Hi everyone, on Saturday I had a mushroom session and I would like to share it with you. It was a difficult experience and I would love to have some feedback. I'm not a native English speaker so be patient with me haha.
I have some experience with mushrooms and DMT, lately being more interested in DMT because of the shorter duration and the fact that the few last mushrooms trips have been kind of hard.
I planned this like 3 weeks ago, this was the only weekend I would have just to myself in some time. I had a healthy diet the 3 days previous and didn't eat for 5 hours previous the experience. The mushrooms (1,64 grams) were taken in an infusion with Melissa officinalis, Foeniculum vulgare, and honey. The shrooms were P. cubensis var. mexicana, homegrown. The time of ingestion, 17:30.
After 15 min of meditation I took the infusion (free from solids) and went out for a walk, I live in the country so have a lot of private space without risk of interruptions. As always the first effects started at about 15 min, with yawns and a feeling of rubber legs. When this started, I went back home and got in my hammock. While I was in the hammock I started to have some light visuals with my eyes closed, dynamics geometrical patrons which changed in colors. I felt like strong energy traveling through my body, something pretty normal when I take mushrooms. At one moment, I had to go to pee, and that's when I start seeing patterns in the walls and feeling full effects, so decided to go inside.
Usually, I try to go with the flow, and if I feel I have to do something, I just do it, so once inside I lay in my couch and cover completely with a blanket. Here it got only weird. My breath got short and superficial, and I started to feel amazingly comfortable and warm. It felt just like being in the womb and I felt so secure that didn't want to uncover, so just let myself go on the trip. After like 40 min of this I uncovered, and that's when it got hard. Suddenly I started to feel anxious and paranoid. I have to recognize here that my last 3 trips with mushrooms had moments of paranoia, will go into more details later. In these case, I can remember it started with an idea that I got, something like "there is something bad inside me" more or less, can't remember exactly now. These feelings got stronger and stronger. At one moment I had to go out to change the setting. Only then started to feel better, but the feeling that something had gone wrong (or that I had something bad inside) kept with me the rest of the day. Once outside the effects started to dissipate, and like 4 hours after the ingestion i was pretty much with residual effect.
For the record, my most relevant source of paranoia is the feeling of madness. I know that that's not a real problem, if I had some mental problem it would already be present (I'm 31 years old and acceptably normal, maybe just a little antisocial haha), but that idea still rises in my mind during some trips.
I have to say that usually I take mushrooms during the night and go directly to bed with candles and incense, but this time I wanted to try a different approach.
So, here are a few things that arise to me during and after the trip.
Based on my experience, I'm starting to get the idea that mushrooms work a lot better during the night. What's your opinion on that? My last couple of trips have been during the day and got really confusing, it gets difficult for me to remember the events. I think it is because mushrooms are, for me, more introspective and during the day that gets more difficult. What do you think about this?
Also, how common is to have anxiety and paranoid feelings? With DMT I get them when I smoke it frequently (like 2 times in the same day, or 2 days in a row). I think is my mind telling me to wait and prepare more. But with mushrooms, I've been doing them like 2 or 3 times a year so there is a lot of time to integrate previous experience and prepare for the next.
Please feel free to comment, and thank you!