In response to your fear of this happening to you...just don't go overboard like I did. And if you plan on going deep, be in a safe, comfortable spot. Never had a problem with DMT until this night, every other experience changed me in the most positive manner.

Ultimately, trust yourself and do not give up. Many sound words of thoughtful advice. The only thing I would add is to sweat, a lot. Perhaps a sweat lodge or getting access to a sauna where you can take sessions would assist in your integration. Best to you...

—plex

Not sure if you're still following this post, recently heard of large MDMA doses being used to treat PTSD.

I have yet to verify this, though it'd make sense, if you wish, look into and verify this information, it may become a possibility.

Well honestly that's the last thing I'd want to do. I'm terrified of like ingesting anything like that because I seriously feel like I'll just die if I take any sort of uppers...lol. I've thought about it though..like a strong psy experience to make myself realize there's nothing to be afraid of, but my nerves would get the best of me and I think I'd just end up worse then I am.

But I'll keep it in mind for the future. I've been feeling a lot better lately with all the meditation and not thinking about all the negative things. I still feel as if I'll be forever altered from the experience and whenever people talk about anything related I can't help but bring up the chemical and talk positively about it...so I'm learning to live with the experience and embrace the good it gave me instead of the negative.

sorry for what happened to you, hyperspace surly can be really scary sometimes, but i somehow believe that when these bad trips are coming, there might be a reason for it.
even if it was a terrible and hard lesson, it is possible that it had something to teach you. it might of happened to help you change some patterns in your life that were not good for you. and it might be wise for you to contemplate about what really happened there, and try to realize if there was some kind of message hidden there for you.

in my understanding ,taking a trip to hyperspace is very much like dying,and when you come back it is like being reborn again, but you always comeback a bit different. it is possible that it might take some time to adjust to reality ,until your able to deal with the changes that happened within you.

take care

Sending my love and best wishes your way x

I've never had something that serious happen to me, but I have also had some really ****ing rough DMT experiences that had lasting aftereffects... and it took me about a year or so, but I did eventually manage to re-integrate and am a much stronger person.

It's true you learn the most from the bad trips, but that also applies not just to the trips themselves but to the effect they can have on you after that. You can ride out a bad trip. But it's not so easy to ride out a day-to-day mindset, as you know... you actually have to work to overcome it. But once you've put in that time and work, the results can be amazing.

So remember, KEEP ON TRUCKING!

this happened to me with acid, but I was being tortured by federal agents with superior technology. Some project Monarch/MK-Ultra shit. I am still scarred and this happened about a year and a half ago. It's ultimately psychological, so just get over it. You might need to change some of your long standing beliefs to do so, atleast in my case i have had to. I also had to change my life, and get away from the things that caused such an experience to occur. I honestly to this day do not know if what happened was in my head or not, and thinking about it just makes it come back. Find new and different things to focus on, and maybe one day, you can look back at that crazy trip that changed your life. Taking an extended break from pot will help. I don't want to recommend more drugs but caapi feels to me like it tweaks your brain, rewires it, this vine is fueled by love and is shining with knowledge. Best of luck ghostsquall

ive had my butt kicked and come out of it with a much deeper respect for:

1- set and setting: essential
2- ramp up dosage practice: heroic doses are not necessarily heroic! ramp up slowly even if it takes you years..one needs to develop their own relationship and pace.
3- trusting yourself: stop if it starts to feel weird ( i mean dark weird) ...each experience has its own teaching at any depth
4- keeping a blank slate: each experience is unique..if a relationship to other or other's journeys develop, then so be it, but it probably should evolve in the moment

5- not getting hung up on a single experience...you took too much bro!

that being said, i think once you are ready to try again, start really easy, and stop even if nothing happens...you will feel so healed just by approaching it again.

Awesome words. Thank you.

Yes MDMA has been used quietly by some doctors for treating PTSD for some time. I was reading an interesting article about it yesterday.

If you haven't really talked through the journey with someone close to you then it may be worth trying. You and a good buddy sit down, take some MDMA and just talk about what happened. Try to see it from a higher perspective where you can see more easily what the experience was trying to teach you.

Either it's all just a trip in your own mind or you're actually floating about in an ocean of shared consciousness that we all share. There's no way to say for sure. Either way, it's all in your head and there will be something to learn from it.

I think once you are able to see what the experience was trying to teach you, you will feel much better.

I certainly hope so anyway.

Good luck and best wishes mate.

Sending lots of love your way mate <3

I have lifted my consciousness from deep fog and anxiety with ashtanga yoga. Qualified teacher is needed whom teaches it in the tradition of Sri K.P.J. and does not make own modifications to the practice or something. and it's recommended to do it 4-6 times / week to get in the wagon.
It's powerful. The practice cleanses the nervous system, organs , and blood. It balances the body.

Helping other suffering people is also very "reality transforming" imo.

SWIM has some experience with this, not with DMT, but when he was younger 12 or so. He abused LSD and Mushrooms, he used them only to "party" and "have a good time". What he didn't realize was that with his almost daily use of these substances his mind, or spirit was opening to another world. Blindly he continued to a point were he too could not function normally in life. He became a recluse, and used more and more drugs that would numb out the way he felt. It was like he was in a constant state of Deja Vu. He could hear the thoughts rumbling around in the heads of others. The only thing that helped was time. He swore off anything that could be labeled psychedelic. Until with enough time he came to terms with his new found spirit and what he saw. He no longer uses substances that will numb him, he now uses plants to teach him, things vary much like what scared him so much before. The moral of his story is that someone who plans on using plants or substances, to better his life, must remember that they are tools, and he wouldn't try to beat on his car engine with a wrench if there was nothing that needed fixing, so he must not do the same when it comes to his own being. Sorry to hear that you have had to experience something this difficult. Just know with time, some prayer, and meditation it will get better.

Just reading through this thread for the first time. My own perspective is that it would probably be very very helpful for you to find someone that you can be totally honest with and really talk this through. That might be a non-judgmental therapist who is open to helping you unpack this experience (yes they exist) and your needs from here, or it might just be a buddy you buy a beer for every couple of weeks for a while, in exchange for them listening and supporting and knocking ideas around. But you need real dialog and sharing, an hour of good conversation, more than you can get on an internet board.

This is a great start and great group of supportive folks, don't get me wrong. But now go find someone you trust and can REALLY talk to, and do it a few times - a good deep conversation gets reflected on over the following days and leads to the need for another conversation.

My two cents. Sending light your way, my friend.

It's nearly a year later and things are a lot better. Time heals all I'd say. No anxiety but still terrified to approach the psychedelic realm in any manner. I know that will come back with time though, so I am grateful for what I can experiences now in peace. Thank you all for the helpful words. Meditation helped a ton. Will update again probably when I dive back into the realm.

Glad to "hear" that.

Would you elaborate on how meditation has helped you personally? And what kind of meditation have you been practicing.