.

Wow, man. My heart goes out to you. That you came out of it with those insights shows you're on your way to enlightenment. I don't think I'm enlightened, but your report really sent some familiar chills and thrills through me of my DMT experience a year ago. All my thoughts were "breaking", just like yours, my emotions were fractalizing or something. My body slowly exploded away into blackness, where gray fractal entities danced around at me, changing their movements with my rapidly changing emotions.

There's this Doctor, Ernesto Spinelli, who says that society is obsessed with meaning, and especially dualities, like good and bad. And by giving things names we see them for what they mean to us, their use to us, and miss what they are in of themselves. We miss the ungraspable, beautiful meaninglessness of everything we generalize in this way. I know also that our minds do this to just about everything in order to not waste brain power in seeing every little pattern at once. Dr. Spinelli concludes that when we come to terms with what no one can explain for us, death -- the ultimate embodiment of meaninglessness -- all the meanings that were based on illusion are swept away, and, somewhat paradoxically, we can finally begin to live truly meaningful lives.

You say you saw that the world just is. Maybe you experienced something so new, that none of your mind was used to seeing even the tiniest fragments that made up this totally new crazy experience. So, in a way, it was the death of everything you knew, of all the meanings.

You had quite a ride, friend. Give yourself plenty of time to enjoy everything that is now new. The world welcomes you back, and beckons you to welcome yourself to all its wonderfullness; there's so much to see and do and love to feel and give!

nice trip report

criddopher,

Congrats on the experience and thanks for sharing your insights and experience with these trips.

As Dedalus mentions, the second trip parallels the ideas of enlightenment - pure existence, no 'self' or 'i'.

Much Love,

Napp

I was obliterated into that fractal landscape once and
It was the single most terrifying experience of my life .
Sounds Like you handled it amazingly well .
Congrats in your insight ..

Absolutely beautiful. Im so happy for you

.

This same thing has happened to me before. I inhaled a huge breakthrough hit and closed my eyes but didn't see any visuals (at least I thought), when I opened my eyes I wasn't in my room anymore. I was trapped in hyperspace, dead, however you want to look at it. I began begging out loud for it to return me to my body, I was trying to speak my wife and son's names but words weren't making any sense. Finally the visuals subsided enough that I could see I was still in my room and I just sat there staring at the floor, like you. Very good post, man.

criddopher,
love the report.
definitely resonated with me as
i have had similar kinds of
experiences.