I just died.
That's all i can remember from my trip. I died.
Looking down all I could see were my mangled limbs. My shattered fingers.

I just died.

Now that I am thinking about it I had no hallucinations of the type I have read.

There were no magic rooms, no elves, no faces. nothing of the sort. Just my body.


Why?

Each journey has a completely different impact on us. My theory, based on talking to SWIM and reading the reports here on the Nexus, as ego-consciousness gets overwhelmed by its realization of the interpenetration of hyperspace, the interpretations of this get projected into awareness. For some it's rape by alligator men, others get mantoid brain surgery, SWIM got incestual violations. Many travels in hyperspace focus on the non-duality of reality, and reveal that each moment of life reflects an equal and opposite expression of death.

Take time to integrate. Also, do a test evap with your solvent to make sure it goes cleanly and wash your goo.

Very deep words.

I did got a clean evap, I smoked the goo just not the redish area but will be cleaning it.


In the trip all I thought was "FUCK DMT FUCK THIS IM THROWING IT ALL AWAY" but now, it ws in a terrifying way, beautiful.

Why would you think about throwing away your DMT during the trip? If you realized you had died, you would also have realized there would be no returning to your physical body ever again, and hence no concerns about DMT or anything else in your prior existence.

were YOU there? DMT shows us so many varied, unexplainable realities...I wouldn't be surprised if someone had a trip where they died and got reborn all at once..

not really fair to question ones reality like that...

No, I wasn’t there. I just wanted clarification from the OP concerning what he meant by the statement “I died.” Ego death? Bodily damage (mangled limbs, shattered fingers)? An out-of-body experience? A near-death experience?

I’m curious, because I once had an experience where I realized I had died (so in that sense, yes - I've been there). I was quite certain that my life had ended. There was no body to go back to. I felt a profound sense of loss – I was totally unprepared for what happened. I felt bad (shame?) that a pipe used for “drugs” would be found beside my body. I missed my family and my life. I’ve already made posts about this experience, so I won’t go into more detail here.

I had tried it 7 or 8 times with yellow product. i finally had some pure white. i wanted to break through and go far. i had no scale.... i proceeded to load a nice looking dose, set the mood and burned it all away... it came on slowly at first and then took off like a rocket. it came on too much too fast. i tried to open my eyes to fight it but there was no going back. i felt pure horror. painful energy coursing through my body.. i felt my soul burning. i kept forgetting what was happening, remembering and thinking oh its stopping but no it just swung me right back around. i cycled through horror, pain, and delerium for who knows how long. finally the intensty settled and i found that warm and beautiful place. a smile on my face i felt the pleasure of that realm until it was once again out of my reach. . . until next time. . .

"Blasting off" into hyperspace on the DMT rocket ship can be overwhelming, just like it would be to instantly hit 7 G's of acceleration from a standstill...but when you come to a sudden stop and are floating out there in the universe, the trip was all worth it.

Happy dreams,
-sleeper

yeah man i know what your talking about its a tough thing to handle. i know the feeling of wanting to throw the stuff out. i've had that a couple times like get rid of it all why are you messing with this shit? i ask myself . But i never actually do it.

I'm still trying to figure out way to handle the intensity of splintering apart. I'm terrified lately and can't go back yet.

I know what you are talking about the first time I brokethrough I remember that I died... It had no feelings of negativity at all though it was a feeling of ok what is next.. I died now what is happening.

Yeh, I had that a few months ago after a pretty strong dose. I SERIOUSLY thought I WAS dead. There was nothing but black nothingness...I remember the feeling of "oh fuck, now I've done it, lights out, game over." I was very surprised to start to feel my body and to start coming back. I too thought "screw this...never again" but in a little time I came back. It was a very scary experience. but since then I've had some really great experiences too.

these are all good points,i wanted to add my 2 cents,last nite swim did some dmt and it wasnt all that pleasant before swim opened there eyes to stop what was happening they were over whelmed with the feeling that they were about to die.once i figure out this blasted internets i plan on attempting to type out what happened and maybe get more input on a similur moment...wow fail at spelling today......

ya if it scares the hell out of me i make sure i do it again an hour or 2 afterwards cuz you cant leave it on a bad note