First thanks to everyone who participate in this forum. Your experience and knowledge has help many of us on our voyages. Thanks to the information in this forum and probably some reddits i was able to break trhu after some attempts.
I´ve tought after moving between cities for a jub, that i´m a good place in my life. Everything seemes to be in order and probably doing what is "expected". A friend of mine noticed this a year ago and started pushing my buttons to try 5-meo-dmt. I live in Mexico so the setting and context was ritualistic.. chamanic.. i had a lot of stuff to learn.. i initially frowned upon ad i tough that after doing lsd some years ago, i had hung up the phone..
In the past years i tought i worked thru a "healthy" relationship with alcohol, cocaine, tabacco.. foolishness. It took a lot of insistence from my chaman friend and some stressful decisions at work to put me in a position to try the toad... Amazing. Totally changed how i perceive my life, my relationships and goals. But that´s another story. I ended up doing once every month in a half. Talking to my friends, opening up with my wife, who noticed my increased happiness baseline level.
After the first time, i needed to know more about 5-meo and NN. Needed to understand how they are not the same, as it was not just another form of DMT. So when somebody offer me 1 gram of changa i jumped onto the opportunity. It came with a lolipop pipe, and was eager to try it.. but was i going too deep? i did not have a lot of success on my first try with a pipe and second attempt with some rolled tobacco. After doing a second Bufo session. i just gave the cahnga as a gift to the chaman.
A month after he called me, to help me procure some tepezcohuite based extraction. as he wanted to do a ceremony called "nave de pakal" in his health retreat & temazcal. The comments from him was that it dindn´t work, they ended up really stoned without going any places. and gave me the DMT because it was trash. Well.. i was sure it wasn´t. so i needed to discover how. Thanks to the nexus I bought a wax vape pen and planned to wait until the chaman finishes his tour giving bufo medicine all over Europe.
I went ahead and tried it two days ago.. the chamanb would come back at the end of july.. couldn´t wait that much.. well That pre-flight jitters were there. First time. it was an unmeasured low dose. this familiar feelings inundated me. i was probably putting too much heat, and it took me for a wild ride, couldn´t break thru. it felt so similar as the last part of a 5 meo trip. Entities working on my soul, i assumed that´s the ayahuasca plane. i felt so happy, then the phone rang and had to babble on it incoherently. which grounded me and ended the trip. notice to myself. silence the phone next time. I took a walk on the beach and hit the pool with my wife. Great way to close sunday.. 3+
My workday was uneventful, good focus. some afterglow and efforts of trying to remember. But my mind was set on finishing what i started sunday. So there i was again at 7 pm loading up the vape. with a Craig Pruess album as background. Adrenaline was pumping, i breathed in & out to calm down. and nada... unsuccesful again. the spirit of a clown was almost poking fun of me. and i had to mellow some angry toughts. Either i do it right or go home. but it just didnn´t feel right. So i didn´t measure i just eyeballed and read some "techniques" for that vape.
One or two songs passed and i was ready. Breath in, breath out. and inhale. 5 seconds, keep it 5 seconds, exhale. inhale 8 seconds, keep it 8 seconds.. exhale.. breath. relax. inhale 1,2,3,4,5....
How do i know i broke thru?? well there was a celebration. 100 of home runs happened, and we hit all the jackpots at the same time. banners and cheers. jaja incredibly silly. then some funny elves started to show me their butts, pointing at their assess. almost too graphical, while this electric energy that i´m very much in love to crossed my body.
Eyes open, with complex mandalas merging with what i assumed was reality started doing loops. nonsense. My ego returned questioning what the hell.. was im on 5-meo or what and where i was. I was having a blast and everything was so familiar. couldn´t care if what i tought was the ceiling led lamps, started popping and jumping into places behaving as it they were part of a hayao miyazaki movie.
I started to laugh about the elves pushing it a bit too much to be pornographical.. i knew it was all a joke. Probably a good 15-20 minutes had passed and felt sharp enough to continue my day. Had a business dinner with a few glasses of wine. Felt a little bad about it. But decided to not to take it too seriously. How could i?
Thanks againg to everyone!
Good read buddy congratulations welcome too the nexus
Daytripper.....