Hello all,

I thought I'd post a bit about myself, I don't know how this will flow together, but I'm trying to keep everything as accurate as possible. I'm interested in trying DMT, but I'm not really in a hurry. Just quickly, I'm 23 and its not an understatement if I said that I have wasted these years and not spent them experiencing life. I have social anxiety and I hate being around other people as I've been very insecure in myself.

I recently started using cannabis a year ago, and it helped me turn my life around. I didn't use the weed for fun per se, after the initial honeymoon period I found out how you can use it for deep reflection and that lead me some surprising revelations about myself that I will go into some of them. Even tho it was 'only' weed, I can see why some people consider it as a weak psychedelic.

As I said, I have been wasting my life away because of my anxiety and confidence issues, so apart from when I worked, I would spend almost 100% of my time in my room locked away from the rest of my family. I didn't actually realize that this was hurting my family because I wasn't spending any time with them. I also had a very depressive demeanor that I didn't really realize how other people perceived it and then perceived me as a person. Even tho I had anxiety and depression, in my head I would still know 'who' I was as a person, but only I knew who that person was because I never made an effort to make appearances with my family, and when they did see me they only saw what I projected.
Well, one day when I took some weed I had this very unsettling experience where I sort of 'saw' how others actually saw me. and I was pretty ashamed at how I had been acting (even tho I never actually caused trouble, I caused worry among my family as they thought I actually hated them which was far from the truth). So after a few hours of experiencing this I vowed to change. Not to change 'who' I was, as I knew who I was, but to make a change so others can see me for who I actually am.
So the next day I stopped staying in my room and spent most of my non-working time with my family. it was awkward at first because I knew they were wondering why I'm being like this, but after some time it got to the point where it is now 'the norm'. I have now also been doing activities that my family enjoys, like fishing and stuff (even tho I don't really like it, but I know they do so I do it anyway). So now I actually have a proper relationship with my family, and even tho it is actually mentally taxing for me, I'm happy I made this change because I would rather put their happiness over my own.
Don't get me wrong, I do like spending time with them, but deep down im still an introvert to the highest degree, and i will admit that all of their personalities clash with my own personality, but i just don't let any of it visibly bother me and i just keep going (my mother has severe bipolar and gets psychotic delusions, my dad is very extroverted with a temper, and my sister is manipulative and selfish, and I'm a very analytical introvert... I'm not saying that in a bad way, just as a matter of fact)

I still haven't tried to make any friends tho, and I don't plan to, I just did this change for my family.

I recently stopped weed as i want to begin a meditation called NSR meditation which is a cheaper version of Transandental Meditation, and it calls for no weed. i'm on about 15 days without weed, and i should be able to start the meditation soon. I'm hoping i can bring some sort of inner contentment for myself via the meditation.

One reason I want to try DMT oneday (but it isn't the only reason, my other reasons are probably similar to most people, just this one is slightly different) is because I have a lazy eye so I cannot see in 3d vision, only in 2d vision, apparently I don't know what the world really looks like (I am basing this assumption on the fact I do have a lazy eye and that I have problems with depth perception, and then I found out on the internet about that people with lazy eyes only see in 2d and it made sense) I also have a degree of industrial deafness due to working around machines, I also have a poor sense of smell due to exposure to H2S at my work which deadens your sense of smell, I also damaged my taste buds from scraping my tongue very hard when I was paranoid about having bad breath for a while. I also think I have Aphantasia, which is when you can't visualize anything in your mind, as in I can't visually imagine anything all I see is darkness if I close my eyes. So as you might be able to tell, I feel like I am living in a bit of a prison with all these poorly functioning senses (which I'm supposed to be able to appreciate the world through), so I would like to be able to experience something that will allow me to witness something of true magnitude where I am able to see that there is something 'more'. I don't know if that's a very 'honorable' reason to use DMT, but it is one of my reasons nonetheless (this also goes for why I want to begin meditation)

Also, i will admit that I hope i can get promoted soon as a big reason i joined was becasue i wanted to PM someone about a post i read regarding something I am currently interested in and trying to gather information.


Thanks for reading. I hope this helps me get promoted.

Nice to hear that you've started spending more time with your family and that you feel like you've changed for the better by using weed, find it quite interesting as I've never heard a story like you're with weed.

But man, you seem to have a lot of problems with your senses. I think DMT can help you get a feeling of the senses you're missing out on and maybe live a happier life (I think your reason is totally valid). Please make a post after you've tried it, as it could be very interesting as it's always good to have more research about people with problems and how DMT help/din't help them.

Welcome a mere speck,

A nice name as DMT will make you feel like a mere speck, while at the same time a vitally important one! Nothing works without you

Reading your story though screams micro dose shrooms. I think it would REALLY help you. Do a quick Google or YouTube search on it. I no longer feel I require it but they are a great tool for more confidence and feeling comfortable being you. I highly recommend it.

As for your reasoning for DMT I think you will get more than you hoped for and its a perfectly rational reason for wanting the experience in my eyes.

You'll be just fine.

Thanks! Yeah, I had no idea that weed would do that to me. Maybe its just because I'm naturally a very analytical person and I will think about something for a very long time when most people wouldn't give it a second thought. Although it was confronting when I was hit with these realizations, I'm grateful for having them.

I will also say, that during the time this was happening, and I was sort of experiencing the emotions of my family, I actually felt some sort of physical pain, like a sort of 'wave' of emotions that I literally felt like I had been hit in the head (it sort of felt deep inside my brain). That made the experience all the more surprising.

I've read of people saying weed makes them very introscopic, but nothing to the degree that I experienced. It was just what I needed tho.


I will definately keep an update on how it goes (including how the meditation goes, as i will be starting that shortly)

Thanks! I also thought it was fitting for this subject. Although I haven't tried DMT, I have been researching a lot about various spiritual beliefs from other cultures, so I have a bit of an idea about how insignificant I am (but i'm sure DMT would still be able to take me down a few notches!) but you are correct that every little thing matters!

That is interesting, I have also looked a bit into microdosing and it does seem like it can be very useful. I think microdosing is a good way to help unlock a persons true potential, like a daily dose of vitamins for the mind. Thanks for the suggestion