There are psychological factors in play which can block you from entering the hyperspace. This is quite unique compared to LSD and mushrooms.
I recommend experimenting more with harmalas. You can take heavy dose of harmalas (caapi or Atrian rue) so that you can definitely feel your mind space changing, but don't get the nausea if you skip DMT. If you skip the DMT part you don't build up the expectations for the trip which can build a block that prevents you from giving yourself in to the experience.
Sometimes to establish an intimate connection with someone you need to let go of any expectations regarding what you want to achieve in this encounter. I'd recommend taking the same approach. Learn to enjoy the subtlety of the altered mind with harmalas. Then when you are ready you need just a pinch of DMT to get on the train.
The hyperspace doesn't like to be forced. Who does.