Namaste, fellow seekers and sadhakas!
I stumbled upon this site while doing research into ayahuasca a few months ago and have returned many times to learn more. In the interest of learning more deeply and hopefully being able to contribute to the ongoing dialogue here, I have decided that I should register and seek membership. Since this is an ‘introduction essay’ it would behoove me to describe myself and my background.
In my youth, late teens and early twenties, ganja, LSD and psilocybe cubensis mushrooms were all pretty easy to acquire. These became my mind-altering substances of choice. While many of my friends saw them as simply recreational, to me they always had a deeper aspect, spiritual perhaps, or psychologically medicinal. As I got older psychedelics (other than herb) became increasingly rare in my life, and alcohol took up more of my time. I was living in a college town and the stuff was ubiquitous, not that that is a good excuse, but it’s the only one I’ve got.
By my late twenties I felt that I was nearing something of an inflection point, I suppose. I began researching natural entheogens and was able to acquire some. LSD had pretty much been relegated to my past, but I found that morning glory seeds gave me a nostalgic taste of that feeling. Then I found some sacred cactus. The handful of times I experienced the power of this plant ally were some of the most exhilarating and revelatory I have ever had. It didn’t just open and expand my mind, it also touched my heart and gave me a new sense of joy and connectedness. Next I explored ayahuasca. I don’t feel that I was fully prepared. The three times that I drank the sacred tea it really overwhelmed my senses. Integrating the experiences was difficult, even though the experiences themselves weren’t “bad” just more than I was ready for at that time in my life.
Throughout my thirties the only psychedelics I used were ganja (plenty of that) and the occasional foray into lysergic headspace granted by the power of tlitliltzin, the magical morning glory. Mostly alcohol became my go-to mind-altering substance, that and ganja. I have always been a seeker though. Alcohol can be relaxing and enjoyable, but it can also be deadening. In my late thirties I sought connection to the spiritual via a daily yoga and meditation practice, which I have maintained consistently for the last six years. Recently my search has brought me back to the powerful plant allies, the entheogens used by seekers and shamans for millennia. I found some Hawaiian baby wood rose seeds, which provide that same lysergic rush of sensation as tlitliltzin without having to eat dozens or hundreds of little seeds. I am now trying to grow this plant. I’ve had luck growing morning glories in the past, but these might be more difficult. We shall see.
More recently I discovered the box in my closet containing sections of whole ayahuasca vine, a bag of dried chacruna, and a bag of peganum harmala seeds. I am still saving the chacruna and fear it may have lost potency over the many years. The rue seeds are still active. I am hopeful for the vine, but for now I am saving it. Just in the last month I stumbled upon some jurema inner root-bark …quite a coincidence. (Or is it?) In any case I shall be posting experience reports from my three evenings with the sacred teas that I brewed from harmala and jurema. This rue-mimosa ayahuasca analogue seems to work quite well, though I am eager to brew the true ayahuasca again once I am fully confident in my brewing technique. I don’t want to waste my precious aya vine or chacruna leaf!
Hopefully membership in the DMT-Nexus will grant me the opportunity to make new friends who are fellow seekers. In addition to fellowship with all of you seekers access to your vast storehouse of collective knowledge greatly appeals to me as well. Mostly I am interested in learning about ayahuasca and other natural plant allies, as well as their intersection with spirituality; complicated chemical extractions and smokable DMT are of secondary interest to me. (My main solvents shall be water and vinegar.) Perhaps I may also have the chance to share some knowledge of my own and benefit others. There is a saying popular among the devotees of Saraswati, Goddess of knowledge and the arts: “Of all the riches that humans possess knowledge is unique in that the more you give it away the more it grows” (paraphrased) …in other words we learn from teaching. I hope to be both a student and a teacher here on the Nexus.
I'm very grateful to be here and very eager to learn more and to make new friends!
🙏🏼 🕉 📿 🔱
ॐ शान्तिः शान्तिः शान्तिः
om̐ śāntiḥ śāntiḥ śāntiḥ