Wohohoooo !!
That should have been one hell of an experience.
Nothing like i have ever read before.
Truly life changin too.

I definitely relate null. The 5meo death is insane, I struggle to remember details, but I get flashes or feelings of the spiral to death now and then. However I clearly remember that energizing breakthrough where you explode into a buzzing orb of energy expanding and contracting. Its like you just completed the last level, and defeated the game of "life on earth", you won freedom. I remember immediately as I came back to my body, and maybe even during the experience, feeling sorry for people who will never experience that feeling in their lives due to the prohibition. It really felt like god mode to me, and such a welcomed hop off of the earth/life merry-go-round.

@FiniteFox I couldnt imagine that lasting 4 hours though, thats heavy. Way to go for letting go and allowing the experience take control when you felt scared, its a tough thing to do because you always want to have at least one little finger holding the line of your sanity, but it doesnt work that way

Insightful writeup!
Remind me never to try this.

I can relate to the ˝dead for real˝ statement 100%.

Thunderbolts, carrier wave, center of my brain lights on like a light bulb after switching the switch.
For a split fraction of something i saw my self from a 3rd person view on the bed at the same time as i was also realizing that i was about to experience death. As soon as that realization was formulated and excepted i exhaled my last dying breath and there was loud pop in the center of my head and i exited my body trough the top of my head in expanding and rising spiral....then whiteout.
No memories. No me. No nothing.
Then somehow from somewhere/nowhere something woke up. It was I but not me and IT knew it had ruined a game. Lots of regret and sorrow on remembering. As human all i ever wanted is to know what is in/out there and when it happened all i wanted is to forget. What has transpired in that night was hands down one of most REAL experiences of my human life. Beyond real. Truth. Only thing that is, was and ever will be. Eternal nothing/something.

I will never be able to put any of it into words and when i try it really makes me feel like a freak.

It took me almost two years and additional experiences to finally acknowledge that i wast loosing my mind and that there are also others that have experienced similar. Where do i/we go from here? I don't know. I still have the itch and i have traveled since then but never so deep and so far since it is hands down the most intense, frightening and also beautiful mind blowing experience that you can have as human being. Imho.

Great write up! Love all the additional comments from the rest of members.

ps. It wasn't dmt. Back then i was working with mushrooms.

Thank you for sharing. You're not a freak, you're beautifully you. Seeing the ineffable doesn't give you words for description, unfortunately.

Who knows where to go? I don't know either. But wherever you go, I bet you'll go there with more grace and make the path better for wear.

Thoroughly enjoying this thread thankyou all for sharing.

I've experienced the beauty and infinite emptiness/freedom/love during what I believe was an ego death. My experiences have been limited so this thread is providing intriguing and powerful insights . I haven't even got close to what you folks are describing.

These reports are awe inspiring, demanding respect for the spice and providing cautionary tales to folks like myself who may be uninitiated in this kind of experience. I have considered this method having recently enjoyed a Rue tea Changa journey and being exposed to these powerful allies. I will proceed cautiously.

With the ego death there was definitely a point where I felt like I had to let go, I think holding on might have made for a very different experience. Although in retrospect I'm not convinced there was any real choice.

On being faced with real death I'm curious as to whether anyone has immediately come to terms, or accepted the physical death before going through the experience and returning, and if so was it as traumatic as the experiences that have been shared. I realise that it's unlikely that many would willingly dive as deep again but need to ask. Has anyone taken this particular journey more than once?

Thanks for starting this thread Finite.

The Nexus just keeps on giving.

Peace.