clearly brought back - much respect.

Hmmm.... I am qutie sure this was "Death at 450mg" when I read it before. How odd.

Pokey

I too recall that.

me 3

get some scales, buddy.

Why is this a spoiler? Ya, I get that you like to paint yourself as eccentric dood and whatnot, but for ease of reading and thread continuity, do you think you could maybe refrain from using spoilers except where you actually have "spoilers" within?

Also, good rationale for changing the amount from 450 to 250 isn't well reflected by your quote. If he didn't have an accurate scale, weight should have never been presented (and, from all indications was only presented so that a certain individual could say "look at how much I took, aren't I cool?!" ). If he edited this it should have been edited to reflect no weight as his 250mg estimate is no more accurate than 450mg and merely lessening his reported dose doesn't do anything beneficial for anyone. If anything, these speculated weights reflect just how much this was being done for grandstanding rather than personal betterment.

fnog9, I've already given you my opinion on your attitude relating to the spice and in particular this large dose. I'm glad you didn't do any damage to yourself and I hope you learned some lessons from this. This thread and the initial "i want to take a monumental dosage" thread are very disturbing to me and reflect changes the nexus seems to be undergoing. I humbly ask that you truly take some time to reflect on these events and your attitude in relation to them, do you really think this is the most productive and self-beneficial way to approach these substances? We all have our own perspectives and life paths to walk and if this is the path you feel you must take, I respect that. However, I would ask you to meditate on that and make sure this is indeed the path you are supposed to be walking and if it is not, please do whatever you must to get where you need to be.

What? Is all the spoiler talk directed at me? If I'm using spoilers I'm not aware of it. When I read my posts, it doesn't say anything about spoilers.

I'm continuing to realize how much people seem to hate stating amounts taken. I won't do that again... and so I've just been trying to resolve that issue. That's all. My dosage had nothing to do with the any trend from this site, and I didn't mean to promote taking high doses. Sorry, when I talk about dmt, I will emphasize the nexus concensus on what safety and responsibility are.

No, it's not directed at you, it was directed at Ya. The problem have been resolved.

Is it just me, or does the original post keep changing? I know I'm getting old, but I swear the first post is totally different.... again...

Pokey the Demented

It does keep changing, from 450 mg to 250 mg to now "a somewhat large dose". The title have also been changed. I guess fnog9 didn't like the negative feedback he got on his dosage, which I can understand very well, but I also understand very well why people react. Half a gram of DMT is not a good idea, especially not as only one's second journey. But of course he is free to do it if he wants.

Now, back to topic.

fnog9, that is an amazing report and experience. Not having yet partaken in the spice, reading these accounts gives me a lot of food for thought. On a heroic dose of mushrooms several years back, I experienced similar revelations, but not to the extent of dissociating and thinking I had died...that seems to be a pretty common theme on breakthrough doses of DMT, and to be honest, scares me a little bit. I'm all for heroic journeys, believe me, but it's the kind of thing I have to build up to - even during my more active tripping years, I always started off the season with normal doses, then built up to a heroic dose and was then done for the year (or more). I certainly gained from the experiences, but they were never the kind of thing I wanted to do all the time. Though I can see regular doses on a regular basis, the fantastic journeys of high dosages were just a once in a while thing, not as a matter of principle, just of preference. Though I have to say, the experiences of synesthesia I would get at high doses of shrooms, such as sailing on a beam of crystalline guitar notes into the depths of the universe, have to be among life's greatest treasures

I really enjoyed your story. I hope the insights you gained stay with you, especially the value you place on your family. I was touched.

Peace,

RealAwareness

Thanks, yes it was a good story wasn't it? And yes the insights are staying, they seem to become more solid each day actually, as I get used to the ideas. If you are thinking of taking a high dose, expect to lose everything. Expect to vbe humbled and terrified beyond belief. Nothing can really prepare you. Mental preparation might help, but it is your mind that you're going to lose, so what good is mental preparation going to do? Every tool you can use to prepare yourself will be lost. I reached a point where I lost absolutely everything, mind, sense of self, sense of hope, sense of reality, sense of strength, sense of dignity, and physically it was beyond what I could handle. If for whatever reason, if that sounds like something you want... to have everything you know crumble and be reduced to a snivelling begging broken worm at the door of death, and face the real possibiliy that you may die and not come back.... if all that resonates for whatever reason, then perhaps continue considering your high dose. Just a reminder that high doses don't feel good..

yup. me2