The essence of my DMT trips seems to be a blending of meaning. Opposites meet, converge, and out of the chaos comes a new type of experience. The events, emotions, and visions that unfold all take place "in between" logical description. Entities are simultaneously reassuring and discouraging, wholesome and perverse, comical and stone cold serious. As soon as I latch onto something, the carpet is pulled out from underneath me and the opposite becomes true. It feels like a trickery, the most important of messages is being delivered with the utmost care and intention but it is completely arbitrary. There is a futility about it. Any number of meanings and lessons can be pulled from it because it is the essence of non-meaning.
Sometimes, my internal narrative loses its integrity; it gives up trying to form a coherent dialogue about the experience and instead resorts to making sound effects for the visions I'm seeing. It feels like a raging wave of pure creativity, a huge cosmic middle finger aimed at logic and stability. The ultimate defiance against our nature.
Time for another long break