I'd like to start off to say I'm Grateful for the opportunity to be part of this forum. Thanks for all the input guys.

Whilst I'm no stranger to all things mood altering for many years with the occasional rest in various institutions. I've pretty much tried most things and I've had more than my fair shares of associated problems that come with walking that trail/trial.

The past few years dependency and escapism has has not been an issue. It has taken me many years to come to that place of choice.

Most of my recent research has been in the form of youtube which is easy to absorb whilst I'm pottering around at home as I have external forces which distract me often.

My first experience following an amount of research was a game changer. I hear a lot of people talk about the effects and eye candy but for me the effect hit me a couple of days later when I noticed subtle but distinct changes to the way I related to the world and myself. Little things like doing the washing up after dinner and NOT waiting till I had no plates left.
I've hoovered up more in the past 4 weeks than I have in the past 4 years. I kid you not!
I've stopped smoking cigarettes and numerous other addictions and distractions have become insignificant.

I find the experience overwhelming but trusting it more as I progress, I have not been to that place, that I understand to be breakthrough, but very close.

My journeying started in my mid teens and had an initial moment of epiphany and felt enlightened. which quickly became self abuse for many years with dependency to various things and as a coping strategy to deal with the chaos I was creating in my life. To say I have historically been drawn to excess, is an understatement.

So for all my experiences with various religions, yoga classess, macrobiotic cookery, 12 step fellowships,social groups, chems and potions, nothing has induced so a positive effect with sometimes, little effort from my part. Nothings come even close. Wow! The earth is not flat!

I've had significant training in harm reduction and had a career in helping and been vaguely aware of tribal rites of passage and healing brews. Now in my late years this is the time.

There's a lot to learn here and I hope to be useful member of this community and following sufficient education I will be able complete the question aware without feeling such a doughnut.

Wellcome brussh and thanks for your introduction. I really enjoyed reading your story! I can totally relate to the effects and these little changes.

Hey brussh, welcome

All those positives you're experiencing, that's great, ride that momentum.






That's good to hear. Trust is very important. One of the main ingredients ime.

Hi brussh,

Thanks for the introduction and welcome to the nexus. It's nice when these little changes occur, like a gentle push in the right direction. Bad habits can be a slippery slope but so can good habits. I don't think the mind or the universe differentiates. So if you take those little nudges and form good habits from them, replacing bad habits, you're well on the way of improving your life.

Sometimes we think that everything achievable has to be achieved in a hard way. That tremendous amounts of effort are involved. And in a way effort has to be present, but also -as they say in yoga - a balanced amount of ease. If getting there is really hard, perhaps we're going about it the wrong way. Progress or healing, growth or learning - these things shouldn't be chores or feel like punishment for being innately flawed. It's a playful journey where we explore and err and occasionally step in the right direction. And if we allow ourselves to play it looks like we're gracefully dancing our way through life, which makes everything more enjoyable.

I like that you trust those little positive changes, that you claim them. They're yours now.

Thanks for the welcome. Yes I enjoyed writing it

Cheers I'm glad I'm not alone in the overwhelmingness of it. Whilst I still feel feel a sense of, not fear, not apprehension, Can't find the word for it, but the evidence is there it's doing business with me. In a positive way. Agreed! Trust is paramount.

Brilliant! that really resonates with my experience. Thank you
Bad choice of words here, but its like a short cut, to well being. My friends who have have know the chaotic disorder that my life has been have been visibly shocked by the subtle yet significant changes to practical things like my housekeeping. Its like I feel a need a need for order in my life, little habits that have been unhelpful companions for many years no longer pull me. For me this is priceless.
The shift that is occuring in me is perking the curiosity of my little community.

Aside from the external shifts, I've had episodes of significant trauma over the past few years and I can feel a beginning of healing taking place, with the support of some close friends.

I have noticed this very same phenomenon with the Spice and I have actually come to the point where I can say honestly that the thing I enjoy the most from DMT is NOT the trip itself, but instead the way it subtly changes me for the better, especially for the first few days/weeks after a journey. It is truly a blessing to have this tool in one's toolbox!

I have lately also been contemplating how I receive very similar affects, much like we're talking about here, from micro-dosing LSD.



This is what I am going to experiment with next. I'm figuring that if I can get beneficial affects days afterwards from micro-doses of acid, why not get those same beloved after-affects from DMT without having to break through and go through the whole rollercoaster ride of what that entails. I mean, I'm old and I've tripped serious balls thousands of times on all sorts of psychedelics and thoroughly enjoyed it, but I'm definitely into more mellow experiences these days and their wonderful, lingering after-affects.

Peace to you brussh and welcome to the Nexus!

Cheers Doc, this is surely an incredible journey. I can't help but feel the years I squandered in mind altering, purely for recreation and escapism have maybe got me to that place now, where sometimes my eyes get so wide open they hurt lol.