Hi!

I'm pretty new to the DMT world and I have very little experience but I had a two that were a bit disconcerting, to say the least. They were not bad but not good either, they were just very strange.

The first one I think I blacked out because I can't remember much and maybe a took a little too much DMT. I remember flashes of it but I do CLEARLY remember when I woke up and it was crazy. I thought years had passed and I felt extremely weird, like I died long ago and I was someone else already but I got back to this place, body, time for some reason. The hallucinations stopped in the normal frame of time (about 15 min) but the sensation is kind of still there, although not that intense, and it's been a couple of days already.

The second experience was even weirder! I took a little bit less but still too much, I think. I let it hit me with my eyes open and when it started, it was too late to close them because I had no eyes anymore, I couldn't even imagine closing my eyes or even having them, it was an alien thought for me. Things got pretty crazy, very fast. I was seeing so much stuff so fast I couldn't even process it. It was going faster and faster, I could also hear everything going faster and faster, it was really driving me crazy. Then I was seeing everything at the same time and then nothing for a couple seconds. I thought "reality" was no more, there was no "time", there was just nothing. Then I got back to the crazy flashes and when I tried to think about the situation, something was wrong...I couldn't explain to myself what reality was. I couldn't think about reality. It's like if I ask you to think about "ksldjgsaldk", it makes no sense to you and you can't even comprehend what I'm talking about, it just doesn't exist for you, not even in your imagination. This lasted for more than ONE HOUR! I was tripping really hard of one hour and I thought that was it, I was never going back to "reality" (still couldn't understand what that was). My body was moving too fast for me to control it and everything I touched felt like it was melting or something. I know it was really one hour because I know I started at about 5 pm and the trip was still going at 6 pm and even more.

Anyways, I won't make this longer. I am just curious about what happened here. Have any of you had similar experiences? Am I doing something wrong or why is this happening? Now I really don't know what anything is. I still struggle to get my head around the term "reality", it just really doesn't make much sense to me anymore.

I'm taking some days, maybe a week or more to think about all of this.

What are your thoughts about this?

And that my friend is the dmt experience.

How you worded this, to me it's pretty apparent that it hit you good.

I've said this to so many newer members here that have had these powerful experiences, but - this experience can be so incredibly powerful and reality/self obliterating 1,000,000,000x over, and you can/will wind up in a place/realm that endlessly trumps any possible conceivable notion of what you think your 'self', reality, the world, the universe even is; it puts it all into stark starkkkk contrast; flips all ideals and notions on their head; and endlessly romps you in the face with it, rubs your nose in it, showing you how little you know..

There's those occasional experiences like yours - to where its so strong, so powerful - that reality, you and everything is far far gone, and your eyes? what eyes? Opened or closed...it does NOT matter ..and that isn't some flight of fancy metaphor.. And this doesn't seem to happen for everyone - which I'm not sure what the deal is, but those that it does hit like this ...you ..will..know.

When you think "oh no I done too much! ", 'imho' ..that's when you did 'enough'.

Learn to stay with it - in whatever fashion you can learn to, learn to just be with it, no judgement, just be with it..

Learn to hang on, it's hard and you 'can' blackout if the incoming experience is too much for you to process. Everyone will most likely be different there; not everyone's cut from the same cloth in that regard, though I'd imagine over time you can learn to handle it to a better degree than previous and/or become more receptive to its...breadth and depth..

Welcome


**Also, i'm not advocating for the first time to dose all willy-nilly, and go all out with a huge amount, definitely work up to it. Respect and caution with this experience/substance is key. <3

Holy shamolians! idk if I've been that high. I can't imagine being higher then shrooms, and though there are some similarities your trip is definitely different. I suppose they are all different but I would love to hear more about high dose experiences. I am just training myself to "stay with it" to see what's there on increasingly larger doses. They seem to infinitely trump any small dose insight one might get. Be careful though, it can be a bit disconcerting! I've heard of people feeling "out of it" for up to a year!

Hahaha, welcome, welcome!

Glad you reached out eskhol, that's a very profound set of experiences. It's so interesting that as a person in this world any one of us can feel just about anything in the universe.

Actually I remember the nexian jamie talking about some high dose huasca which left him in a realm of nothingness which he noted was unpleasant...

@tatt I'm happy to hear about the mystery!
One day I'm gonna jettison myself when the time is just right
I'm guessing on one of those whirlwinds of synchronicity that sometimes pass by

I know what you mean.

Cheers

Yes, i sort of had the second one once, it was a very powerful and life changing experience.
Sounds to me you had a proper introduction alright

Thanks for the replies everyone! I haven't introduced myself properly but I already feel welcome so thank you!

@tatt It seems each time you take it you can see and feel more. The feelings are so intense and impossible to explain though. It's not something I can even imagine feeling right now but when I do, it somehow makes sense. I still have to learn a lot and I am excited to do it

@aruse Yes...I am still feeling very weird and I've been having some mild version of that trip for 2 nights. I would wake up in the middle of the night and begin having those sensations (very fast images or some sort of fast vibrations in my field of view, hard to explain) and when I close my eyes I have some mild visuals. Also I have very vivid dreams now, about 2 or 3 per night. Psychological effects? Well, I feel the "person" I was died on my first trip so yeah, not looking like I'm going back now and that is fine by me.

The weird thing about those two trips is that, on some other mild trips I had I always heard some sort of buzzing noise at the beginning (very recognizable, like I already heard it somewhere), I felt like I was going somewhere, to a familiar place and I felt nice entities and saw interesting things. Everything was at a more or less normal speed and there was a transition between feeling my body and feeling like I was nothing, just a consciousness floating somewhere. But on those two I was directly shot into nothingness, not buzzing, no familiarity, everything was extremely fast and just all of the sudden looking like I was outside of reality, unable to recognize anything at all, feeling like I saw reality reduced to nothing and being "born" again.

So now I will maybe extract a bit more and try again next week! Again, thanks everyone for the warm welcome!

Also to add a little bit onto what I'd said earlier:

If you're able to - make a day out of it, ritualize it, offer your day to it. Spend the day outdoors, get some exercise, maybe talk or hangout with a few close friends, have some laughs; contemplate your past experiences; have some fruit, drink alot of water, eat a nice light/healthy meal or two, lay in the grass, touch a tree.

The couple hours leading up to - take a nice shower, put on some loose fitting clothes, clean a space, organize things, make all this an offering; the experience will thank you. Make yourself as comfortable as possible, relaxed, loose, and fluid.

Music can be an incredible driving force; and it also can help anchor you [up until a point] in certain respects. Same thing that shamans do in the amazon occasionally - rhythmic/acoustical driving; think of it as sort've a life-vest in a sense. It helps immensely, if the music is right for the occasion. The experience can/will grab onto every note, every beat; gives a steering wheel to the experience in a sense; though past a certain dosage/point - music goes out the window more or less.

These things can make all the difference ime; and the experience will know - it's kind of funny like that.

Haapi Travels

** You get my vote.

Also normal, the trip is still unfolding, and perhaps the best part has not even happened yet.

In my early days when I first discovered DMT I had heard all these fantastic reports of transpersonal experiences and every experience I had I knew I was just dipping in my toe in the potential of what was there , I thought I was ready for anything so I kept pushing harder than what the experience was instructing me to and this would often lead to experiences where I felt like I was kind of lost in some place and they were often very uncomfortable and impossible to make any sense of.. Too much too soon, I eventually pushed it too far and had an experience I bit like the ones you described, absolute nothingness, no familiarity until eventually I made contact with a malevolent entity which left me shaken to my core.. I realized then that there was a reason that a standard breakthrough dose was giving me sub breakthrough experiences, because they were priming me for something that I was currently not ready to accept and so unable to process if I pushed my way there.

After this I took a long break and when I felt ready again I started at low doses focusing on taking in the experience and doing my best at fully submitting to the experience on low doses, Eventually I found myself having much deeper experiences on quite low doses than I'd been having on higher doses when I was rushing it. So I kept creeping my way forward and eventually, lesson after lesson, It gave me what I'd been looking for and it was so worth taking it slow for! The way you approach the experience both before and directly after smoking are a massive part of attaining those deep, healing experiences you're looking for and in my experience it's best practicing those things on lower doses.

Great posts guys, truly enjoyed reading this thread.

I can empathize a lot with the type of experience being discussed. Your words describe it perfectly!

@tatt I will definitely make it more of a ritual! I noticed when I am really relaxed and ready to just let myself go on the trip, everything is great.

@obliguhl I haven't thought about it that way, it would be very interesting!

@Pile of cats I also tried to start slow but then I started to push it a bit and well, someone/something didn't like it very much so I had these trips. Then I had more nice trips but I think I was still in the "I'm pushing it a bit too much" phase after those ones and had the second crazy trip, which was not unpleasant but was too much to handle without any experience. Now I'm going to take it easy. I have time, right? Just kidding, time means nothing!

I also have a recurring trip. One that looks like it unfolds the more trips I do. It's always in the same place but after each trip I discover more stuff. It feels like something/someone is trying to tell me something but my monkey brain is not able to understand it, at least for now.

Have you also had these kind of trips? In the same place and they have a sort of continuity to them.

I have had this kind of experience and can relate. After a life shattering trip early on I was left shocked, humbled and amazed. I remember as hyperspace approached thinking, "that was too much", then a few seconds later, "I don't need to do this again", Then a quick vision or memory of smoking and then all was gone. I was a beam of light except there was no I. I wont get into a trip report here...

After this experience I took a long break to integrate. The afterglow and after effects lingered. This is when I learned respect for spice and not enter each session with intent and purpose. Much like mentioned by @tatt. Maybe not that much preparation but I am not afraid to abort if I feel uneasy per-flight.

Also, I have a hard time keeping the dose low enough not to black out. I have a small threshold between breakthrough and blackout. I often miss it but find the experiences on either side of this rewarding as well.

Hope everything shakes out for the positive.

I would recommend you to try some potent ayahuasca. You'l be more like: "Oh, they actually mean 'qlrutwzswxingh'? why didn't they just say so in the first place?".

@dragonrider I will definitely do so! It's on my long list of things to try

one hour trip, in the physical world from smoked DMT? unheard of. gave a mate some yopo snuff with apparently a bit too much pure MaO-I, that lasted him around a whole hour also, but smoked DMT 1 hour? sounds very strange
the whole thing about reality becoming plainly visible and then dematerializing is supposedly what DMT is all about, its what the singularity is made of, everything and yet nothing. the trips ive had were very focused on this, it was as if i was trapped in allbeingness, entities around me were panicking almost more than i was as we were all trying to find a way to shut this awful program down of eternal existence, with no time only an eternal information overload replicating itself after dematerializing.
honestly my first breakthrough (had 2) came sneaking back at me and showed its nastyness to me after i had my second breakthrough, ever since then i havent dared to take a third hit, my first was most likely high in oxidized DMT (supposedly causes more nightmarish breakthroughs) and my experience was like an unimaginable nightmare, really just toyed around with by demons in the void and then submitted to information overload torture chamber.
ive had no such thing as seeing happy little elves dancing and singing, as by far most people report, and happen to report again and again, even with 5 breakthroughs in a row
even a year after my shroom trips as low as one single gramme starts out as the most vile badtrips, anything nightmarish and yet unexplainable will hit me, i also have DMT heavily carrying into just cannabis, but mostly in an entertaining psychedelic way.

been a year since breakthrough and for now im deciding to not have a breakthrough until i happen to die, ive come to the conclusion that we manifested lower realities and time as a means to space out allknowingness and to relax, as the oneness, the singularity is the one true hell, the inescapable matrix.

one guy i know, his grandfather had smoked DMT, highly jewish man, deep in esoteric and a notorious "club" - he told his grandson that he should never smoke DMT, possibly he had same experience as i did.

for comparison i find sleep paralysis intriguing and exciting, but my experiences with breakthroughs are really not encouraging for any newcomers, i feel like ive opened pandoras box and im destined for suffering, like it can only get worse

@clearness. Yeah mate. I also have a very fine line between breakthrough and blackout. It's a funny blackout though... it's like I never lose consciousness or have a total cutoff and wake up like I have with other blackouts, but kind of slip gently between the lines of remembering and not being able to remember. One time I took my camping chair out back in the forest and had a nice big hit of changa. As soon as I put down the bong I knew it was going to be strong. My vision filled with white light and golden geometry that emitted golden light. The next thing I knew the white light was fading but my head was hanging back like I was unconscious. More than 10 minutes had passed but there didn't seem to be a gap in the experience. I just lost all connection with my body and all ability to recall everything moments after it had occurred. I sat there for a while trying to salvage the memories as they evaporated, looking at the deep violets coming from flowers being enhanced by the afterglow, thinking "What a waste of time, there's no point if I can't remember it".

@TheInternetPolice Not exactly one hour trip. When I smoked it I think I blacked out or maybe it was just too intense for me to handle it and can't remember much. I have flashes of things I saw but not much, I remember feelings, places, etc. I think that lasted about 10 minutes but then the crazy hallucinations and feelings kept going with my eyes wide open. I thought reality was broken and I was trapped because I did something wrong and didn't know how to fix it and it would be like that forever.

Lately I've been having these weird dark trips, with a very weird feel to them. It doesn't feel right, it's not like in the beginning when it was all happiness, love, warmth, feeling like home, etc. Now it's dark, cold, lonely, even hostile but I don't really know why. I also think my latest batch was oxidized so maybe that's the reason behind all of this. Now I don't feel like I'm able to have those happy DMT trips again...I hope that's not true but I'm going to take a break nonetheless, especially after yesterday's trip. I feel a bit anxious and when it's dark I have very vivid hallucinations with my eyes open. I also think I'm not in the right mindset so I want to take it easy.

DMT has shown me a wonderful world that felt like home but my stupid monkey brain thought that I wasn't going fast enough and kept pushing it too much so it has also shown me that things don't work like that and I should treat it with the respect it deserves or I will regret it.

@Northernet @clearness I think I also have a fine line between breakthrough and blackout as I always seem to get either not enough or too much but the difference is minimal in quantity. I also noticed something. When I get too much DMT is always in one big toke that I can't even hold in because I'm already losing my body but when I don't get enough is usually when I do it in 3 tokes. It's not something I do because I want it like that but it just happens like that.

Sounds par for the course as far as my hyperspatial journeys have gone.

Some experiences simply just humble the hell out you; when one at last realises that no one knows what so-called "reality" is & if someone says that they know, one knows that they're full of complete & utter bullshit.

It certainly can be disconcerting, but why dabble with psychedelics otherwise? To feel all comfortable and certain that your ego and the human-ego-built world is real and all that there is to what narrow-minded dolts call life and death?

I think not!

Welcome to the mystery that cannot be solved!

Peace