So I have been regularly DMT tripping ever since my Ayahuasca retreat experience in December last year.

By now i've probably done ayahuasca admixtures over 10 times (alone or in groups) and have vaped on the spice a good number of times.

I've been using MHRB and Syrian Rue for my aya admixtures. I have learnt a good deal and feel a greater sense of calm and understanding than i've ever known in my life, though I do find the MHRB and Syrian Rue seems to be absent of love in its experience. Almost emotionless in fact, for me. I have tried MHRB doses in the range of 3-6g and Syrian Rue in the range of 3-4g.

I am soon to buy some Chaliponga and Caapi. I'm excited to see how this experience is different.

A few weeks ago now my friend came over and we had a bit of a blast on the spice (vape pen). This time I wanted to push it a little further than I had done previously, so I took a real heavy drag.

I can't really explain what happened even now, it was just a whole "WTF??" experience. Previously when I had vaped the "entry" would begin with pixellation, colour and pattern shifts. This time everything almost immediately went black (eyes open) and I was no longer in the room. I'm not entirely sure I even had a body. I was just in this black and orange place and my friend and everything familiar had gone. Before I could even work out what was happening I started pulling back into my body and the room, with everything crawling and shifting as I had known previously.

Whilst the experience wasn't scary, it was so intense that I didn't need another hit and just chilled out.

Wind back 2 weeks ago, I then had a 5g MHRB smoothie. During the come up/peak, everything started shimmering, colour patterns, crawling and shifting etc. And I thought "oooh lovely, here we go!!". The experience kept getting more and more intense and it got to a point where, I can't explain why, but I had my first experience of discomfort. I don't know if it was fear, or panic, or an awareness of being "close" to having an experience of either. But it was quite challenging for a period of 5/10 minutes. The rest of the experience was lovely prior to and after this point. Not a bad experience by any stretch, but a mentally challenging one. I can't explain the peak as anything other than incredibly, incredibly intense. But I can't explain why it was intense. Hopefully that makes sense

Last night I had a 4g MHRB brew which had been in the fridge for a week. In the waiting period after drinking I had a brief moment where my brain went "No!! I don't want to do this! Stop!" and a small wave of fear went through my body. I went through the thought processes and immediately put it away and was fine. I did at times during the trip however feel slightly "edgy", as if, were I not mentally strong, then maybe fear could creep over me. I have never felt like this before on a dose of this amount.

Appreciation to any of you who read my experience and I welcome anyone to chip in with their thoughts.

<3

When you get to heavier dosages and higher levels you start to play with the ego and it doesnt like that at all.. That is what is creating the sensations you are talking about.. You need to learn how to trick it and kill it.. After is where the real beauty and teachings takes place. When you go from dualism to non dualism more or less..

If you smoke DMT and black out you did to much.. you need to work youself up to that level gradually before you can enjoy the "death rides" without body heartbeat and breath..

You spoke about Chali and Caapi.. My companions for a long time now.. I suggest you cook up 100g Caapi with 20g Chali.. Get it down to 10cl.. drink 5.. Then after 30min or when you start feeling the effect you drink the rest.. This is where real journeying begins.. Or if you want to be more gentle you can do 3cl, wait 30 min take 3cl more... feel it .. and if you want to go further take the rest..

Good luck

Yeah, i've had such experiences as well.

I think eaglepath is right about it having to do with ego-loss, but it still is hard to explain what exactly is going on. Sometimes it just can get a little rough.

When boundaries start to disappear, it feels a bit like standing at the edge of a cliff. The feeling you could get pulled in. There is the potential for a lot of very dark things in each of us.

I am not saying that we could all be serialkillers, because in most of us there is enough goodness to keep us from becoming like that. But the fact is that there is that potential. Our nervous systems are technically capable to make us perform the act of murder.

There is an infinite amount of statues present in each block of marble, and some of them are devils.

The fear can diminish in time though. If after a couple dozen ego-loss experiences, you've never woken up the next day with a decapitated body lying next to you or an awfull lot of blood everywhere and a butchers knife in your hands, you can more or less assume it is relatively safe for you to let go.

Respect born out've experience over time, especially at the higher dosages if you're able to stay with it.



Welcome to dmt

Thanks Eagle. I shall give this a try and report back