Hello all,
I thought it would do well to introduce myself to you by describing my first experience with ayahuasca.
It all began back nearly a year ago when I began watching documentaries about DMT. My first being DMT The Spirit Molecule as it was conveniently on Netflix. Since the day I watched the documentary my curiosity grew stronger with each and every documentary watched. I was drawn to ayahuasca the most considering the consumption method is the oldest know and researched method. It also appealed to me that I could get in touch with who I truly am.

A year later I had scrounged the web searching for a ceremony near me. I had a streak of luck and my first ceremony with my wife was scheduled 4-6-2013. We arrived in the Smokey Mountain cabin near 7:30 and were greeted by the shaman and his partner. They comforted us and helped create a peaceful atmosphere in the cabin.

They began the ceremony blessing the space in an interesting and foreign manner. I was enjoying the experience yet did not know what to think about what was happening, so without judgement, I gazed with curiosity. After the blessing was complete the shaman spoke (Spanish) and his partner translated. I do not know where the shaman was from, yet, I do know that it was Spanish and not Portuguese considering the fact that I speak and understand Spanish.

They informed us that they work with love and that our experiences would be controlled and out of love. They explained the rules of the ceremony.

-No interaction with other people during the ceremony.
-A common respect of silence during the ceremony (except if you were reacting out of emotion).
-No lights during the ceremony.
-And no leaving the home.

We began drinking the brew one by one. Each of us would go up to the shaman where we would rest our knees on a pillow while he blessed then poured the brew into what looked a bit like a shot glass. He had the most beautiful smile on his face while he handed me the cup. The drink tasted fairly decent. It reminded me of black licorice. I then sat at my pillow and tried to rest my mind. They reminded us that after an hour we could partake in a second dosing if desired. Then they turned out all lights and blew out the candles to leave us in darkness.

I truly began feeling a slight lightheaded like buzz nearly five minutes after drinking and a slight knot in the stomach. This knot was minor compared to that of eating psilocybin mushrooms. It seemed in about 20 minutes from drinking the brew, I had a hard time seeing. The term I use to describe it is known as double vision, yet it was more like kaleidoscope vision. It became difficult to feel where I was in relation to my surroundings. I had reached for another pillow yet it was closer than I had expected. Everything, including the shaman, appeared closer than I had perceived they were.

A candle was lit by the shaman once again. This was to signify to partaking of the second dose. The shaman was truly closer than I had perceived as I had mentioned before. Yet this seemed to happen nearly two hours after the first dosing. Had time slowed or did they take a longer time to offer it?

The second dosing happened in the same manner as the first except they did not go through the blessings of the room, nor the explanation of the rules or ceremony.

I really did not feel any different after the second dose than I did the first dose. I had no profound visions and woke in the morning with a minor headache.

After the ceremony the shaman had informed everyone that the doses we took were less than what most shamans in the Amazon give. They said they wanted people minds to stay in the room and not wander into other dimensions. Although I was hoping for a traditional dose, I was happy with my experience. I know that my next will be much more intense.

I had suffered from depression for many years. This condition runs and my family, and since taking the ayahuasca, I have not been depressed. I have also been thinking much more clearly, which I like a lot. I am much more at peace. I have been having epiphanies lately here and there about how to be a better person, change my life, change the way I think, change the way I act, and enjoy a more fulfilled life. These were all of my reasons for taking the medicine and I am sincerely grateful that I had.

One thing that I had noticed about the people that had partook in the ceremony with us was that they all had some sort of lingo that I was unfamiliar with. Terms such as higher self, third eye, love frequency, and other sorts of forgotten terms were tossed around as if they were greatly know truths. I know nearly nothing of these terms and did not experience those things. I want to add my own opinion to this situation. I had spoken to some of the people that night and they told me to never do ayahuasca without a shaman. I considered, since they speak of terms that I do not fully trust as true, those people may not be the best people to entrust in answering the question if I may take ayahuasca without a shaman. Any thoughts?

Greeting Ryanlawsons,

you mentioned: "I really did not feel any different after the second dose than I did the first dose. I had no profound visions and woke in the morning with a minor headache."

This seems very ODD to me personally. I have never done traditional Ayahausca, but I have done Pharamausca several times even one time taking a very small dose of 20mg DMT although the visions were mild there was for sure visions and closed eye visuals although just not super bright like on 75mg+ Pharma or 30-60mg smoked. (which will blast you out of your body so hard into another realm! As I am sure you have heard correctly from many sources)

Either this Shaman's dose was EXTREMELY mild, or his MAOI didn't do much for you, or you weren't actually drinking Ayahuasca or maybe other things happened.

I sincerely hope you have other chances to experience it. You could always brew your own and test it with a sitter. At least then you know exactly what your putting into your body and the amounts.

Shamans are just guides with experience. It is of my humble opinion that if you have a kind heart and open mind you can become your own shaman and start to explore into other realms within or out on your own.

Best Wishes,