I had a serious experience with some Aya over the weekend, the brew was made about a month previously and it was only now that I had the chance to try it.
I prepared myself with my usual calling of the directions and inviting the spirit guides & smudging with palo santo etc. This was my first solo mission and I didn't want to go overboard so i took what I considered to be 20% less than a super strong dose. the 600 ml of brew had 500g of thick vine and 150g acacia phyllodes (1% to 1.5% tryptamine content) and some cats claw, plus some alchemical processes which was relayed to me by the vine before consumption.
The 35ml cup to start was quite strong and got me in the groove however there were no visuals and the first hour was quite meditative. after 90 minutes I decided it was time to have another cup, this time 30 ml.
Within 3 minutes of the second cup chaos started raining down.
I was exhausted and lay back almost falling through the floor into what can only be described as a full half hour of alien contact. I was holding some form of psychic conversation with two alien entities which sounded to me like elastic spring noises underwater, it was very strange and a few times I communicated that things were getting too difficult, the aliens responded with "what ? more difficult than an anal probe? Keep talking or that's what you'll get" but in the underwater noises with psychic visualisation.
Just when I thought the experience had tapered off or at least plateaued, I felt the tryptyamine tingles all over my body signaling things were just about to be turned up a few notches.
So many times when I was confronted with abject confusion I said to myself "treat it with love" and the discomfort went away. I spent hours thinking I had fatally poisoned myself when the purge wouldn't let up. I berated myself for not drinking enough water during the day to combat the feeling of dehydration I had.
I passed out and came too, I think, it was like I had been born during the big bang with massive light and colour and confusion, I felt like I was dying but there really was no "I" to speak of.
It seemed that every neuron had fired off in a cascade of vile meaningless dark noise. I felt like I had reached insanity or had been involved in a serious car accident and suffered some terrible head injury and was only just coming too.
I was glad for the reprieve following the vomiting and started getting some meaningful visuals. I saw some cancerous growths being ripped from me and at one point saw myself as non human, taking the form of a beast battling a great snake. I eventually managed to crawl to my bed and struggled through the night to get some sleep.
The following week has had some challenges with feelings of depersonalisation and trauma at remembering the chaos and confusion.
I think there was far too much light in the brew, I estimate 100mg/35ml shot. I made the same brew last year and it was strong but not like this.
Anyway just some thursday night ramblings after a few beers, take it for what you will.
I am a leaf on the the wind, watch how I soar!