Hello drew33333,
Welcome to the Nexus. That was a great Introduction Essay - thanks so much for taking the time to write it out.
I am so sorry about your reference to a rough life. It seems many folks who are "re-entry students" to psychedelics, and/or the other realms are coming back after terrible times, rocky lives, combat or prison exposure, terrible medical issues (sounds like you can relate), etc.
I particularly love welcoming you folks who come back in your 30's or middle age after a long break. Mainly because I was the same way. In coming back to tripping, this time for healing and midlife crisis issues, I found I went much deeper than in my youth when I tripped just to get "high." And then DMT, ahhh, what a crazy surprise!
Not sure what to offer in terms of guidance other than check out the forum in an in depth manner - it is a huge resource. We are in a time of transition. Our primary DMT plant MHRB is no longer available. Thus, folks are using other plants, such as acacias, as well as new teks. And an exciting trend is the push to procure seeds and/or live plants and literally, grow our own entheogens.
So, maybe by way of re-entry, you might want to look into a mushroom grow and try various doses. A heavy mushroom trip has some DMT aspects to it.
Might want to look into light ayahuasca brews also by way of introduction.
Also, maybe seeing if acacia root bark is procurable or starting your own grow at home.
One more thing: I'm no doctor or medical professional, but you mentioned health issues and possible upcoming surgery, etc. I suggest you be in tip-top health before trying a smoked dose of freebase DMT and/or before trying a stiff ayahuasca brew. DMT definitely elevates the blood pressure and heart rate and smoked doses can do this very very fast.
Also, beware mixing MAOI plants or brews with any medications you may be taking that have warnings about MAOI's. . . .
Okay, enough of my ranting. Looking forwarding to learning more about you and again, a warm welcome.
"But even if nothing lasts and everything is lost, there is still the intrinsic value of the moment. The present moment, ultimately, is more than enough, a gift of grace and unfathomable value, which our friend and lover death paints in stark relief."-Rick Doblin, Ph.D. MAPS President, MAPS Bulletin Vol. XX, No. 1, pg. 2Hyperspace LOVES YOU