,” one said to another, and they told her when to swallow and when to turn her head. She entered another dimension with more gelatinous creatures & they told her to breathe & keep her eyes closed & swallow. She could feel liquid all around her. It was like their dimension had to go through these transformations in order to make room for ours to grow. Things were happening that needed to be done for the transition. The humans told her that she was a perfect vessel of some kind, and they hooked her up to this infinitely wise creature, something like a seahorse. It had to adjust to her, like it had just woken up. She could feel its consciousness next to her consciousness & it was different from hers.
She went through more than a vial of DMT that night, so many doses. She was part of some kind of ritual. Every hour at 45-past she would smoke again & return to the same worlds, the same faces, the same story, as it was unfolding. She’d previously seen people building some giant structure in a dimension next to ours, and she saw that they were fitting it up to our dimension.
At one point there was a woman strapped into some kind of organic machine, and she was chatting with her really casually, telling SWIM about her family and her day as she was working. SWIM was learning to speak psychically & she told her this whole adjustment thing was kind of hard. The woman told her that she understood, that it’s a strange thing, becoming part of an organism. The other people explained to her that they were working on pulling her through, that that’s what they do, they do this often. Almost as if they were the people in Zion pulling her out of the Matrix for the first time. They said they’d come find her here, on this side, and that in time she would find the others.
There were witches & shamans, midwives, at the borderline, between the two hits and before she went through. She noticed them as she held her first hit each time--spirits in the room. They told her how to transition: a prayer; breathe in, hold as long as possible, swallow, inhale, breathe out; another prayer, and then “whatever gifts the flame will give you,” hold as long as possible, swallow, inhale, breathe out; blow out the candle; lie down; arms crossed over her chest; eyes closed. She would be completely in her room until she followed their instructions, closed her eyes, and then she was immediately through.
The shamans appeared on the other side towards the end of the day. It was like she was watching some Native American ritual. They were blessing her, saying prayers over her, initiating her into some kind of shamanic order. There was one woman that showed her a bird. She told SWIM that she was sending it after her, to watch over her on her journeys. And she said that she was sending very small things through, small creatures, to help her. SWIM had to go back one more time, with the rest of it, and that was her tenth breakthrough, probably the eighth of that day.
So that was that night. But otherwise she keeps going back to the same places, seeing the same people. As time went on she began encountering humans more and more frequently. At one point, after finishing some kind of transformation, she was at this ceremony and this intergalactic general of sorts was congratulating her on joining some kind of order. People wanted her to do things for them everywhere she went. She started getting really confused and didn’t want to deal with them. She demanded that someone explain to her in English, very clearly, what was going on. But after she went through again, so many people were rushing towards her that it got overwhelming. It was almost like she was a celebrity. One woman was sprinting after her but SWIM shook her head and went back to her room. There were these creatures in the borderline that sealed the other dimension off from hers. She was frustrated and asked them why no one was explaining what was going on. They looked back where they had sealed the door and indicated that the woman was supposed to talk to her. She felt horrible, but she couldn’t go back there. The creatures looked very upset and didn’t know what to do. And then SWIM ran out of DMT.
There are a few other recurring dimensions that SWIM thought I should mention. One is a jeweled dimension with jeweled creatures, and they’ve been explaining to her that she and one of her friends here are counterparts, that they have very special gifts and that they’re specifically meant to work together. She’s gotten all sorts of visions and information from them. Another is a very bright, mostly white dimension with shifting blocks with colored symbols on them. She sees them sometimes when she hasn’t smoked enough, so she can see into that dimension and see people laughing and running around there but she knows she’s still in her room and can’t go there. Sometimes in those not-enough instances they laugh at her, playfully, and close the door, the blocks folding to shut her out. When she first went to these places she knew very distinctly that she’d been there before.
SWIM says that it has all been so paradigm-shatteringly real that she can’t discount these experiences without discounting all of her experiences. She’s leaving possibilities open and trying not to jump to conclusions. And she hopes to find the others.
"The real secret of magic is that the world is made of words, and that if you know the words that the world is made of, you can make of it whatever you wish." - Terence McKenna