Let me start at the beginning. I didn't expect a breakthrough, I didn't add any more deemz on the oil burner, I just went over what was left in there. But I held the lighter for longer over each area than I usually do. Steam billowed out, which surprised me, and then I shot away, through blackness, to a man by a door, outlined in neon white. The man was black and tribal, he smiled at me and opened the door, motioning me to go through. And there I was, in this beautiful room filled with rows and rows of men who were statues, their eyes closed and perfectly still, although they were alive, maybe in suspended animation. The ceilings were super high and vaulted, the men all had golden skin with lilac, pale pink and minty green patterns all over them, underneath their skin which was like holograms, it was like seeing the shapes underneath depended on how I was looking at it, they were more real than real. Inside the shapes were more suspended animation men, the patterns inside the patterns moving around them. The men had wide noses and huge eyes, their lips were wide and the same thickness at the top and bottom, with beautiful sculpted cheekbones. I reached out and touched one, there was something invisible connecting them all together, and I wondered what, and its like I zoomed into the gap between them, and the colours changed, became super intense rainbows with this black symbol on them, curved lines and dots, then part of the black came apart and I could see these grass green squiggly ribbons of energy going from the first part of the separated black symbol to the part it had been moved away from. I didn't even think, I just reached up and touched this energy and WOW, it flowed through me, through my hand, up to my mind.. I felt the love and connectedness just flow through me, it was incredible! Then through my entire body, and then I was not only experiencing the energy, I was part of it, connected to the whole system. Then I opened my eyes. My hand was up, reaching out to where I had tapped into the system, and my hand and arm were glowing with the same golden light that the statue men were made of. I just looked at my hand for the next five minutes, and enjoyed feeling the sense of calmness and love and tranquility that filled the room.
It was an incredible experience and I feel so lucky to have finally had it
Edit--- When I moved too fast in the room the shapes turned to green nets on a black background, like reality needed to reconfigured itself and load til the images returned again. Quite solipsistic.