so i just found these old essays on my old hard drive. These were written back when i first started experimenting/expanding. havnt read through them just going to post 'em. (hope there is no personal info)

numero uno

A twisted thought process:

Psychedelic experiences can often expand our consciousness. The experience that often occurs is that of ego loss. A mind boggling phenomenon of which one's perception of space time, the all encompassing universe whether that be the couch or tree the phenomenon eventuates near or any metaphysical thoughts, is not based on the entity's past emotional connection to events but the factual evidence gathered from all events. Seeing as all experiences mold our self continuously into the current unique product that acts in response to all other events as such. We create our unique products based on our understanding of each and every event. If one was to take an unbiased look at all events, that is to analyze and comprehend the event, why it occurred, and all reactions too, then they would be an outstanding human being. It is hard to establish such thought processes because the mind which conjures those ideas is a product. The loss of such metaphysical chains would allow for a true look at an event. An example I am going to borrow from the book Ishmeal is that of cannibalism. It is often thought of as a malevolent and abysmal atrocity. However that very thought is based of off past experiences. If there existed a group of people that were categorized as A, B, C, the only difference being the title given. Now this community acts as such: People A eat people B, people B eat People C and People C eat people A. There is no negative influence of such deeds on the people, that is just how things are. They except that and all understand it as a way of life. Said events are in no way evil. It is very similar to lions and their herd pray; after the lions kill one of their prey the predators and the prey will both continue as if nothing is wrong. Evil would be to force their idea of such process onto others. They may be able to farm or herd, maybe not.
The beautiful thing is that we are conscious of our consciousness! This allows us to analyze ourselves. We are able to step back from the creation of the product and analyze it by means of itself and therefore shape the product based on our understanding of the product and event, such action is an event. The downfall being that the tool used to analyze the product and event is itself the current product. However if one is to experience ego loss then they can analyze the product from outside the twisted loop, or even analyze an event without the product. The tool used for such an analysis is unbiased and true. It is just so key to be aware of the fact that you are a product. It takes you one step closer to the event.


numero duos

An Essay on Free Will

In trying to assume nothing, in accordance to Miguel Ruiz philosophical ideas, we must prove that our genetics and all events that effect us, whether directly or indirectly, will change the way that we, a human being, respond to a current event. Now, without finding such evidence for the sake of time, we will assume that ones genes and past experiences and events change the way one will behave in a current situation. This assumption will only last as long as it takes me to find scientific data to reinforce my position. If genetics and past experiences effect a current situation then wouldn't the outcome of the current situation be predetermined by ones genetics and past experiences? It would, in fact any previous event whether it be a child crying or a terrorist attack would then effect all those that it directly effect, via any sensual stimulation, or by those that are then effected by the "primary effecties". These "secondary effecties" would be effected by the "primary effecties" via any sensual stimulation. Sensual stimulation being defined as any connection, eye contact, touch, emotional sensations so on and so forth. Therefore any and all events would therefore change the outcome of any future event, therefore eliminating free will. During an event, what ever it may be, if all things that have come before you have changed you then therefore you have no free will because in any situation or event those past experiences and genetics, genetics being a past event, for birth would be a past event so would any and all events that effect your parents, their parents, so on and so forth (all the way back to the beginning of time), then your reaction is predetermined by those past events, therefore eliminating "free will". "Free will" being the ability for any one person to change the outcome of any one situation at any one time. This would then mean that all things have been effected by, and from, the beginning of time. All events past the beginning of time would therefore be effected by the beginning of time and all events after every other event would be effected by those previous events. So one, one being a sentient, reasoning human being, would therefore have their reactions predetermined by those past experiences and events, ranging back to the beginning of time. Having any predetermined reaction to an event is eliminating "free will".


numero tres



An Essay on Humanity

Humanity is not just a grouping of proteins, as science would have us believe. Humanity is a mind set, that all humans have. It's a conscious and unconscious state of mind. Humanity cannot be defined through science. Being human is having a sense of moral and immoral actions, or rights and wrongs. These rights and wrongs are going to be defined by ones culture. However, I believe that there are a set of rights and wrongs that are universal. And that all cultures are given a slight leniency to interpret and utilize these universal rights and wrongs.
Cultures are in a constant state of flux. This flux is universal throughout all things, whether they be physical or metaphysical. The American culture has changed over the past 200 years, and so have the numerous sub-cultures. These sub-cultures now include: hippies, gangster, wiggers, preps, jocks, smokers, non smokers, clubbers, in fact the list of sub-cultures could go on and on because there is no clear definition of a sub culture. However, a sub-culture, for the sake of semantics, will be defined as a any group/groups that any individual would be able to associate and have a majority of ideas,attitudes, and physical similarities. This individual would also have to have the necessary social skills to relate and act accordingly with the sub-culture.
These sub-cultures, as with all cultures, are vague and are up for discussion. This is due to the universal flux that is a constant occurrence. In fact, one would go as far to say that the only constant in the universe is that everything is in constant flux. Culture cannot be defined because it is in a constant state of change and will always have exceptions. A definition cannot have any exceptions because if it were to have exceptions it would not be a definition. So as you may have noticed I have contradicted myself; in stating and defining a sub-culture, and then by saying that any definition of a culture is flawed. However, I may have contradicted myself yet I am correct on one account, and not wrong on the other account. I am correct in saying that defining a culture is next to impossibility because with e definition there can be no exceptions. I am not wrong in the sense that defining sub-culture because I am defining it for the sake of semantics, in other words I'm defining it for this moment, and at any one moment, a moment of time so small that there is no change a definition of something changing is correct. Now if I were to define something as changing then my definition would be innately flawed and that in any other time than now would be sufficient. Cultures, as a definition, are stereotypes. Stereotypes are often true, as they are based on a group of peoples past experiences and observations.

Happiness is not something you find and hold onto for eternity, it is a fleeting moment and lifes goal is to find and cherish as many of those moments as possible. True happiness cannot be found in ignorance. However, ignorance is bliss, but bliss is not true happiness. Ignorance is not true happiness because in a state of bliss one cannot know anything. To not know anything would be to not know that you exist, what happiness is, or that you want to obtain happiness. If one is ignorant of happiness they cannot find happiness. Happiness can only be found by those that are aware of its existence. This existence is not physical, but metaphysical. Happiness is an idea that all people should strive to achieve. This happiness is going to vary from person to person. No one can project their happiness to other, and no one will find happiness the same way. One might find true happiness in the torture and molestation of other, however, as a human being, and by possessing a conscious I must believe that one cannot find happiness via those means. I also believe that all people have the right to, and should, find happiness. With that belief I must also believe that one cannot find true happiness is the molestation of other because that would inhibit the others happiness which would go against the before mentioned personal belief.




numero quatro




People in general do what is best for them at any one time. This habit is a terrible habit for any species that wants to survive. A species with the mental capacity to understand their future and themselves can also understand that they must do all that is in their power to maintain their own species without harming there environment. However, there are few humans that fully understand this and address it on a daily basis. Even fewer understand that to further their own species survival they should do as much as possible to maintain their environment.
A population of humans will, few times out of many, come together and unite for their own good. This can be seen when any population has come under attack from an outside, or inside, force. This can be seen in any class struggle; the Americans, of the late 1700's, where oppressed by a government across a vast expanse of water. The people of the new colonies where treated as lesser people; they where taxed and taxed until their pockets where empty. Now this outside force caused the people of the new colonies to come together and fight for one common goal, equality and freedom from their oppressors. The Revolution after revolution has brought people together only to tear them apart again. Revolution after revolution has brought people together only to rip them apart in the end. The population of one county will join forces to through out an oppressor and then the government will then turn on its own people when there is no longer an outside force oppressing them. Many nations in Africa, after winning their freedom from European powers turned on their own kind.
Now if a revolution occurred and the government was not about furthering itself, but about furthering its people, what would happen? Would this government not create an army? Would all the citizens be for this self improvement? Would single minded people take control? Would outside forces take control of this self aware society? This society would really need to be self aware and able to step back and analyze most situations with the whole community in mind. Should one citizen be equal to the sum of the community or should the community greatly out weigh the individual? With an individual not as important as the whole community would circumstances come about that the individual would be alienated, therefore creating a divide in the community completely destroying the wholeness that self improvement would bring?


i wrote these around ten years ago. i still dig philosophy. not sure if i still believe any of these, will have to read through later.