Hi folks.
I have been having a weird problem trying to break through which I could use some help explaining.
When I smoke small amounts of DMT (20mg) I have a nice short trip with no real side effects.
If I up the amount 60mg to try and break through I feel like my whole being is being ripped apart. It is truly horrible. I feel like I can't look into the tunnel and let myself go because something is being rammed down my throat which just makes me wretch so hard I feel like I am going to die. If I look away (In my mind obviously) I can calm myself down, brace myself and try again, but the exact same thing happens over and over again. Each time I try and head into hyper space I feel so ill it takes over my whole being and I just want ti to stop. Has anybody had similar experiences, and if so is there anything I can do to stop this?
I tried smoking in all different ways and always the same thing is happening, even though I did manage to break through one time without any issues I think that was just a fluke.
Any comments greatly appreciated.

A few things come to mind after reading this.

Dial in your dosage. 60mg is a wild ride and headed for whiteout experience. It can simply overwhelm. Sensory overload.

Take a long break and integrate.

Any repetitive thoughts in waking life and in that DMT space is an indication of the ego grasping. It is very hard to let go sometimes. One cannot show someone how to let go. This is something you have to learn and experience on your own. We avoid pain and we avoid darkness at all costs in some instances. It blocks us from the beauty of life in everyday moments. We then begin to live in an illusion. That illusion is a beautiful thing in itself. It is a great teacher. We will awake to the illusion only once we let go of it. The world then suddenly becomes something real. Some refer to this as Satori.

Below is a picture of the Hakuin Ekaku monkey and the poem associated with the picture.

The monkey is reaching for the moon in the water
Until death overtakes him he'll never give up.
If he'd let go the branch and disappear in the deep pool,
The whole world would shine with dazzling pureness.

Hi WD
Thanks for taking the time to post a meaningful reply.
You are correct in your analysis, like the monkey I cannot let go. I feel like I will actually die if I do because I have a very controlling personality (Not of others I live alone, but of myself). This is the Ego death people speak of and I'm not yet ready to except it.
A break is required, maybe a month or more and then I'll try again. Small doses at first and building up instead of smashing my brains and lungs to pieces.
It will give me time to work on my mental state.
Thanks again.
Peace

I got nausea before and vomited, and I thought it was to do with fear etc, and it wasn't until I extracted a few times and cleaned up the product A. confuse, there is a fat or something that doesn't agree with me at all, now I don't get that. it also affected the measuring of my doses because of the purity,.

but you got to let go man, Fully, you cant lie,

good luck

I've felt like vomiting a couple of times on lower doses, and my very first time on DMT I actually did vomit.
I've smoked everywhere from 5mg up to 70mg on glass pipe, and 200mg through Vape (over longer periods)
I never got anything meaningful on glass pipe as it was not enough time to for me to relax, or get used to it.
All my breakthroughs are on Vape where you can keep yourself in a state for longer time and ease in to it at your own time.

In those cases of feeling sick, I just wait it out knowing I am completely fine.
You have to know you will not die, you will be totally fine in 10 minutes time...
Just wait it out and don't panic, remain calm, even though it doesn't feel very pleasant.

I think people get confused, like I did at first.. at what "Breakthrough" is.

I've done around 50 trips, many long extended 30 to 50 minute trips with the vape.
What I've learned is everything is mind / thought.

The early stage of DMT is usually for me and most people bright vivid colour, patterns, sometimes faces..
It is usually abstract, non specific, and sometimes playful and cartoon like.
This is just one aspect of mind, mind has infinite aspects. It's up to you how far you want to go down the rabbit hole.
If you are distracted or content with only seeing that, thinking that is all there is you will not be shown more.
As Terrence McKenna would say "Don't lose yourself to amazement"
If you sit up and reach your head and hand upwards to the sky, and seek a higher realm, you'll find yourself suddenly in a very different place. The colours vanish, and you become in white and grey light, it's like a spiritual divine place.
You will see yourself as manifestations of God / The One Mind. It will teach you that God takes all form.

That again is only one aspect of the mind, breaking through requires asking questions and seeking more.
A genuine curiosity to know yourself, and by knowing yourself, know the one mind / God.

I say all that as an atheist of 32 years, breaking through on DMT put me into places I have no doubt what it was.
I view God as a non-physical infinite, immortal, all creating mind, from which all form is created, but in itself is formless.
DMT will allow you to ask questions on who you are and be shown answers. It will allow you to explore that larger mind that is not normally within our perception. Just don't try too hard, do not be scared of it, fear won't get you anywhere.
You have to have love, wonder and an open heart for the experience of what the mind can create, for understanding what you are, mind. That everything around you is also created from mind, there is no difference between you and a flower.
Between you and the sky, you are all those things, because all those, the same as you are just a manifestation of the one great mind. Speak to it with wonder and curiosity and it will show you.

I definitely agree with what has been said here.
Imo you should take a break and Integrate.
And WD is right, 60mg is a big dose, I personally can breakthrough with 20mg if I'm relaxed enough, 30mg is my go to dose.

Safe traveling though. And I always tell people to embrace the experience no matter what, breaking through (albeit the goal) is not hugely important (to me).

Happi travels

I had my first experiences last weekend, My first hit was 2 tokes of 20mg loaded in a pipe, I felt a sensation and minor visuals, but felt I needed more to breakthrough, Instantly, I then loaded an unmeasured amount (probably double, so 40mg give or take) into the pipe and tapped that on 2 tokes...

I was gone... Although personally I didn't fear the experience it most certainly wasn't a calm or pleasant trip, My body was paralyzed for over 10 minutes and then only started seeing strait around 10 minutes later. My entities were unhappy with me for sure.

I've been micro-dosing every other day since Monday using an E-cigarette vape, 15mg of the good stuff in 1ml of liquid. 2 hits gets me relaxation and visuals with calmer entities, although a fairly weak signal with full body movement and awareness still active.

I'm currently figuring things out, how to focus, not to lose focus, being aware of the whole vision and not just the entities distracting me.

I planned on hitting the pipe tonight but I have a little anxiety doing so, a lot is do with how I jumped into it without full knowledge of what I was getting into, now I'm just obsessed with this forum of such wonderful information in hoping to effectively and consistently breakthrough without getting bitchslapped.

My 22 items on Amazon's order list can validate that claim.
I think Changa is my way forward.

Hopefully one day we can both understand the teachings and become wise and benevolent as our trusty nexus peers.

Thanks for all the support and help guys.
Just for the record, I've been having a lot of success lately.
I still don't break through to often but when I do it's awesome.