So…. Where do i start. After i moved this weekend i decided to drink up on some rue tea with the intent of smoalking some this sunday. At 7pm i drank 3g of rue. I boiled it for 45 minutes and reduced it to a small glass amount.
About an hour in i was sitting on my bed with my e-juice vaporizer. This thay the preflight anxiety was really strong. It also was the first time for me doing it under the influence of an MAOI. I had experience with just MAOI’s before and liked the effects.
My ego was really biting, but at one point i got over myself and started hitting my vape. At first the TC setting was too low so it only produce small amounts of vapor. The anxiety was slowly fading off. I adjusted it on 220C and took some small puffs. While writing this up im totally back in the moment from yesterday.
My room was very dimly lit as i had the shutters almost closed. I was looking at my brown wooden ceiling lying on my new comfy mattress. Currently i was listening to Shpongle. I chose one album at random and let spotify do the work.
When i first noticed the effects of the DMT working on me i didn’t get the usual mandala like overlay over myself and the buzzing wasn’t quite as strong. The edges from each bar of my ceiling started to overlap in a symmetrical pattern and i heard the calling from hyperspace. I took a deeper puff and layed down.
This is where it gets a bit difficult to have a timeline as i took around 10 big hits over the course of 90 minutes. I fell into this impossible space and immediately got greated by beings. They were very interested and i was very awestruck. Somehow everytime my mouth opens they are really interested to touch it and shove things inside it. Its very weird having this odd tactile feeling „over“ my mouth, almost like a sharp edge running over me.
I asked some questions. Asking who i am and what they are resulted in chuckling. They told me nothing makes any sense. All this time i had the feeling of being worked on and taken on a ride. I had this one thing to my left inspecting me thoroughly. It called me very special.
As i had an MAOI in my system every stage of this experience didn’t feel rushed and way more contextual than my other vaped experiences. I had time to look around show myself – myself.
At some point i really had the feeling of being worked out, like an entity pushing my buttons. I was flailing my arms around and enjoying my emotions.
I came to great insights. I felt like this was deeply needed and „finally i made it“, i felt it had something to do with living on my own. What also struck me deep was when i said to myself „sorry mom and dad that im not what you expected me to be.“. I was really checking myself out and got comfortable within myself. The experience showed me lots of weird behavioral issues im bringing upon myself. It felt like i had this equalizing pattern to think about myself, see whats wrong and right, where i spent high amounts of energy to work against myself.
During the experience i had the idea to get up, which i did. I was still very much buzzing from the dmt but it was a comfortable state. I began dancing and felt like my body and mind was moving on its own which felt really nice. I was comfortable letting go and just spectating all of this. I felt secure and really enjoyed myself – which infact the entities did enjoy aswell as they told me when i layed back down
After alot of dancing and investigating this interesting set of mind i layed back down and wanted to take one more hit. I got the notice before that its not really a good idea to do but i wanted to do it anyway. I quickly realized i was a bit exhausted and it wasnt a great point to take one more hit. The entities i met were quickly ignoring me, one told me „you had your workout already“. I noticed i was taking it a bit too far and kind of reverted a bit of progress.
It showed me these subtances demand respect. I integrated it quickly though and in the end it didnt affect the positive effects of the trip at all.
Soooooo….. what a crazy ride this was. Im sure im leaving alot of details out. I remember i had entities making faces to cheer me up, how i told an entity „i want a child from you“ (bit lost in translation here) which got answered by „Grow up!“ LOL. Entities inspecting me asking themselves „is he one of us?“, and later got the answer „he is one of us!“. Probably way more but this experience was cramped into 90 minutes. Hours worth of therapy crammed in one smoalking sess. WOW!
It made me really confident of accepting this shamanic way of life im so eagerly feel the calling for and i believe i matured alot in this experience. Now im really hooked what a deep breakthrough would feel like for me. I do believe i never had more than 15mg in my system and im already in these very visionary states, fully involved and communicating but always barely still with my body im so deeply grounded with for this lifetime. When im confident this is well integrated i can see great experiences with DMT in the future for myself.
This has been one of the most profound and personal experiences with myself. I really hope you enjoyed this report.