Hi Nexus,

Let me say first that I absolutely love this forum. Good to see such friendly, polite, intellectual community. I'm glad to become a part of it at last.

My story:

I'm 32.

My journey began when I was 18. I took a heroic dose of Ps. Semilanceata - I didn't know how to make a proper dose because I never took psychedelics before. One hour after ingestion my ego dissolved into nothing. There's no need to describe the experience itself in details - I think people on this forum have experienced that many times. When I was back, I realized that from now on my life won't be the same anymore.

When I was 23 I had another notable near-death experience from extremely high dose of DXM (by mistake again - later I found that my scales were broken. The dose was very close to lethal). I found myself in a dark silent timeless space. I was surrounded by 5 persons. We were standing in a ring of green fire. I wasn't able to see their faces. At the same time I found some strange and absolutely new feeling inside of me. It was hard to understand what it is because I never felt it before. And then I realized... that feeling are thoughts of 5 persons surrounding me! I can read their thoughts! I was shocked to death. That was like in Robert Monroe books when you get a "ball of packed thoughts" and you need to unpack it. So I started to unpack... And I found that there was nothing but overwhelming, mind-blowing Love. I could feel it almost as a wind. It was very cold Love, without any tint of pleasure as we usually experience it on psychedelics. That was very "one-way" Love if that makes sense. One strong flow from them - to me. Without any tiniest expectation of good response from my side as we humans usually do. That was true Unconditional Love. I continued with unpacking... And then I found other parts of the message: they were very, very disturbed about me. They knew that I'm in trouble and that I shouldn't be there. And they were ready to help. I felt very clear that their devotion to me is so incredibly strong that they can sacrifice their own existence - right now, without asking for any reward - only to save me. That was incredible. I still can't fit that into my head. I'm still guessing who they were. Robert Monroe says that those "helpers" are your own next reincarnations. Well if that's true and if I'm going to become those guys one day, then human life definitely worth that.

But you read this message which means they saved me somehow. Hey guys! Thank you so much for saving me. And hope to meet you (become you?) again one day.

Soon after that I packed my backpack, left a note to my parents that I'm leaving to forest and I will never be back.

And I spent 3 years in forest. Yep. I was searching for knowledge. Those were the most exciting years of my life. Have you seen the movie "Into the wild"? That's my story. But I had a happy end - I survived.

Still in forest, I got ayahuasca. I have taken it about 5 times. Ayahuasca told me all I needed to know - why we are here, why it's so important to get through an experience of human life, and what is Love. After that I realized that I don't need to live in forest anymore. I realized that I want to go back home. I want to hug my Mother and tell her how much I love her.

Then I returned back home. My mother was very glad to see me again, and so were my friends. I got married and I have the most beautiful wife in the world. And now we together are spreading the message of Love.

Wellcome to the Nexus!
Sounds like an intense experience. Glad to have you here telling us your storry

That's an awesome story brother. Welcome!

Whoa man. I was extremely close to doing that too a few years ago. I had the note written, and was on the Complete Purchase screen for my plane ticket. Something held me back. A commitment to something that I need to see through before I leave society.

Amazing story, glad you're still here to tell the tale!

Welcome to the Nexus, really great bunch here.

Looking back to myself 10 years ago when I did that - I'm shocked to see how desperate and fearless I was. There's no chance I would do that nowadays. I was young and so crazy. Funny thing that I left society to spend the rest of my life alone but that experience provided me a totally opposite: I found that love, relations and friendship are the only things which are worth to live for. I needed that lesson. Many people don't because they have that knowledge from a moment of birth.

Hi electro, welcome to the Nexus.

Since you seem to like the Monroe books, you might get something (or alot?) out of this talk:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P0FuXKHzE2c

It's long, but it puts a lot of things in Monroe books into perspective. Like entities, "the park", the various focus states etc. You may want to split it up and listen to it in chunks, since I can't listen to them in one sitting.

This one is also very supplemental and instructive regarding to the books and helped me to gain a deeper understanding of his theories:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GSBM7Qeo5bg

Edit: the Monroe vid is explanational in a more general view, where as the TC vid is very technical and procedural. Both complement each other greatly.

That's interesting, thank you so much!

You're welcome. Hope they provide you with a deeper understanding - for me, I'm still scratching the surface.

Ufostrahlen, do you have any success with OBEs? They were easy and frequent when I was 18 but no luck nowadays. Just some spontaneous lucid dreams may be 2-3 times a year (looking at hands Castaneda-way, realizing that you're dreaming etc.) but no OBEs at all.

Welcome!

No, no luck at all. I blame my caffeine consumption which causes too much tensions, but I find it hard to stop. I guess I should consider myself lucky not be an opiate or nicotine addict Let's say that my consciousness is very addicted to my physical body.

But do you meditate regularly? Mindfulness is connected to lucid dreaming, which is the less aware sibling state of the OBE state. I think all OBE teachers I've come across recommend and practice it regularly. I mostly have the discipline to do it daily.

And then you have the (cholinergic or psychedelic) psychotropic drugs that can help you meddling with your REM sleep (which is connected to lucid dreaming) and the 4 hz / 7 hz / theta - Monroe / binaural beats tracks. Do those help?

For me they do very little, but once in a while I get near the lucid state, where I recognize the dream within the dream, but then just proceed, because for whatever reason, my dream character isn't very impressed. For me, a reoccurring dream sign is a crashing airplane (mostly a 747 or a F-22). But when my dream character recognizes such an event he's like: meh, a dream, whatever and proceeds on. Very weird, but a matter of fact.

Oh, lets not forget I had a precognitive dream 2 weeks ago, but I'm definitely not an OBEr, only an adept.

whose not?


tried them many years ago, they just made me a bit sleepy, nothing fancy.

I had awesome OBE when I was 16. Out of nowhere I found myself on a street near my house. I was hearing a strange deep roaring sound. It was winter time. I was seen snowflakes silently falling from the sky. Then I realized that sound comes from a nearby car. I was looking at car's license sign (car's number). Everything was clear as in real life. I knew it wasn't a dream and I was really scared. Next moment I woke up, ran to the window - there was that same car with the same number sign as in my "dream".

Beautiful intro, thx for sharing Electro.

Would be great to read a bit more on your journey's.

Peace, Light, Love

Those 3 years in forest deserve writing a book I could write more details about the journey in this thread when I have more time.

And I will repeat again that when I was back to society and told my story to one of my friends he made big eyes and asked me: "Have you seen the movie "Into the wild"? That's new movie and it's all about you!" (The movie was made in 2007 when I was out). What makes that movie very special is the fact that it's based on a real story. Interesting how the same story repeats for people living far away from each other. I watched the movie the next day and after a final scene where that guy died my eyes were full of tears. I didn't expect such end. And do you remember one of his last notes in the notebook? "Happiness is only real when shared". I came to the same conclusion at the end of my journey. I'm so sad for that guy he didn't have a chance to get back home with that.

Thats great man, Im no full member here, but Im no stranger to things. Please spread the thruth.

Hey, so you no longer need to BELIEVE, you KNOW. I guess it's much easier then and you only need to practice to have more of those.

Have a look at these threads if the 3h of video aren't enough:

https://www.dmt-nexus.me...aspx?g=posts&t=68299
https://www.dmt-nexus.me...aspx?g=posts&t=68113

It mainly boils down to: meditation, meditation, meditation. Binaural beats are supposed to help, too, but don't spend money on them, they are freely available and even the most exclusive and elaborate ones (like the TMI ones) just use 4hz-theta entrainment. There's nothing elaborate about them in 2016.