PRE-CONDITIONS(mind)Set: More or less neutral, some trepidation
(physical condition) Set: healthy
Setting (location): bedroom
time of day: evening, sun had just gone down
recent drug use: none
last meal: pasta, 20 minutes before
PARTICIPANTGender: m
body weight: 63kg
known sensitivities: none
history of use: experienced with psychs, tried sub-threshhold doses of changa, never vaped DMT
BIOASSAYSubstance(s): DMT
Dose(s): 30-50mg (i must acquire a better scale)
Method of administration:
Vaporized via. e-mesh
EFFECTSAdministration time: T=0:00
Duration: 10 minutes
First effects: 5 seconds
Peak: 00:00:10 - 00:04:00
Come down: 00:04-00:10
Baseline: 00:10
Intensity (overall): 4
OPTIONALPleasantness: (0-4)
Implesantness: (0-4)
Visual Intensity: (0-4)
. 2
. 2
. 4
AFTER-EFFECTSHangover: none
Afterglow: none
REPORTThe vape mod had arrived in the mail yesterday, and I spent some time getting it set up and charging the battery. My friend arrived around 6:30, and we were going to test it out together. We spent some time in my room trying to get it to work to no avail (it was on wattage mode as I thought that I hadn't got the settings right for TC mode), wasting a good bit of DMT in the process. He had somewhere to be, so he left, and I had dinner. I returned to my room and decided to have another shot. I lay down on my floor to do some breathwork for around 10m to relax and prepare myself, before I got into my chair and loaded up the DMT onto the mesh. I tried switching it to TC mode, and after some hesitation, fired up the vape and began to inhale. Within a second I began to breathe in thick, warm vapor - which was not particularly harsh - until I couldn't feel anything else vaporizing. Then I held my breath.
Within 5 seconds, there was this unbelievable rush, an increasing pressure on my head, and then... ZANG! Everything was gone; I will never be able to properly describe this moment, it was as if all reality was just instantly popped. Nothing at all was recognizable or intelligible. I remember feeling being so deeply shocked, just completely dumbfounded, although at this moment I managed to lower myself off my chair, and I lay down on my side on the floor. My body began to be wracked by convulsions, like I was being zapped every 1-2 seconds. The experience was so unthinkably intense and so completely alien that I began to wonder if I had died, or was dying; I have dreams occasionally in which I die (in fact I had one the night before), and the feeling was not dissimilar: a profound peace, a sensation of the mind winding down and closing up, a deep blankness. Somewhere deep at the back of my mind I was thinking: "I've really done it this time, I went to far, I've either gone insane or died" and so on. There was a strange sense of terror, too, although it came more from a place of shock than one of fear. After maybe 20-30 seconds of this, there was a sudden stab of vibrant neon, a rapid breathing into this blank field, and with it came a hint of comprehension. It is really difficult to explain, this moment was so intensely profound, something that touched upon the very fundamental nature of reality. It was some sort of spark of reconstitution, things coming together again... words fail me here. From here on out, I only recall snippets: I was in this space of divine light and an infinite lattice structure, later it felt as if I was lying on the floor in the inner courtyard of some hyperspacial villa. As I regained awareness, I began to sing to try and stabilize the experience, although from here I was out of the thick of it anyway; I knew now that I was fine, and was going to be fine, and I felt relieved. Normalcy was returning quickly, and I got up and lay on my folded legs with my face on the floor. With my eyes closed I was moving outward and back, and in front of me was a closed wall of intricately patterned 'arms' or tentacles that packed together tightly. They felt powerful and alive. At this point I was able to stand and made my way to the bathroom. By the time I finished taking a leak, I was dead sober. There as not even the slightest hint of what had happened only minutes earlier. I began to laugh; how could something like this even be possible? How could I go from from an experience which was, without contest, the most extreme I have ever had in my life, to being absolutely and completely baseline within a span of 10 minutes?
I have been thinking about this experience constantly since last night, I simply cannot get it off my mind. I tried talking about it with a friend, but I quickly realized there was nothing I could say so that they would understand not just the experience but what it meant to me. That, in part, is why I'm posting here; I feel like I have to get this off my chest somehow. Thanks