Last night I planned on tripping acacia confusa and syrian rue. For reasons I wont go into I didnt take the shot last
night but early this afternoon, about 130. I started by drinking the rue tea, I drank half the rue tea and the second cup about 30 min later. As soon as my skin started to feel tingly I drank the acacia reduction. I didnt feel the slightest bit of nausea. Thinking this was because of an overnight decant I settled in for the out thirty minutes later I got a text from a friend of mine telling me she has strep throat and she would not be sitting me. We exchanged texts about the time I really started to feel the nausea come on. I puked really hard, then came the diarea. I figured the trip was a bust, that I had puked too soon. Just as well right? No sitter to throw wood on the fire when it got low. Nothing to do but stoke the flames, lay back down and wait for the effects to wear off. I fully expecred to be in normal headspace within an hour or so, closed my eyes and enjoyed the rue buzz.

At this point I really lost sense of time but I started noticing some mild cev's; didn't think much of it though. Maybe an hour and a half in I opened my eyes and wouldnt you know it, full blown geometric visuals. I wasn't coming down, I was on my way up. This stuff comes on really slow. I'm used to mushroom tea, 15 min and I feel it. Not with this acacia confusa, I swear this had to take an hour thirty min... says the man who had no reliable sense of time. However long it took it was creeping.

DMT has a personality, definitely not me. I was looking for some comfort, connecting with whatever it is that inhabits psychedelic space. On mushrooms I've had some very peaceful experiences and things have been prerty rough of late. I was hoping to have my attitde adjusted. You know that trip that leaves you on cloud nine for the next month or two? The kind of trip where some fool can cut you off and drop his speed by 10 mph and it doesn't phase you. That is the trip I was looking for.

That is not the trip I received. I couldn't tell you now long it was before the trip went from usual mild geometric visuals to images of people I love and fhe definite sense of something else showing up. And it was speaking to me. Not in an audible voice although I've heard that before. I saw no floating entities or machine elves, not a voice... it was more like what I imagine telepathy to be. Anyway I saw visions (eyes open and closed), a kaleidoscope of my friends and family, situations and interactions. In all of them I was being a real jerk. I was seeing all the ways I've been failing as a lover and a friend.

All in all, it was starting to be what I thought was going to be a really bad trip. I've had my fair share of trips and while I'm no Mckenna I know set and setting are super important. I can't tell you how perfect my set and setting are right now. I also know how to handle a bad trip. I tried changing location and lighting, staggered outside for some fresh air... nothing working I crawled into bed and hid beneath the covers; literally writhing. At this point I tried negotiating with this thing. Please I thought, just give me a break. I know I've been taking a hammer to the things I love lately but give me some sugar with this medicine.

No matter how I much I agreed with this thing assessment of me it refused to let up. It was relentless. Looking back, I was a captive audience and I wasnt going anywhere. Eventually, I just gave in and stopped fighting. That didn't really make things any better, I just had no more fight left. I felt like that dog scientists electrocuted till it just lay down and lost continence.

After a few hours, maybe three the pressence left as quickly as ir had come, and I was stuck trying to find meaning in the curb stomping I had just received. The visuals continued for more than another hour, its only now that I'm back to normal space. Just geometrics, when the thing left it took the images of my loved ones with it, which was some comfort at least. Feeling the way I felt, I really did not want to look at them.

Since the visions ended I've had a little time to process and I'm closer to getting a grip on what just happened. I was being told to love the people in my life and to stop ignoring and denying thenissues that have crept up, starting to become mountains. All from lazziness and fear. That stuff can be paralyzing. Anyhow, I am still going over this, thats whh I'm sharing,I'd really like a recors to refer. I will add more as I get more but dont expect a response. You input is welcome though.

Acacia really comes on slow, glad I dsnt go anywhere thinking I wasnt going to trip. LoL

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