Hello all!

I'd like to introduce myself - duh! You can call me Mr. Jackpots - the name comes from an episode of the recent series of Twin Peaks that I'm quite fond of.

I've been exploring altered states of consciousness since my early teens. I certainly began too young. I decided to embark on an ego-driven, pseudo-spiritual quest for higher consciousness when I was 13 or 14 after reading Ram Dass's "Be Here Now." The concept of freeing myself from suffering and/or becoming enlightened really appealed to me, but I think that was due to the fact that I was seriously hurting inside. During this period I had to deal with some traumatic family issues and several debilitating mental health problems. Anxiety and depression led to a destructive cycle. Instead of spiritual growth, I found myself addicted to intravenous heroin on and off (but mostly ON) for the better part of a decade. Not only had I given up on what many once considered to be a promising life, but I stole from, lied to, and caused immense pain to everybody around me. I've been in jails, institutions, and been revived after overdosing multiple times.

It took a hell of a lot of hard work to battle back against addiction and begin to heal the wounds. I thought it was impossible to be anything but miserable. These days, however, things have turned around completely. I'm doing awesome! Just last week I graduated college with a bachelor's in mathematics and computer science. Never in my life have I been happier or healthier than I am right now. Quite a few of my close friends and acquaintances that I'd known since childhood were not as fortunate as I have been and did not make it out the other side.

The reason I'm posting here on DMT-Nexus is entheogens played an extremely significant role in helping me get to this point. A combination of psychedelic experiences, meditation (particularly with two lovely Sri Lankan Buddhist monks that helped me a ton), and therapy led to a complete revamping of my thinking. These days I don't touch anything that is purely for euphoria - alcohol, cocaine, amphetamines, opiates, benzodiazepines, anything that I feel can be easily abused or potentially addictive I steer clear of.

I look at entheogens with serious amount of respect and know that it is absolutely vital to prepare as much as possible for such powerful experiences. I love science and reading. I'm either an atheist or a Spinozist depending when you ask. I am always down to learn and my goal in life is to leave this world a tiny bit better than it was before I came into it. I believe that DMT-Nexus can help provide me with information necessary in order to both be safe and get the most out of my psychedelic experiences. I'd also like to give back and share my own knowledge, experiences and insights with others whenever beneficial.

I guess that covers the basics. Thank you for allowing me to become part of such an insightful community. I have the utmost respect for you guys and the projects that go on here.

-Mr Jackpots

Welcome to the Nexus!
How you presented yourself is what we really like around here.
Use the Nexus to your advantage to grow intellectually and spiritually.
Post some reports, I look forward to reading them.
Happy travels my friend.

Welcome, mrjackp0ts!

That's a very good example of how to write an introductory essay - new members take note...

Looking forward to hearing more from you.

Sending hugs from across the Atlantic,

df0

Thank you both for the warm welcome!

df0: Love your signature! I just finished a class in my final semester with my favorite philosophy professor ever (I took him four semesters in a row) titled "Labor, Class and Ethics." We discussed Proudhon and anarchism at length and it was really enjoyable, interesting stuff!

Edit: Now that I think about it, I might've confused Sorel with Proudhon. I really got into the whole property/proprietor/posession thing though. I definitely lean more towards the socialist side than anarchist.

Welcome to the Nexus!

Sounds like an intense path you've taken so far! I'm glad you are doing much better now

Have you had the opportunity to say you're sorry to the people you hurt during your darker times?

Regarding psychedelics/entheogens, what have you been experimenting with lately? Do you have any experience with extractions too?

Be well!

Hey there, endlessness! Thanks for the welcome!

To say the path I took was "intense" would be an understatement! It was very, very rough. A lot of pain and suffering. However, these experiences made me who I am today, so I think it's foolish to shut the door on the past.

I have apologized to as many of the people I've hurt as I possibly can. The words, however, are merely a minuscule piece of making amends. I feel that the best way to apologize is to live my life in a healthy way and help others. Doing nice things for people without taking credit or looking for recognition. Giving back to those who are suffering the way I did in the past. Being the best son, brother, grandson, friend, and so on to all of the people I damaged. Being responsible. Being there for my loved ones. Seeing my mother's face after my graduation ceremony, I just... it's very obvious to me that she's proud of me once again and it's the best feeling in the world. It might take the rest of my life to apologize through my actions but that's what I'm determined to do.

Lately, I've been experimenting with LSD and psilocybin. In my recent experiences, psilocybin has been a lot more beneficial in terms of insight and internal growth. Don't get me wrong, I've learned a lot from LSD, but lately psilocybin has been taking me to a place more beautiful than I ever could've dreamed of.

I've never done a full extraction by myself, but I did assist a close friend in a little 100g (I think?) MHRB extraction with Cyb's SALT tek a while ago. I'm definitely very interested in performing my own extraction, but I'm not sure I feel 100% ready just yet. It doesn't seem overly difficult, but I'm a little nervous and I feel it's better to be safe than sorry.

Thanks again! I look forward to spending time here

Loved reading your post as it sparked of genuine honest and open disclosure which is a breath of fresh air.

As for me, I prefer to keep things more natural and as close to nature as I can get with minimal processing involved as a general rule. I'm one of those fools that is foolish enough to think that food slow cooked on the grill outside tastes better than food that is simply microwaved and therefore provides for a better experience.

I take the same outlook when I'm working with pejuta.

I *think* I see what you're getting at. You're less interested in extractions and more down to make tea or eat a cactus? Something along those lines?

Thanks and hello!