What is there to say about what happened when I smoked dmt? It's been almost five years since I did it. I've only ever done it once in my lifetime. That one time however was very effective. What I saw and where I was resonates inside me and I can not turn my back on knowing.

Hi, I'm a 29 year old artist/painter living in the usa.

A great deal of my childhood was hopefully by most standards chaotic. I did suffer childhood molestation for many years. As I grew into an adult not properly coping or even admitting what had happened led to a combination of mental aliments including symptoms of ptsd, social anxiety/agoraphobia, addiction problems with xanex, and self harm (cutting). At 24 I attempted suicide and failed and that's when I decided to try smoking dmt.

Both before and after trying dmt I've dabbled in other substances including shrooms (around a douzen times), lsd (once), 4ho-met (once), 4-aco-dmt (twice), ald-52 (once), mdma (twice), and lsa via Hawaiian baby wood rose seeds (once). I currently take no prescriptions but do use cannabis at the very least weekly or more. My last psychedelic trip was the ald-52 6 months ago.

I know there are many people (maybe not on this forum though) who don't think that psychedelics can aid in treating my mental illness but I think that's wrong. I do think that the trips I've gone on (dmt being the most impactful) have served as invaluable aids in my recovery, healing, and understanding.

I feel as if I need to play a part in conveying what I've been through to others and on a larger scale take part in the multiple revolutions that society and the earth are going through. I know no matter what I type in here about my experiences in life were it's all going to fall short of reality. Still, I feel in my core there will be people who know with clear primal instinct what I am saying. ...That we've all met before. That we are linked and interconnected in ways that no one talks about or can even put into words. We all feel the suffering of what's happening in the world and the exchange of energy that happens when we choose to love.

One of my most recent pieces, unfinished; I used acrylic paint, marker, pens: https://i.imgur.com/XCw2bFk.jpg

I'm grateful I'm here.

Welcome to the Nexus!

If anything, you can find comfort in the fact that you've found a community of individuals who share a common interest: helping each other. Psychedelics are wonderful tools too for helping with some of the issues you've mentioned. As you have already seen, they are catalysts for change and can really help nudge us in the right direction. Used in combination with a proper set/setting and a willing attitude, some incredible results can be had. They can't (and shouldn't) replace medical professionals but they certainly can take away some stress/anxiety and can help people move forward and in a positive direction in their lives.

Connecting on the forum is great, and the Nexus is one of the best out there! I'm sure you will meet and get along with a lot of us goofy people, assuming we don't scare you off!



Be sure to check out the chat too if you are looking for quicker interactions! Anyway, nice to have you here.

Have a good day!

Edit: Awesome artwork, btw!!

A true warm welcome to you!! Thank you for sharing something so personal!

I think it's great that you persevered through the difficulties life handed you! I can relate to this very much. You have eloquently described your own healing in a way that shows what is at the other end of suffering. You, my friend, are beautiful person!

I love your artwork!! Post some artwork on in the art section at some point. I am an amateur artist myself. I practice and practice everyday. I can't wait until I can paint something as good as your art!

Welcome to the nexus!

hey
good to have you here, hope you hop on chat moar too, and congrats on the elevation of your issues
artwork = 100%

Tough Story Blissabyss, You are not alone and I wish you well in your journey.

I really like your artwork and know you have talent. Stick with it

Welcome!

Thank you for posting your story. I'm sure the more you explore on here you will come across similar life experiences where DMT or another psychedelic has opened another world perspective for those of us who suffered (or are currently suffering) a mental/physical anguish from a traumatic past (whether from childhood or last week). I too had my share of anxiety, depression, anger, mental and physical health problems...all from self coping, self medicating, not knowing whom to speak to, not wanting to speak at all. I am not as experienced in the psychedelic realm as most members or even it would seem yourself, but I must agree that my DMT travels have been the most profound and have lightened the burden that I placed upon myself all these years. I wish you well in your continuing journey of healing and exploration with these substances and hope to see more posts and art! I'm grateful you are here also. Much love!

Wow what a beautiful story.. Im happy for your journey brother! Much respect.

Love is key and your art is awesome!

Thanks for all the kind replies.

That art is beautiful. Very impressive. I'm new here myself, but welcome!

HOLY MOLLY that art is great. If one has hang ups about a certain thing they should experience that hang up. For instance if you are afraid of dogs you should find a calm dog to pet.

I have to state up front that I rarely ever do such a thing for someone who has only offered up two posts on the forum here, but your sincere, heartfelt intro (regardless of your awesome art; BTW, keep up the good work with that!), along with its attention to relevant detail, has led my heart to give you a vote up for full membership at this early stage in your Nexus career.

Don't disappoint me now blyssabyss!

Thank you.